DNA Is Done!

So over a year ago, I sent my DNA to Ancestry.Com for analysis.
I thought it would be a hoot and shut my family up on the entie American Indian question!

Unfortunately, the first sample I sent them - claimed there was no human DNA in the sample!
LOL!
Swede responded they should be testing for Neanderthal genes.
Yeah, we had a good laugh over that one!

So, I did it again ...

And the results?

Well:
Irish / Scottish 35%
Norse / Swedish 30%
Swiss 30 %
Spanish 3%
Welsh 2%

So, that fits with Grandmother being Scotch/Norse and Welsh.
My Swiss Grandmother being a mixture of Swiss nobility, with Spanish nobility.
It works with what I suspected!

But Grandfather was far from being Native American!

It is interesting that father being purely German-Swiss is off by 30% !
So some unknown part of him was either Norse or Scottish!
Oh my!

And as they also documented,
NO one with any of my DNA patterns has so far been documented!
Not even to the fifth generation back from me!
Aren't I unique .....

Grace & Complications

When you think of David, in the Bible, it is hard to see how God could think of him as righteous. 
Or, even as to having a good heart.
Of all of the people in the Bible, he is the least one of interest to me.
An egotist, a narcisist, an adulterer, a murderer, a polygamist, a  nudist, a really rotten father.
God help you if you were his daughter!
Oh yeah, you really want this guy for a neighbor!
NOT!!!!!!

I have often commented, David really does not want to run into me in Heaven!

2 Samuel 7:11-16

Look Back
See God's Grace in your past.
It seems it is best considered in hindsight.
You can see God's hand in your life but only if you are willing to LOOK.
And yes, God can be found even the worst of situations...

David did nothing to deserve God's favor.
From a nothing family.
The runt of the litter so to speak.
He was not even called to the family, to be examined by Samuel!

God uses the least of us,
In the areas of our weaknesses,
To show us His power,
And, ways.

David never did fully get what he deserved.
Think on how you have not either!

Look Out!
God's Grace and Disciple work together.

David often found himself in the wrong place at the wrong time!
II Samuel 11, tells us of his fall.
Uriah, had what David lacked: INTEGRITY !
David sets up Uriah's death, to cover his sin with Bathsheba.
A simple case of lust, adultery and murder.

And the Prophet Nathan has to call David on the carpet!
David repented.
We all need to repent.
But there are still consequences for our failures.

Look Forward
In spite of our mess ups, God's Grace is always there!
If we ask for it!

God blesses us.
God forgives us.
God wants His best for us.

And now I could suddenly understand David.
I was just like him.
No matter how much I loved God or desired to serve Him:
My heart was just as corrupted.
My mind was just as stupid.
My eyes were just as blind.

And God's Grace covers me,
Just as much as it did David three thousand years ago.
In Heaven, rather than punching out David, now
I guess we will share a coffee and talk on how great God is ...
How stupid we are - long forgotten.

A Strange Door

When I found myself suddenly jobless in 2010, I had a hard think on what to do.
It quickly became evident that no one was going to hire anyone in the Seattle market whom was over 45.
I could return to Switzerland, Germany or Scotland - but I had lost most of my wealth in a bad land deal.
In fact I was stuck and quite impoverished, but God was providing.
I also had a grandchild to consider.
And a second daughter involved in a series of disasters.
sigh.

So summer was coming along and I had no plans.
None at all.

There was a call for volenteers to teach Vacation Bible School.
Never done it.
But how hard could it be?

Years later, and the call went out for teachers again.
But I was incredibly ill.
And NO doctor could figure it out.
So, I did not respond.

The night before the first day, the lady running the program called.
Begging me to just come and take a morning class.
They expected 30 kids.
Yeah, she guilted me into it!

I showed up and the were almost 90!
I had nothing.
So, while the sang and prayed,
I was praying to ... for just the slightest clue as to subject, message and method.

And the story of Jonah leapt to mind, literally as I opened my mouth!

It turned into an entire week.
Everyone bailed.
I was utterly exhausted by Thursday and still had to do a wrap on Friday!

All through the classes these two little girls sort of stuck by me.
No idea why.
I guess they thought I was safe.
Later, I was to learn they had no father.

In the five years since, I have rarely seen them.
They are always happy to see me,
And still remember those lessons!

