So, Saturday's unexpected breakage was far worse than I could have imagined. I was lucky I had a splint already. I was lucky that the caller before me had cancelled their appointment with the foot doc. I was further lucky that the surgeon had a cancellation exactly when I was ready and could allow for drive time (and limp time!). My luck held out as the hospital bay had just had a cancellation as well on April 8.
The original break back in November of 2013 was a split between the foot and the heel, which allowed the foot to move 1.5 inches up the leg. Then it shattered as did the ankle. Now the angle of the foot has put to much stress on the first joints of the toes, which have now broken. Yeah, ouch.
I know my detractors are doing handstands in joy, but we are seeing a series of miracles here. From busy doctor schedules to operation bays, that alone is amazing. But, when you are talking a compound fracturing of the foot - every bit helps.
Yeah, April 8 will be the date of the reconstructive surgery.
It will also be the end of my life for at least three months. BORING! So, stocking up on books and cleaning to set up a painting station by my bed. Thinking also of working on my recipe collection
March 31, 2015
March 30, 2015
Computer Down and Injuries
Yes, Kris' little Acer is have problems - AGAIN!
Since the last restore it has been touch and go but I stuck with it and finally on last Monday had a completely functional and clean computer - then I took it with me Tuesday morning.
I rarely carry my little guy around with me, but I wanted to reference some stuff on it for a lecture I was to give. And silly me, I had set the network to auto attach to WANs when discovered. I am thinking Starbucks or maybe the local library when I can get free attachment for playing on the internet - for like doing these posts.
Well, you have already seen the error I made, my machine did an auto attachment and even though I did nothing on the internet, the machine was happily downloading virus after virus after virus at the rate of about 6 per second! I even have a firewall! I was so unhappy as I read through the log file of the firewall - it blocked thousands of hits but some still were not blocked!
GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!
So, computer goes down last Friday, for yet another rebuild, and hopefully I will get it right this time!
If no other posts show up this week, I do apologize, I am still down in that event....
*************
In the end, I did get my little 'puter almost complete by the end of the weekend. It is Sunday and 11 pm as I type this but it is still attempting to attach a printer. Sigh ..
However, Saturday night also at 11:00 pm, I got up to call it a night and CRACK! I took one step and foot broke in a manner it has never done! Oh the pain!
Well, I can no longer walk or even stand. Dutchman was howling with laughter today at my attempt to use a urinal while balanced on one foot! A very mean man! But he needed a laugh it has been a very hard year so far on him!
Anyway, I am spending Monday with my various foot surgeons to see if my reconstruction can occur sooner - like next week! We will see.....
:(
Since the last restore it has been touch and go but I stuck with it and finally on last Monday had a completely functional and clean computer - then I took it with me Tuesday morning.
I rarely carry my little guy around with me, but I wanted to reference some stuff on it for a lecture I was to give. And silly me, I had set the network to auto attach to WANs when discovered. I am thinking Starbucks or maybe the local library when I can get free attachment for playing on the internet - for like doing these posts.
Well, you have already seen the error I made, my machine did an auto attachment and even though I did nothing on the internet, the machine was happily downloading virus after virus after virus at the rate of about 6 per second! I even have a firewall! I was so unhappy as I read through the log file of the firewall - it blocked thousands of hits but some still were not blocked!
GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!
So, computer goes down last Friday, for yet another rebuild, and hopefully I will get it right this time!
If no other posts show up this week, I do apologize, I am still down in that event....
*************
In the end, I did get my little 'puter almost complete by the end of the weekend. It is Sunday and 11 pm as I type this but it is still attempting to attach a printer. Sigh ..
However, Saturday night also at 11:00 pm, I got up to call it a night and CRACK! I took one step and foot broke in a manner it has never done! Oh the pain!
Well, I can no longer walk or even stand. Dutchman was howling with laughter today at my attempt to use a urinal while balanced on one foot! A very mean man! But he needed a laugh it has been a very hard year so far on him!
Anyway, I am spending Monday with my various foot surgeons to see if my reconstruction can occur sooner - like next week! We will see.....
:(
March 28, 2015
March 27, 2015
The Tongue
James 3, one hard chapter to follow ...
Several condemning concepts ...
Pretty much it covers all Christians ...
Take a moment and read James 3, no I am not going to do a verse by verse thought process here but just concepts that seem to standout, take it out of it Western Theology Cult meaning and put it back into its Oriental (Hebrew) meaning (if I am lucky).
Teachers are to be judged harsher
Well that just makes everyone want to line up to be a teacher now doesn't!
In the context of the picture we have of the time: every village with ten or more Jews, was required to support a Synagog. A Rabbi (teacher) had to be there.
For the Christian, there was a witness, an apostle, a missionary whom started a house church if there was no synagog to attend and teach at.
Remember Christianity is Judaism, only the Christian believers were eventually thrown out.
So, teachers existed in both the Jewish and early Christian models but the teachers could be a problem. I have no doubt that what James was writing about was the rise of self seeking men, whom would corrupt the faith for financial gain. Not so unlike today - a disease throughout the "christian" industry/entertainment/media/etc! And though gaining in popularity, there are still some solid Christian witnesses out there teaching, they are just being drowned out by the prosperity cult.
So, Kris the Christian fails, big deal.