Sunday, I was not in good shape.
The surgical scars were all painful.
I got little sleep.
And no one really ever talks to me.
sigh...

I was down.

Suddenly, there was the eldest of these two girls.
Excited to see me.
Talked with me even!
And a big hug!

And I thought on this at lunch.
She never would have been an encouragement to me,
Except for my willingness to do something for Him so long ago.
Somehow she found something in those messages which spoke to her.
She is amongst the few.
It is a mystery to me,
How God works,
And why.
90 kids came, two stuck to me like glue,
At least one seems to have walked away with more .....

Surprise!

(heavily edited to resemble English!  Sorry ...)

I was sitting in my chair, at the kidney center, nodding off as the TV was just too mind numbing!
The director lady walked up to talk with me.
I am always uncomfortable around her, as I have no idea where she is coming from!
She maybe a very nice person, but I doubt I will ever know one way or another!

So, she is highly excited, and tells me:
I have  been selected to have a kidney transplant by Swedish Hospital!
OMG!!!!!

You have to understand that you have a year's worth of testing, then a board decides your success factors for matching, then hospitals decide if they want to offer their services to you!
And, for some reason, Swedish has leapt the gun on me!

So, I see my kidney doctor next week and see if she knows why!
And I also will be beginning the matching process on Thursday.

I am terribly humbled and grateful, even if it never happens.

All I can think of is that: my constant blood draws show I do not smoke, drink nor do drugs.
This makes me quite the exception there!
I know no one's story there but if you were looking for substance addiction indicators ... they are plainly evident!
So, maybe I am just either lucky or am so boring that a transplant might be successful?

Maybe my days are not up quite yet ....
But what a painful experience this has been!

Musical Saturday Morning

This could also be titled, "Why 1980's Rock is So Great!"

Yeah, from 1979 - and just what is wrong with "music", because so much of it is just so unpleasant!

Box of Memories

I have been looking for my Great-Uncle Leonard's wedding ring.
I know I had it back before the trip to Canada, but 7 surgeries wiped any memory of it from my mind!
Where the heck could I have put it?

I thought it was in my safety-deposit box. but no.
Perhaps in my keepsake box?  But no again!
Out of ideas!

Somewhere in this house ... sigh

But, I did go through my box:
Cards from my grandchildren.
Little notes from my children.
A thank you from my youngest for having adopted her ....

A thank you, from the SHE, for not having been like every other male.
In the end, she never understood.
Her worldview was too far from my reality.
What do I know now, other than sorrow?
Thanks for nothing amnesia!
(you will have to know your H Rider Haggard,to understand!)

School pictures.
All of my report cards.
(yeah, well,  they said it  all!)
The map from my canoe trip into Canada, longest taken in 650 years!
All of the newspaper articles.

The target from the first time I ever shot a rifle.
Awards for school attendance.
Old passports with the "NATO Death Stamp" - " not allowed within 70 miles of a communist  border!"
Funny photos which will never appear here!

A letter from a friend in high school.
Who just now popped into town as I was writing this!
I have NO memory of him.
What-so-ever!
So it will be interesting to see what "pops" loose in my mind!
(and i now have my first fiancee's name, thanks to the letter!  yeah, really old! 1974!)

In fact, I would guess than my memories are now solid through age 12 only!

Blogs

Blogging is sort of fun.
I guess a challenge would be more accurate.

I used to have 14 simultaneous blogs, on all sorts of subjects!
Now days it is sometimes stressing just having one!

I never kept backups however.
:(

So I want to do one on rock collecting.
Treasure hunting.
Gold crystals.
Painting.

Well, that ought to be enough to fill my idle retired days!
Its an idea, should I live so long!
Yeah .....

Looked at my stats for the first time in a spell.
Seems the US is now the home to most readers.
Followed by Portugal and Russia.

For most downloads, Russia still leads the pack!
Maybe my site is required in an English class or ?????????
Just seems odd.

Comparatively, Thoughts from the Little Apple, still out flanks this newer site.
Even after years of not being added too!
And I always said some of my best work could be found there.

When I read it, as I have done last year, I am struck by what a Smuck I really am!

Mother Bear!

I tell yah, my mother will be the end of me!
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrggggggghhhh!

So she called Monday afternoon to tell me I have to give her a ride Tuesday to Sumner so she can photocopy something.
Now my longest drive was 6 miles in the past seven months!
She doesn't her desires are all that matter!
Not my concussion, discomfort driving, nothing but that she get to sumner!