Kris the teacher fails, and now all of those whom were instructed by me have cause to give thought to the reality of Christianity. After-all, if Kris is a HYPOCRITE and can not live up to the Christian standard - why should I?!?!?!?!?
So, Kris the Pastor fails, whoops!
Now we are impacting communities, we are impacted an extended realm of influence! Your failure could loom so large that you are going to get national or international coverage for it!
And the list of large of those whom have acquired failure at a national and international level!
Every wonder why we live in the Post-Christian Age? Because there are those whom would be pastors and teachers, whom were unqualified from the start but it was only their public disgrace which removed them from causing more damage in God's name ...
But, the same could be said for all of the roles/responsibility/gifts of the Spirit - all of them can be abused for personal gain and made to become an embarrassment to God.
And the tongue - the source of the problem for the teacher:
Boosting - "i am so great", making it about you and not God
Evil - your intention in what you are saying is do wrong for you or others
Poison - your teaching can turn people away from God, from God-liness,
It sets the course of your life.
And like my father, you can be trapped by your lies and never able to life in truth ever again ...
So, thinking on the tongue:
1 Timothy 5:13 Idle words aka Gossip
Romans 1:29 Wickedness, Gossip
Proverbs 26:22 Whisperer, Rumors
2 Timothy 2:16-17 Groundless chatter, Rummors/Gossip/Stupidity
The tongue ... many uses for good but destructive in our associations with others and deadly in our walk before God.
Several condemning concepts ...
Pretty much it covers all Christians ...
Take a moment and read James 3, no I am not going to do a verse by verse thought process here but just concepts that seem to standout, take it out of it Western Theology Cult meaning and put it back into its Oriental (Hebrew) meaning (if I am lucky).
Teachers are to be judged harsher
Well that just makes everyone want to line up to be a teacher now doesn't!
In the context of the picture we have of the time: every village with ten or more Jews, was required to support a Synagog. A Rabbi (teacher) had to be there.
For the Christian, there was a witness, an apostle, a missionary whom started a house church if there was no synagog to attend and teach at.
Remember Christianity is Judaism, only the Christian believers were eventually thrown out.
So, teachers existed in both the Jewish and early Christian models but the teachers could be a problem. I have no doubt that what James was writing about was the rise of self seeking men, whom would corrupt the faith for financial gain. Not so unlike today - a disease throughout the "christian" industry/entertainment/media/etc! And though gaining in popularity, there are still some solid Christian witnesses out there teaching, they are just being drowned out by the prosperity cult.
So, Kris the Christian fails, big deal.
Kris the teacher fails, and now all of those whom were instructed by me have cause to give thought to the reality of Christianity. After-all, if Kris is a HYPOCRITE and can not live up to the Christian standard - why should I?!?!?!?!?
So, Kris the Pastor fails, whoops!
Now we are impacting communities, we are impacted an extended realm of influence! Your failure could loom so large that you are going to get national or international coverage for it!
And the list of large of those whom have acquired failure at a national and international level!
Every wonder why we live in the Post-Christian Age? Because there are those whom would be pastors and teachers, whom were unqualified from the start but it was only their public disgrace which removed them from causing more damage in God's name ...
But, the same could be said for all of the roles/responsibility/gifts of the Spirit - all of them can be abused for personal gain and made to become an embarrassment to God.
And the tongue - the source of the problem for the teacher:
Boosting - "i am so great", making it about you and not God
Evil - your intention in what you are saying is do wrong for you or others
Poison - your teaching can turn people away from God, from God-liness,
It sets the course of your life.
And like my father, you can be trapped by your lies and never able to life in truth ever again ...
So, thinking on the tongue:
1 Timothy 5:13 Idle words aka Gossip
Romans 1:29 Wickedness, Gossip
Proverbs 26:22 Whisperer, Rumors
2 Timothy 2:16-17 Groundless chatter, Rummors/Gossip/Stupidity
The tongue ... many uses for good but destructive in our associations with others and deadly in our walk before God.
March 26, 2015
Thinking
I think quite often on the destruction of Jerusalem. God handed His own chosen people, the Hebrew people, over to false gods, brutal tyranny and erased practiced Judaism from the face of the Earth.
Exactly how mad was He at them? Pretty darn mad that is for sure!
And they had the real God on their side but worshipped false gods in his temple, and they preyed upon their neighbors (other Jews) for wealth, and they stole from the poor, and they ignored the widows, and they ignored the plight of the orphan, and ....
We are just like then in oh, so many ways!
But, hey, people are people, right? I mean, we all fall short, we all sin, we all disappoint God and we are not all that bad, right?
... Right ... ? Hello God, right ... ?
And I think on Daniel 9:1-20, Jeremiah 25:11, and so many more verses.
God has a breaking point, He forgives, He gives chances, and this cycle seems to endlessly repeat until ... something gives. A measure of sin is met, the heart of man never considers his Creator any more, every thought, every action is only on sin. And God moves suddenly, swiftly, assuredly against those whom would call themselves by His name and yet then tarnish His name with their - er - "excesses" (face it sin!).
Jeremiah: "this whole land will be a desolation and a horror ..."
Ouch! God will make His promised land cursed and a place of death.
Yet, for as sure as God's judgement is, He held out to His people in Jeremiah 29 - hope that He will hear them again and will act in their behalf!