Ten it turns out she is being evicted from her trailer park!
Well if you don't play nicely with others ....
sigh ....!

So I will be  driving the 45 miles in short stages.
Your prayers are needed since I must also drive home!
sigh  ..... !

Lots of sleep is what is needed first!

Not Exemplary

So I taught high school age youth for 40 years.
First as a Bible teacher on Sundays and evening studies, then also as a Geology teacher.

Anytime I taught under a new venue, there was always the same command:
No Song of Solomon
No Eden discussions
No Genesis 38

Well easy enough.
I am not comfortable with those subject matters as it is.
Just ask my adopted son!

And really, if you want to see the fall of man, look no further than the newspapers.
Pick the male, find no exemplary examples of manhood.
Does not matter if you are Prince Harry, Arnold Schwarzeneggar or Albert Einstein ....
No one on this list, that is for sure!
Exemplary men are few to be found, especially in the Bible!

So, I was reading Genesis 38 on Saturday, and thinking: "Judah really sucks!"
Two of his sons were so evil that God flat took them out!
But, Judah was no better than his sons ... it appears ... and yet God gave him another chance.
A trial by his daughter-in-law, Tamar!

And God humbled him in front of his neighbors, his friends, his family, extended family, etc.
A complete and total humiliation!
Unlike my examples; whom blew off their failures, Judah, chose to change!

No, you would have to read elsewhere to know this, but he did.
And as Jacob lay dying, he choose Judah as the next in line ...
He had seen the change.
He SAW that his son Judah had chosen to take corrective action of his error.

You are left wondering why God killed Judah's two sons, yet left him alive.
Perhaps his sons failures were seen as non-redeemable?
Yet, Judah, was?

Hmmmmm, and though mind has now only recovered memories through age 18, currently, I can say that I am not impressed with what little I know of myself!
Could Judah have been any worse than I?
Or you?
Has God given us another chance?
Have you taken the opportunity?
Changed direction or corrective action?

Yeah.
Hard, but it can be done ...
Judah proved the point.

Reflection Wednesday's Conversation

Swede came over Thursday, after I had done my post.
He was very disturbed, but hey, he is an engineer!

He went through the story of what happened at the coin store on Wednesday with the little old man.

"So, what would you have done?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well if you sell the medal publicly, he is dead.
"If you report him, he is dead.
"Even if you just donate the medal, he may well end up dead!"

Swede sucked in his breath, as he does so often when he thinks.
"I don't really know.
"Do we judge a man for errors made in his youth?"
Swede's face winced at the thought.
Yeah, we all have pasts ...
And he knew well my father and of my uncle whom had been SS.
(though my uncle Fritz was a  very nice man!)
It was a lively conversation.
Even we could not agree with ourselves!

Friday, I was at the dealers again.
I do identifications and valuations on rare stuff for him.
Friday is turn in day for the week's work.

"Kris, what do I do?"
So, I explained Swede's and my thought processes and conclusion.
He sighed and muttered under his breath.

It is the classic catch-22, can you condemn someone for what they did 75 years ago?
When it is very apparent they are no that person anymore?
And then what about you?
You have a past as well!

Many decades ago, three Dutch women were tried for being SS guards during the War.
It generated some very strong reactions.
There is no apparent justice when you are threatening grand and great-grandparents with death for that they were when they were young in very trying times.
Justice does not seem to be served no matter how you view any decision.

Especially, if you can remember you deserve death too ...
Before God!

Remember my post last week about Grace?
This is where maturity and discernment are called for.
But whom prays for discernment these days?
It is not even understood!
Were it a pill, maybe more would have it these days!
And yet, we are promised that it will!

Prayer and much thought ....

Musical Saturday Morning

Grace

Grace, that weird word used to describe God's love for us.
It is supposed to mean: love which is unearned, unwarranted, freely given ...
And totally one sided, at least at first!
Yet, Jesus needed to communicate this concept, somehow, to a world not even looking for Him.

Did you know that Jesus never used the term Grace, at all, that is documented for us?
However, Jesus illustrated grace with His stories and actions during His lifetime.
But to understand this, you have to see that Jesus represents God's love for us!

Genesis chapter 15

Don't Believe Your Own Press (Pravda!)
We know in ourselves, that we are worse than we would like to admit.
(unless, you are pathological and unable to know our own truth. but that is luckily might rare!)
We do have the ability to see how great God is through the Bible,
Not how great we are!
Genesis 12, not how great Abram was, but how great God was to even bless him!
He was just your average everyday pagan, idol worshiping, fallen man.

Start Trusting God
Abram  was asked to "go".
And he did!
Abram wanted a son, in order to have an heir.
God asks him to trust Him.
And he does.
This was the basis by which he was declared righteous before God!

It is no different for anyone ... ever ... we are all asked to trust God.
But we do not do so well.
Our eyes are not on Him.
Our faith is actually in ourselves, to our determent.

In like fashion, Abram lost faith and thus Ishmael was born.

Understand That Grace is Unilateral
In Abram's culture, an agreement (covenant) ceremony was performed.
Butchered animals, to be destroyed by fire, and you walk through the midst of this!
Pictorially, if you break this agreement, either party, then this is what they may do to you. Or visa-versa!

And God walked the trench alone - symbolizing that He would be punished if either party broke the agreement!

Be Tested
Pick your weakest point - expect to be challenged!

Issac, the longed for son, arrives.
Ishmael is sent away (it would seem Abraham really wanted him and the mother dead!) .
And Abraham is told to sacrifice Issac!

Abraham set off to do as told.
Issac had faith in his father and this unknown God.
And did was he was told.  (he could have easily not done so! His father was around 100 by now!)

Issac is spared.
And in time Abraham's promises were fulfilled.

So, what is the point?
We see high and low points in Abra's life.
We see that God only asks you to trust Him.
Not to live by your wits!
You will make bad choices, for which there can be complications even for your descendants 3,000 years later!
And God will be faithful to His word .....

So, drag yourself back to where God wants you and trust Him.
You are already showered with Grace.
So just trust Him .....

Pasts Which Do Not Fade

He was a little shrunken man.
You know:
Body bent by age,
Skin wrinkled and flaky,
Legs and hands shook constantly.

Like so many he sought to sell his coins.
Ill health is costly in this country.
The dealer started sorting through what was there.

But it was his eyes .....

I was just watching, people fascinate me.

"Uhm, Kris, can you translate this?"
I looked at the bronze disk in his hand.
The old man was shaking.
"What do you think it is worth?"
Literally, I was shaken.
I put the disk down and had to fight back tears.
As best I could, I croaked out that it was priceless.
They agreed on some sum and the old man left happy.

We watch him leave.
In a low voice the dealer asked, "What is it Kris?"
"It was a man's life, Paul ... his very soul."
The little Lithuanian man was almost out of sight now.
"What does that mean?"

So I explained one of most sought after WWII medals, because ALL men with one were summarily executed!
And six women as well.
A Star of David with
The words, "SONDERKAMMANDO"

And then the real test, whom was it issued to?

On the reverse, the highly stylized "SS" of Hitler's special units.
Often these were Jewish "volunteers".  (cough,cough)
The exterminators of their kinsmen.

This man was SS, assigned more than likely to Polnar (sp?), a Lithuanian Jewish extermination camp.
About 350,000 Jews were shot to death.
Dug up years later and cremated so the Russians would not find the burial trenches!
Eleven Jews survived Lithuania there.

"What should I do with it?", Paul whispered.
"Donate to a Jewish war museum or Holocaust Museum ..."

Yeah, it was those eyes .....
Haunted by decades of memories.
And the memory of failing his God.
Now he understood, unlike my father or uncle.
And he feared because he saw that I "knew".
But ...

Shalom, little man.
May your heart find peace,
With the Prince of Peace ....
This German understands.
This descendant of Hebrews will not condemn you.
This forgiven man, broken by God, hopes you read this ...

Success!

So, a 2018 Toyota Rav4 getting ready for my driveway!
First new car since 1987!

I paid about half what my daughter paid 2 years ago .....
Yeah, they saw her coming!

Car Shopping

Well, I continue to recover from the heart attack and car wreck, I have been searching Craigslist and Consumer's Report for a new beastie.

Originally, I considered Hyundai, Toyota, Honda and Ford.
Ford was eliminated quickly once they announce a complete dropping of their product line!
Hyundai does not produce parts for cars older than 5 years old.
Honda and Toyota were tied.