I think about parallels in history: the Hebrew people, whom had it all with God; the Christian whom has it all with God. A Hebrew people sold out in sin and through corrupt leadership a nation in sin. And I think about western culture ... wait a minute I lost my thought there, how are WE any different than those Hebrews whom felt the wrath of God via the nooses of the Assyrian or bronze bolts of the Scythian archers? How different are we from those, such as Daniel and his three friends, led to captivity in Babylon with nooses around their necks! - a very long walk for a teenage!
Yet Daniel and his, kept their faith with them! And we can keep our faith in the face of overwhelming odds!
Daniel witnessed those whom thought they controlled him. Just as we should be doing to ALL whom come in contact with us!
I am sure they were uncertain at the time. And I know all of us doubt, but like Daniel we have to stand on proven ground!
And I often then close my eyes pondering ... why has God not moved against this culture, this country, this state, this city, this unworthy man? How much worse could Israel and Judea have been .... ? And I nod off secure in knowing I am His, no matter the day, no matter those surrounding me, no matter ....
Exactly how mad was He at them? Pretty darn mad that is for sure!
And they had the real God on their side but worshipped false gods in his temple, and they preyed upon their neighbors (other Jews) for wealth, and they stole from the poor, and they ignored the widows, and they ignored the plight of the orphan, and ....
We are just like then in oh, so many ways!
But, hey, people are people, right? I mean, we all fall short, we all sin, we all disappoint God and we are not all that bad, right?
... Right ... ? Hello God, right ... ?
And I think on Daniel 9:1-20, Jeremiah 25:11, and so many more verses.
God has a breaking point, He forgives, He gives chances, and this cycle seems to endlessly repeat until ... something gives. A measure of sin is met, the heart of man never considers his Creator any more, every thought, every action is only on sin. And God moves suddenly, swiftly, assuredly against those whom would call themselves by His name and yet then tarnish His name with their - er - "excesses" (face it sin!).
Jeremiah: "this whole land will be a desolation and a horror ..."
Ouch! God will make His promised land cursed and a place of death.
Yet, for as sure as God's judgement is, He held out to His people in Jeremiah 29 - hope that He will hear them again and will act in their behalf!
I think about parallels in history: the Hebrew people, whom had it all with God; the Christian whom has it all with God. A Hebrew people sold out in sin and through corrupt leadership a nation in sin. And I think about western culture ... wait a minute I lost my thought there, how are WE any different than those Hebrews whom felt the wrath of God via the nooses of the Assyrian or bronze bolts of the Scythian archers? How different are we from those, such as Daniel and his three friends, led to captivity in Babylon with nooses around their necks! - a very long walk for a teenage!
Yet Daniel and his, kept their faith with them! And we can keep our faith in the face of overwhelming odds!
Daniel witnessed those whom thought they controlled him. Just as we should be doing to ALL whom come in contact with us!
I am sure they were uncertain at the time. And I know all of us doubt, but like Daniel we have to stand on proven ground!
And I often then close my eyes pondering ... why has God not moved against this culture, this country, this state, this city, this unworthy man? How much worse could Israel and Judea have been .... ? And I nod off secure in knowing I am His, no matter the day, no matter those surrounding me, no matter ....
March 25, 2015
Noted In Passing
This would have been Monday's post, however due to breaking my foot, yet again, I was unable to do so and so what you saw was what I had done on Thursday.
I had crossed paths with Kyra many decades ago, back when I first had thought of adopting. I had been interested in a black brother and sister, however the thought that a "white" would be willing to adopt black children was apparently a first and I was turned down. Seems American Indian is also considered "white", especially when your mother (half Indian) was strawberry blonde and blue-eyed! I could sort of understand the issue - I do look white, I am European, but that was just plain racist by the US Government. My first eye opener that racism still does exist, is sponsored by the US Government and welfare of children is not the issue - skin color is.
Kyra and her husband, got the kids I had been wanting to adopt. They were just as "white" as me, only Kyra was more Indian - in theory, not genetic reality however. But, we are talking politics here. Her husband would be unnoticeable in Dublin. Licked my wounds, stayed in touch with them, a long distance friend of the family.
She was no one, so unknown by most there are no public photo's of her. A wife, a mother of five, someone whom knew my name and would said "Hi" anytime she saw me. Which alone makes her stand out!
A decade ago Kyra was injured at her job with the school district, took a hard blow to the head from which she never was able to recover. Their policy is to reassign you to a comparable job to accommodate your injury. So they made her a math teacher. Unfortunately, pre-injury Kyra would not add, post-injury was even less qualified - she could barely talk! So was fired. Yeah, really good policy there in dealing with the disabled.
Family went down a rat hole, kids traumatized and turning to drugs and other societal issues. Sigh.
Her life was short, many of us did what we could to help, but what was needed could not be paid for thanks to the local government's definition of disabled. (Oh, she can feed herself? Well go get a job! Never mind she could not communicate, drive or even dress ... grrrrrrrr!)
And she was a neat lady. I have missed her for a decade now, because no one has been home, but even if just a shell, she had been a friend. Although said far too often, and with the context Kyra had to deal with, she really is better off in the next life, without pain and suffering. But not for those whom loved her.
The injustices of this world and the games it plays to hold itself free of responsible amaze me. "Bob" the local meth user gets more from the local government than someone whom was injured on the job. I guess if she could have thrown rocks through local business windows at night and used the local library as a toilet - she could have gotten the help she desperately needed ... was owed ... and denied.
March 24, 2015
The Attacks Continue
If I was an observer, I would be buying popcorn right now! I mean really, it is getting to be quite a show around me!
Satan has upped the ante and hit me on four different fronts from late Sunday night through Monday morning. Each of them has been quite devastating in their ability to target weakness and hit hard - which is how I know this is Satan. God does not need to work this way and no single human (or even a group) could so randomly hit at virtually the same time and so pointedly. Luckily, I have been on pretty good footing in my walk with God, a few stumbles along the way but over all, pretty good.
A motivational speaker I heard back in the 1970's was talking about how you can deal with problems at work, if your family life is solid. Conversely, you can take a family hit, if your career is solid. But, an attack on both, simultaneously and you are going to go down. Just that simple. I thought that was interesting ...
For weeks now there have been annoying problems constantly, but of no real consequence, at least to me.
And the jabs started hitting closer to home last week. I am holding my breath, but not biting on the lure.
I can see Satan is behind this, it wants me to become angry - because then I will be quite un-Godly in my reactions.
Not to say, those reactions are not warranted, but the basis is what matters to God, my motivation.
Then on Wednesday, it got personal.
I have a dread, a very real, very big dread, sorry no hints, it is something God has to handle.
And the Whisperer started nibbling my ear about that dread, but I stood as best I can, for it is very real.
Then came the death of an old acquaintance. That one hurt.
The heel of my broken foot and broken ankle, decided it needed to break now as well.
Then came violent illness, yes, I need to die, I have no will left to live - this has gone on too long!
But wait! We have not attacked what Kris does for any sense of self value!
Monday morning took care of that one! With the best of intentions, I was trashed from top to bottom, inside and out, no piece of me was left unattacked. I did my best to make the meeting productive, but it kept swinging back to "it is all about Kris and how horrible you are!". It was one of those amazing moments when you realize that God is using a situation, just the same way that Satan is using this man trashing me. And yes, he is a very Godly man, so amazing to see how he was being used so unknowingly. Again no hints here, where my self value lay hidden is beyond almost all's reach .. except for this one man whom runs the business I am trying to help. Yeah, his business is in trouble and though based on Scripture, I am not sure it is faith in God they cling to.
Just the trashing is enough for everyone I have ever known to throw it back into his face. I am not his problem, the problem is far more basic but I am the short timer and short timers have always gotten the short stick in the end. Compound this with all else that has gone on and yeah, I know people whom cracked. I am not saying here, Kris is great in any regard, it is just that my faith is in God and His ability to lead me through all of these challenges ... if I can be faithful and find strength I no longer possess. Sigh.
Back home, to think and brood - well no time for that as the dog had diarrhea and three rooms of the house now need cleaned, by a man on crutches, whom can not exactly bend over ...... ENOUGH! It is over, I am so finished, I have nothing left to attack!
And now this is at the point I need prayer: my race is run, I have nothing left in me, all I have is faith in God and one person. I am fairly certain that person is about to get whacked next and I have been praying for their protection for the past month. Whatever the basis of this attack, it is unrelenting and I expect worse to come. Yeah, later everyone will feel stupid and I will just be more broken than I currently am. Strong in my faith, sucking wind in all other regards.
... sigh ...
As a late Monday update, it seems my dread is perhaps more realistic than imagined. I am sure it is all my fault, or it is not me at all, or whatever. In any event, I am powerless to change events already in play, I only hope this goes as God would desire ... (God's Determinative vs Permissive Will problem here)
Three years ago that highway stretched before me and I was willing to walk it to the end, to the doom I knew awaited there. Now, I can not even walk, the highway is still there, as is the doom. Today, I would gladly take that step, if I could, but now out of sense of hopelessness and crushing defeat.
Satan has upped the ante and hit me on four different fronts from late Sunday night through Monday morning. Each of them has been quite devastating in their ability to target weakness and hit hard - which is how I know this is Satan. God does not need to work this way and no single human (or even a group) could so randomly hit at virtually the same time and so pointedly. Luckily, I have been on pretty good footing in my walk with God, a few stumbles along the way but over all, pretty good.
A motivational speaker I heard back in the 1970's was talking about how you can deal with problems at work, if your family life is solid. Conversely, you can take a family hit, if your career is solid. But, an attack on both, simultaneously and you are going to go down. Just that simple. I thought that was interesting ...
For weeks now there have been annoying problems constantly, but of no real consequence, at least to me.
And the jabs started hitting closer to home last week. I am holding my breath, but not biting on the lure.
I can see Satan is behind this, it wants me to become angry - because then I will be quite un-Godly in my reactions.
Not to say, those reactions are not warranted, but the basis is what matters to God, my motivation.
Then on Wednesday, it got personal.
I have a dread, a very real, very big dread, sorry no hints, it is something God has to handle.
And the Whisperer started nibbling my ear about that dread, but I stood as best I can, for it is very real.
Then came the death of an old acquaintance. That one hurt.
The heel of my broken foot and broken ankle, decided it needed to break now as well.
Then came violent illness, yes, I need to die, I have no will left to live - this has gone on too long!
But wait! We have not attacked what Kris does for any sense of self value!