In the end, I narrowed it down to a Rav4 Toyota.
I like the older Rav4's, not so much the newer ones.
And the thoughts of coughing up $35,000 for a car gags me!
There are plenty of 2013 - 2015's with less than 70,000 miles and running about $10,000.
But it is not for me, so GG has to be comfortable with it!

Next up is walking to the bank and finishing the paperwork!
So, I had best be going ...

Home Again

The RedRoof Inn in SeaTac is a very nice place to stay in the area, but being home to my bed is wonderful!  Especially my pillow ... I missed it!

And only the first few hours back were horrible to my lungs.  Thank God for Tylenol Cold and Flu ...

Mother's Day went okay, most of the kids and grand-kids showed up to honor Gaelic Girl.
Conversely, I got 4.5 hours of hate speech from my mother!  Why do I even try?!?!??!?

Okay it had not been my desire to go into Viola and Yvonne, but emails demand otherwise!
Sigh ...

Viola went by Sam, her nickname, when I met her.
She was a computer nerd belonging to a customer I supported back in 1970's.
Sharp as a whip,blond, married, one kid.
And the klutziest person I ever met - continual injuries!
But, there was this nagging clicking sound in back of my mind ...
I "knew" there was more to the story, but I was terribly naive!

One day she did not greet me the usual way.
No one else in the office had noticed anything, but I instantly did.
I had to force her to face me and when I did ...
She looked as though a boxer had worked her over!
Apparently, husband gave her the ultimate Mother's Day gift:
A fat face for - are you ready for this?
The wrong temperature for his coffee!!!!!

I held her for a while until another woman showed up and took her to the bathroom.
Then I called her father and asked him to come immediately!
He flew the distance to our office building.
Husband did not survive the day, I heard.
Viola decided she liked, that I liked, her real name and took it back up.
She moved and I never heard from her again.
No one did.
And I never pressed her father for information.
They both knew how to reach me.

I have prayed all these years for her.

As for Yvonne ...
I was visiting a new church and sent to the adult sunday scool.
I walked in the room and I instantly "knew" a lady there.
But I was clueless.
I never knew anyone named "Louise", much less a redheaded one!
GG is the only redhead I have ever known!
Never mind that she dyes her hair brown!

Then one year later she brought her mother.
And it all clicked!
Her mother was my teacher back in the 1950's, down in Portland!
So, Louise was really Yvonne, aka Vonnie!
Her red hair was really brown!
Her brother had been my best friend until a return to Europe intervened!

And I went from "freaky-guy" to suddenly best friend.
And it seemed she needed one.
Short story:
Husband was a drug addict and abusive when stoned.
It was hard to believe!

But one night I got a call ...
With super human strength he had smashed her face,
Then thrown her through a wall!
They were afraid I was going to take him on,
And trust me, were it not I had just had cancer surgery on my back ....
So, I called the police and an ambulance!
She was still out when they hauled her to ER.

It all broke my heart.
A second friend, an equally sweet lady, abused for years!
It was hard to understand.
I had known many a stoner, but no one was like this!

He was shunned by his children,
Once they let him out of prision.
He went back for trying to stock his ex-wife.

A name change, a new location and she disappeared.

Someday, I hope we cross paths again.
And, I pray regularly for her as well.
She was one of the few real Princesses I have known,
And yet she was treated worse than a dog .............
By the very man whom should have known far better!

Okay, happy now?
You have bummed me out ....

Musical Saturday Morning

In Loving memory of Viola aka "Sam" ...
And Yvonne aka The Ice Queen, from posts several years ago.
And numerous others I have known.
No I am not likely to mention them again.
Just because their story is far too common I fear.

Fumigation, again

Yes, those stinking ants just will not leave!
So, house was sprayed again on Tuesday ....
But house is again poisonous to my lungs.
Now at a hotel for three days while the house airs out.

One of "my boys" said it took three years to rid his house of these nasty little creatures!
Aaaaargh!

So, just sitting and watch the volcano in Hawaii erupting ......
I need a stick and some wieners to roast!
To truly get in the mood ....

Iron Sky

So Swede brought over, "Iron Sky", thinking I had not seen it.
He was right.
And at minute 5 he was having to calm me down!
He forgot how touchy I am on the subject of NAZI's!