Monday morning took care of that one! With the best of intentions, I was trashed from top to bottom, inside and out, no piece of me was left unattacked. I did my best to make the meeting productive, but it kept swinging back to "it is all about Kris and how horrible you are!". It was one of those amazing moments when you realize that God is using a situation, just the same way that Satan is using this man trashing me. And yes, he is a very Godly man, so amazing to see how he was being used so unknowingly. Again no hints here, where my self value lay hidden is beyond almost all's reach .. except for this one man whom runs the business I am trying to help. Yeah, his business is in trouble and though based on Scripture, I am not sure it is faith in God they cling to.
Just the trashing is enough for everyone I have ever known to throw it back into his face. I am not his problem, the problem is far more basic but I am the short timer and short timers have always gotten the short stick in the end. Compound this with all else that has gone on and yeah, I know people whom cracked. I am not saying here, Kris is great in any regard, it is just that my faith is in God and His ability to lead me through all of these challenges ... if I can be faithful and find strength I no longer possess. Sigh.
Back home, to think and brood - well no time for that as the dog had diarrhea and three rooms of the house now need cleaned, by a man on crutches, whom can not exactly bend over ...... ENOUGH! It is over, I am so finished, I have nothing left to attack!
And now this is at the point I need prayer: my race is run, I have nothing left in me, all I have is faith in God and one person. I am fairly certain that person is about to get whacked next and I have been praying for their protection for the past month. Whatever the basis of this attack, it is unrelenting and I expect worse to come. Yeah, later everyone will feel stupid and I will just be more broken than I currently am. Strong in my faith, sucking wind in all other regards.
... sigh ...
As a late Monday update, it seems my dread is perhaps more realistic than imagined. I am sure it is all my fault, or it is not me at all, or whatever. In any event, I am powerless to change events already in play, I only hope this goes as God would desire ... (God's Determinative vs Permissive Will problem here)
Three years ago that highway stretched before me and I was willing to walk it to the end, to the doom I knew awaited there. Now, I can not even walk, the highway is still there, as is the doom. Today, I would gladly take that step, if I could, but now out of sense of hopelessness and crushing defeat.
March 23, 2015
Anger
(re-reading this several days later - and oh my gosh! You would not realize that English is my third language! Oh heavens! My apologies! I hope I get it cleaned up correctly this time!)
I have one area of sin I am victim to: pride.
It is subtle.
It is when I put myself ahead of God in what I am doing..
It is never observed until I find I have been tripped up by Satan.
Then, well, yeah, I have to repent and try harder for no new next time.
I do not talk about my pre-Christian life, there is very little to say of any value to anyone.
I was quite simply the most violent person you have never been able to even imagine.
Sorry, Hollywood is not going to be able to help you here.
Killer Elite, came even close to the level of violence I am referring to here.
And violence was triggered back then by my reaction of anger. Note: not an emotion of anger.
Emotional anger is consuming until it is vented.
Reactionary anger is there, then it is not, it has a trigger, it is not a force.
And that trigger has always been injustice for me.
Show me an injustice, I will show you a victim in the making. Pure and simple.
And that was how my private life and early military experience went.
And the US Government was happy then, but just wait until my book is published !!!!!
I mentioned across the past weeks that Satan has been banging on me like there is no tomorrow!
And I could not figure out why.
Then I had a day straight out of the Twilight Zone.
Everything was weird, nothing normal was happening, and I realized - in time - Satan was trying to get me to react in anger to all that was befallen me.
Now understanding, I was able to succeed in putting this behind me.
I was not going to be falling prey to anger again, and the past it drags forward each time.
(Yeah, later Satan nailed me with Pride yet again ... sigh ... start over, AGAIN!)
So last week I was at an awards presentation for some Christian kids - and - well - all @#$% was to break lose over the disappointment expressed by some. In fact it grew into a mini riot as 20 kids started trashing things! Really? And ANGER rose up in me and I exploded.
I hit a table so hard that kids, heck parents, all sat down instantly and there was utter quiet. And, none to quietly I lashed out at them with a lecture concerning respect ...
I hear myself talking, but it is not me, hearing words I can remember from my discipleship back in the Hutterite Community and I can see that I am angry but it is not a bad anger that is going to lead to sin - it is ultimately calling the kids and adults to repent.
Two verses came to mind and I covered them in-depth, how they affected themselves, how they were damaging others and in violation of Jesus direct words .....
The easiest summation is that if you do not respect yourself, you will never be able to respect others.
If you can not show respect to others, no one will ever respect you.
The Christian life you are called to is to put the other first - not you. Nothing in life is about you!
Utter silence followed ...
Then an 8th grade girl says, "Do you mean to tell me that life is about my being able to put others before me and my wants and desires?"
She turns and looks that the others, "Is that stupidest thing you have ever heard or what?"
And all went their way.
So, I went out of my way to contact this group and see where they were a day later.
Averted eyes, very quiet, respectful.
Hmmmm, so there is a kind of anger which is good, if used by God to call His own into account.
Cool ...
I have one area of sin I am victim to: pride.
It is subtle.
It is when I put myself ahead of God in what I am doing..
It is never observed until I find I have been tripped up by Satan.
Then, well, yeah, I have to repent and try harder for no new next time.
I do not talk about my pre-Christian life, there is very little to say of any value to anyone.
I was quite simply the most violent person you have never been able to even imagine.
Sorry, Hollywood is not going to be able to help you here.
Killer Elite, came even close to the level of violence I am referring to here.
And violence was triggered back then by my reaction of anger. Note: not an emotion of anger.
Emotional anger is consuming until it is vented.
Reactionary anger is there, then it is not, it has a trigger, it is not a force.
And that trigger has always been injustice for me.
Show me an injustice, I will show you a victim in the making. Pure and simple.
And that was how my private life and early military experience went.
And the US Government was happy then, but just wait until my book is published !!!!!
I mentioned across the past weeks that Satan has been banging on me like there is no tomorrow!
And I could not figure out why.
Then I had a day straight out of the Twilight Zone.
Everything was weird, nothing normal was happening, and I realized - in time - Satan was trying to get me to react in anger to all that was befallen me.
Now understanding, I was able to succeed in putting this behind me.
I was not going to be falling prey to anger again, and the past it drags forward each time.
(Yeah, later Satan nailed me with Pride yet again ... sigh ... start over, AGAIN!)
So last week I was at an awards presentation for some Christian kids - and - well - all @#$% was to break lose over the disappointment expressed by some. In fact it grew into a mini riot as 20 kids started trashing things! Really? And ANGER rose up in me and I exploded.
I hit a table so hard that kids, heck parents, all sat down instantly and there was utter quiet. And, none to quietly I lashed out at them with a lecture concerning respect ...
I hear myself talking, but it is not me, hearing words I can remember from my discipleship back in the Hutterite Community and I can see that I am angry but it is not a bad anger that is going to lead to sin - it is ultimately calling the kids and adults to repent.
Two verses came to mind and I covered them in-depth, how they affected themselves, how they were damaging others and in violation of Jesus direct words .....
Mark 12:31
31 The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.”Luke 6:31
31 Do to others as you would have them do to you.The easiest summation is that if you do not respect yourself, you will never be able to respect others.
If you can not show respect to others, no one will ever respect you.
The Christian life you are called to is to put the other first - not you. Nothing in life is about you!
Utter silence followed ...
Then an 8th grade girl says, "Do you mean to tell me that life is about my being able to put others before me and my wants and desires?"
She turns and looks that the others, "Is that stupidest thing you have ever heard or what?"
And all went their way.
So, I went out of my way to contact this group and see where they were a day later.
Averted eyes, very quiet, respectful.
Hmmmm, so there is a kind of anger which is good, if used by God to call His own into account.
Cool ...
March 21, 2015
Musical Saturday Morning
Today' musical selection has got to be one of the oddest (worse?) selections from the 1990s!
My Oldest Daughter was enthralled by Irina Sluskaya, the Russia female skater. They were eventually to meet, a favor I still owe her for (I still Kelly one too).
One of Sluskayas numbers was done with a western flair and always popular with the crowds. Of course, OD was also an ice skater, like her heroine, and did a number once to Cotton Eye Joe as well ...
My Oldest Daughter was enthralled by Irina Sluskaya, the Russia female skater. They were eventually to meet, a favor I still owe her for (I still Kelly one too).
One of Sluskayas numbers was done with a western flair and always popular with the crowds. Of course, OD was also an ice skater, like her heroine, and did a number once to Cotton Eye Joe as well ...
March 20, 2015
Computers!
ARGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!
I may have worked with computers since 1972, but I have grown to hate Micro-Squish!
So computer went into update mode on Wednesday morning and that was it ..... Finally last night I killed the update, which is none too easy on a a Microsoft Computer operating system. So did manage to cancel their bad updating service and I was right, it had gone into a loop and was doing nothing for hours on end. Not reading anything off of the internet, not writing anything, not reading thing.
But, interestingly, when I had recovered my operating system - the virus which has plagued my computer - was GONE! Now, I am amazed by that one.
So, computer is back up in time to post a horrible song for tomorrow!
LOL!
I may have worked with computers since 1972, but I have grown to hate Micro-Squish!
So computer went into update mode on Wednesday morning and that was it ..... Finally last night I killed the update, which is none too easy on a a Microsoft Computer operating system. So did manage to cancel their bad updating service and I was right, it had gone into a loop and was doing nothing for hours on end. Not reading anything off of the internet, not writing anything, not reading thing.
But, interestingly, when I had recovered my operating system - the virus which has plagued my computer - was GONE! Now, I am amazed by that one.
So, computer is back up in time to post a horrible song for tomorrow!
LOL!
March 19, 2015
Fasting
I was driving along, listening to the local Christian radio station, when the show had a guest come on to discuss the power of fasting.
"Power?", I thought. Hmmm, may as well as pull over and listen!
Now the show was by Liberty University, don't care who founded it, don't care who runs it, I do care that if they are invading my airwaves they are being wholly Bible based.
Now we have many examples of fasting:
Really?
Well, all of this radio show's remarks concerning Liberty University do fit with seeking God to answer prayer. However, the way the testimonies ran, well yeah, we are talking Christian superstition here!
If you -
If only -
You have to -
Each of these precursors to a statement tell you that you are about to be hit by a Christian superstition and it is time to ignore the rest this person has to say.
God is incapable of starting up a university?
God is incapable of raising money?
God is incapable of raising up a building?