So no spoiler alert here, it is about a NAZI base on the moon, accidentally discovered in 2018 by US astronauts!
This 2012 film looks forward from 2012 to 2018.
Sarah Palin is the President looking forward on to how to get re-elected.
And into her lap falls what she thinks are play NAZI's from the "moon".

Okay, I will not spoil this one for you.

The Finish and Australian writers do not understand what lay behind the politics.
But that is not surprising in an age were history has no meaning.
They do however understand Wagner's Rings.
So, quietly this movie revolves through the story of the Ring.
Hilariously!

Were it not for my amnesia, I would know when the last time I have laughed so hard was!
And probably in all of the wrong places, judging by Swede and Gaelic Girl's responses!
But it was funny, incredibly so!
Yeah, I am a sick German!

Whomever the writers, they did a good job in creating a fantasy and making it work!
That is a statement you will not hear from me often!

Costuming was good.
Dialog rough! Though they used "swear" words I had no recollection of in German...
Concept straight out of Mars Attacks.
Music by Laibach - always a favorite!

Problems:
Brutish treatment of women by the Oberführer, all to historically accurate.
Women have a place, but .... yeah ... not politically correct.
One very uncomfortable sequence where I hit fast forward, can't tell you if they did or didn't!
And it had NO place in the film!

Outside of the fact that today's audience may find much of it shocking, due today's political correctness,
this is quite a good film!
But due to the one sequence, crude humor and language - it is on you if you see this!
You are warned ...

My father was a NAZI to the day he died.
So, I have no love for the subject matter.
But am painfully aware of the extent to which National Socialism went.
Thankfully, this film does not go that far.
Would I own this?
Probably, just as in Mars Attacks - the invader gets theirs!

And I learned on the internet, that there is an Iron Sky 2 and 3!

Musical Saturday Morning

Probably have posted this before,
Usually associated with Art Bell's Coast To Coast Radio.
But by The Alan Parsons Project.
A group from the 1970's,
Lost in a sea of competition,
And then computers became popular!

So, from the short period when there was music and also computers .....
By someone other than ELO .....

Demonic Opposition

I do not tend to dwell on the demonic aspects of our faith - there are troubles enough without looking for them!
No, I do not believe that a Christian can experience any form of demonic possession.
But I have to admit to really wondering about some so called brothers and sisters in the faith!
eepah!

Now the mother of "my Aussie boy" from back in the 1970's, is one of those.
When I met her she was the mother of four teenagers!
eepah!

And, she was horribly broken - as were her children.
No one could understand my compassion for her.
But then it was because her history was not that different than mine.
.
I have tried to understand her brokenness for decades.
And I finally have.
But mind you, she has now been dead for decades.

Her son was trapped in Singapore.
The result of the air corridor closures in 2001.
I was able to be there, only because I was  called and hopped a plane to be with her.
She died before I got there.
sigh .....

But her pastor son in-law had made it.
Had convinced her she had nothing to lose in asking for forgiveness.
And she was written off as extremely troubled.
If not demonically possessed!
Such a legacy of pain her life story left behind!
eepah!

But, in my studies last week, I came to understand why I could relate to her.
And why her life was the way it was!
By way of having examined my own life .....

Like me, she had been raped at a young age.
Like me she was blamed and no one believed us.
Like me there was no one to turn to.
Like me she did not come from a Christian family.
And, so, was defenseless.

Then one horrible experience led to a series of weird issues.
Each dragging her farther and farther from understanding and being reached.
It took me 63 years to come to terms with what was forgotten 55 years ago.
It took me until last week to break the weirdness which surrounded me!
Just as it had surrounded her.
Things that no would believe, easily written off as fantasy or mental health issues!
But in reality, demonically directed by outside influences!

So, I settled down with her son=in-law.
I did not know him well.
But he shared with me the story of her last hours.
In tears, gasping for breath, the story was told.
So, I had to ask, was there any proof this was real.

His reply was that her last words were to ask for my forgiveness
(of  MANY wrongs done me!).
But, I always extended her forgiveness due to understanding her pain.
( She also cursed her ex-husband,  now that was more like her!)
He left and went out to get drunk.

I prayed and sought to understand.
I do not understand humans.
I know motives.
I can see what no one else can see.
I am cursed with what I do not understand.

I spent five days packing up her life.
Her son was able to handle as much as he could by phone.

And now I fully understand how she ended up where she did.
I understand how her family was broken.
I understand  how I was broken and incredibly stupid.
Yeah better late than never I guess!