God is incapable of raising up a student body?
God is sovereign, He can and will do as He pleases:
I have fasted for decades as a remembrance, a celebration if you will, of the first miracle I witnessed as a new Christian.
When I really need to know God's will.
When I am in need of protection and guidance
When I am asked to help another
Funny, my Bible does not point out to me that I need to fast to buy a house, or really do anything in normal life, it is the extraordinary we fast concerning. That is not to say that these men whom started this university were not in need of fasting to know God's will, they may very well have needed to. But, they carried the conversation beyond faith and into the last of superstition.
And more so, Jesus condemned the Pharisees and their "long faces" (they were fasting and wanted all to know it!) for being showmen and not humble before God.
So you decide, but if you are fasting to get God to do what you want him to do, well come to superstition and expect Satan to answer as soon as possible in order to drive you further away from faith.
"Power?", I thought. Hmmm, may as well as pull over and listen!
Now the show was by Liberty University, don't care who founded it, don't care who runs it, I do care that if they are invading my airwaves they are being wholly Bible based.
Now we have many examples of fasting:
- It was widely practiced, at God's command, by the Jews and made law by the Hebrews. (difference is one is religious, the other racial)
- Fasting was done in remembrance of something important.
- Fasting was to free up your day to concentrate on God during the Sabbath.
- Fasting and prayer went hand in hand when petitioning God to answer prayer (remember NO is the most common answer in our egomaniacal culture!).
- Jesus told the Apostles that some situations can only be overcome through fasting and prayer
- God sells houses, if you fast.
- God finds you money, if you fast.
- God will build your school, if you fast.
- God will fill your school with students, if you fast.
- God will bless your marriage, if you fast together on these examples!
Really?
Well, all of this radio show's remarks concerning Liberty University do fit with seeking God to answer prayer. However, the way the testimonies ran, well yeah, we are talking Christian superstition here!
If you -
If only -
You have to -
Each of these precursors to a statement tell you that you are about to be hit by a Christian superstition and it is time to ignore the rest this person has to say.
God is incapable of starting up a university?
God is incapable of raising money?
God is incapable of raising up a building?
God is incapable of raising up a student body?
God is sovereign, He can and will do as He pleases:
- With or without you
- With or without you fasting
- With or without your superstitions
I have fasted for decades as a remembrance, a celebration if you will, of the first miracle I witnessed as a new Christian.
When I really need to know God's will.
When I am in need of protection and guidance
When I am asked to help another
Funny, my Bible does not point out to me that I need to fast to buy a house, or really do anything in normal life, it is the extraordinary we fast concerning. That is not to say that these men whom started this university were not in need of fasting to know God's will, they may very well have needed to. But, they carried the conversation beyond faith and into the last of superstition.
And more so, Jesus condemned the Pharisees and their "long faces" (they were fasting and wanted all to know it!) for being showmen and not humble before God.
So you decide, but if you are fasting to get God to do what you want him to do, well come to superstition and expect Satan to answer as soon as possible in order to drive you further away from faith.
March 18, 2015
That Darn Sprain
So, went into the doctor, in essence to have them continue the process of shaving on the plantar of the foot, preparing it for surgery - no, you really do not want to know. And I brought up last Thursday accident ...
Of off to x-ray, many heads huddled in finding a conclusion: "Kris, you are wrong, you did not sprain your ankle, you broke it."
But he is smiling, "you see if you sprained it, we would have to allow the muscles to heal, but since you broke the ankle again, well it is just a few more pins and no big deal ... "
Yeah, no big deal, I wonder how much each pin is going to cost me based on that smile. $1,000 or more per pin? How many pins now? We were at at a dozen before ....
SOBBBBBBBB!!!!! My poor foot! Sigh ...
I have managed to stand now on my left foot for up to 25 minutes at a time, so that helps with what I do. I can walk one block now if I am on my right heel only - make a slip and the pain is exquisite ... :(
84 days and counting until June 10th ....
Just 84 more days until this two year disaster ends.
Healing would be good, doctors piecemeal healing okay, death by doctor would not be argued with before God by me. I just really want this to end.
June 10th is the turning point in my life, in a very big way. Healed I can return to life, messed up and I just will be cursed by injury then for life. And I worry about that one, it is not for lack of faith, for my faith in God is great, it is knowledge of what man is like and then being completely vulnerable, more so than now. It is not a scenario I relish.
Anyone want to push a cripple down the road to Argentina ... ?
Of off to x-ray, many heads huddled in finding a conclusion: "Kris, you are wrong, you did not sprain your ankle, you broke it."
But he is smiling, "you see if you sprained it, we would have to allow the muscles to heal, but since you broke the ankle again, well it is just a few more pins and no big deal ... "
Yeah, no big deal, I wonder how much each pin is going to cost me based on that smile. $1,000 or more per pin? How many pins now? We were at at a dozen before ....
SOBBBBBBBB!!!!! My poor foot! Sigh ...
I have managed to stand now on my left foot for up to 25 minutes at a time, so that helps with what I do. I can walk one block now if I am on my right heel only - make a slip and the pain is exquisite ... :(
84 days and counting until June 10th ....
Just 84 more days until this two year disaster ends.
Healing would be good, doctors piecemeal healing okay, death by doctor would not be argued with before God by me. I just really want this to end.