I will try and type up something more in-depth for you after dialysis tomorrow.
But, I am a basket case, so we will see.

But, make no mistake, freedom and peace are credible when you have never known either!

US Postal non-Service

The US Postal System continues to deteriorate it seems!

Last week I got a bill, sent in town even!, that arrived 8 months after it was sent!
8 months!
Even a cripple like me could have walked that distance a few hundred times!

Mind you this after my mailman actually being caught throwing away my mail!
Postal drivers whom have snapped my mailbox stand off three times at the ground level due to reckless driving, not just bad driving.  Turned out the guy had a drinking problem!
And if you complain, well a sledge hammer is taken to your box!
Really?

Of course, they take NO responsibility for their employees behavior.
In Federal court this is called racketeering and terrorism - unless you are a unionized Federal employee it seems.

And now, I sent a check to a second cousin, in college in California, to go on a missions trip - two weeks ago.  No sign of the check .....

So, now off to walk to the post office to sent it via some method that requires a signature.
SIGH!
I bet Kenya has a more reliable postal service.

South Africa

South Africa, as it exists today, is largely the product of ill educated Americans blackmailing and bribing to create what was supposed to be a democratic nation - in place of the white-centric totalitarian government those in power in America, wanted out!

Mind you, every time America has mettled in other countries politics - it has backfired.  But, never condemn the naively presumptuous for their continued optimism ..... their voters are not the ones being butchered.  And collateral damage is just that, a statistic!

Back in 1965, camping my way through Spain and into Portugal, I kept seeing the same faces - so finally had to ask whom they were.  They turned out to be a group of college students on vacation from South Africa.  Now South Africa was in the news quite a bit in the German news, so I took them straight into examination of very hard questions.  And they realized I was thinking my way through what I had read and heard.

I learned about the ill conceived policy of apartheid.  The politics of those in power and came to understand that these white young men were just as trapped by these policies as the native and immigrant populations were!  And the same could be said for the Rhodesians I met as well!

As history has shown, Rhodesia fell to a tribal based communist army and the bloodshed was appalling!  To this day, the white fortresses have successfully held off the entrenched army for decades.  And ever so often an enclave surrenders with guarantees of safe passage.  I have only heard of once that passage was not being given safety and both sides suffered appalling losses!

Of course this did not happen in South Africa, thanks in part to an iron fisted will of the President whom sought healing for the nation.  And this held for 25 years .... but now, the silent Christian ruler is dead and a tribal war is erupting as it did in Rhodesia.  You can call it anyway you want but it really boils down to pagans vs Christians.  You might remember how costly that battle was in Rome, certainly over 1,000,000 killed.  In Rhodesia, perhaps around 500,000 initially - many, many more across time.  Now South African Christians have been in a physical battle for a year!

Expect a mass exodus of up to 3,000,000 at first and another 5,000,000 casualties and escapees by end of next year.
Expect a bloodbath.

And note, it is not just whites being attacked, it is any Christian.  But, you really do not want to be white or mixed race at this time either!

So, powerless, I sit and listen, and contemplate the future of my grandchildren, as the world slowly turns upon Christians .....

Yet you, like I, are powerful if we would just get down on our knees and pray.
Seriously, it is time to take sides with prayer.
God can and does do wonders if we are just willing to ask according to His will in all matters.

Grace

One of those touchy topics where you would be darn tested to find in the Bible, and yet it is a valid doctrine.
So, no direct references to talk from.

Read Genesis 1

What Is It?
"God's Riches At Christ's Expense"
But this limits Grace to the cross only!

"Undeserved love (goodness, kindness, forgiveness, etc)
"Love when you are unlovable."
"One way love - you have nothing to offer in return."

There are no demands made upon you to do anything for it.
Offered to everyone, no matter their/yours/my sin!

Where is it found?
The proof of Grace is found throughout the Bible.
In the characters of the greats of the Bible.
We find it in stories, not in doctrine.
Think of Samson, David, Paul, Peter, etc!
All were just like you and me.
All failed.
All were given Grace.
None of them deserved it.

Seen In A Garden
Creation left us with variety.
Not for God's pleasure, but ours.
We were given control of, not for destruction, but to enjoy.
All of life can be viewed as a gift of God.

And Grace makes religion compassionate!