June 10th is the turning point in my life, in a very big way. Healed I can return to life, messed up and I just will be cursed by injury then for life. And I worry about that one, it is not for lack of faith, for my faith in God is great, it is knowledge of what man is like and then being completely vulnerable, more so than now. It is not a scenario I relish.
Anyone want to push a cripple down the road to Argentina ... ?
March 17, 2015
Questions, Questions, Questions!
So I have been having fun with the responses last Thursday's post has brought. Yes, all of the little examples are literally true, near as I can remember the wording! Yes, seemingly odd people cross my path constantly!
Yes, I was hit by a truck in 1996, actually it was two trucks. The first one launched me and my bicycle about 30 feet from a roadway shoulder - sideways to landing on a railroad crossing. I was still straddling the bicycle when I landed and was hit by the second truck. It was hardly his fault, no one expects something to fly in front of you from the right! Net result was four broken lumbars and a totaled out bicycle.
With the exception of weddings and funerals, I have always worn jeans and a tee shirt to church. You have to understand that my entire youth was spent in either a two piece or three piece suits. Wearing a tie - constantly!, was considered just normal life by my father. Yes, he might have been royalty (via his mother) but there was nothing royal about him. The hypocrisy of it was more than I could take. So, I determined, once I became a Christian, that I would never put on "airs" and wear a suit, except to show respect to those whom have died or are getting married. When confronted I usually point out that my heart is wearing a tux, but I wear jeans because I am not a hypocrite. I even had one lady offer me her dead husband's suits because he was roughly my size. I thanked her and never went over for a fitting.
I am the most complete and utter klutz the world has ever known. That is not a brag, it is just an observation. Take last night for instance. I was at the doctor's office and needed to use the toilet. So, I am walking down this hallway and someone steps out of a room just to my right as I am passing. Instinctively, I spun to my left, completing a full circle which would now have put me behind them. So, if it was an attack, I was in the better position. Unfortunately, my right foot did not pivot nor follow through and I spun my foot right off my ankle - shredded EVERYTHING! It is so bad I am going in this week for a re-evaluation of the ankle to see if I can still have surgery in June! And I had been out of my cast for three full days ... sigh ... Back in again, back in compression tubes, with ankle braces, all stuffed into a cast now.
"Doing "something" wrong ... " Well this critic of mine believed that he could do something right. Not that I am aware. We as humans do have the ability to do something right - when God is leading the way and God is doing all of the work. We are just His hands, His mouth, His tools ... Nope you are not capable of doing something right apart from him. The speaker though was going with the premise that I did not tithe and by doing so, God would suddenly stop all of life's challenges. But, I really have not given as little as a tithe ever, because I have always believed that everything I have is from God and is God's. Yes, most Christian would argue that point - but we are talking about my walk here, not theirs. So, when God says, give - I give. God does not tell me, I do nothing and by default I support Trans World Radio and their broadcasts monthly.
Hmmm, Kris and prayer ... I pray a great deal. When I am driving, when I am on the toilet, in the bath, anytime I am free to do so without disturbing others. I was struck very early on by the story of George Mueller (English spelling). He was widely known as a man of prayer. Unlike Mueller, I am not much for anyone knowing much about my relationship with God. Yeah, those whom I have discipled know I pray a lot but that would be it. It really is no one's business but God's because it is His talking to me, my talking to Him - and usually about those I am involved with ... no matter how far they roam. Prayer, I strongly suggest it for you on a moment by moment basis! It is your ONLY communication tool with the real God. As so many in my current church have said, "Oh, I take long walks in the parks and woods. That is how I get in touch with God." (That unfortunately is not the God of the universe they are talking to, it is the feel good modern age God of self. sorry...)
Of course, the 2005 fire was astonishing, could not have happened at a worse moment and for as much as others liked to claim that it showed what was wrong between me and God - He showed His many blessings through it! No one was injured, there was no smoke damage, structurally there was NO damage and it was only $600 in repairs! So, others saw a chastisement, where I saw God really pulling out the stops to minimize something that is very common to man.
In all of the comments about Thursday, it communicated to me quite a bit:
In the end, the only conclusion you can reach Biblically, is that the modern church is not the Christian Church of yesterday. It has replaced an emphasis on God, Jesus and evangelism with an emphasis on self, and when even doing something "in the name of Jesus", it is fact still self serving and all about us in the end. It is no wonder that we face the 21st century with a failed model of Christianity!
The religion which stood up to the Pax Romana and over came it, survived the onslaught of the Roman Catholic Church of the Middle Ages and survived it - albeit only in the inaccessible isles of Ireland and Scotland, survived the attempts to revive Christianity during the Reformation - was to die almost completely due to the cult of Self in the 20th and 21st centuries.
True believers stand in a unique spot before God, we face critics whom are justified in their statements, we face self serving members of churches whom know all of the right words - just not in their hearts, and there is this lost and seeking world out there whom has looked at Christianity and due to the examples they see - can not believe that this is actually the way to Salvation!
In fact, the ones I meet and talk to, are appalled by what they have seen, heard and why was it they should be believing in this disaster called Christianity again ...?
Yes, I was hit by a truck in 1996, actually it was two trucks. The first one launched me and my bicycle about 30 feet from a roadway shoulder - sideways to landing on a railroad crossing. I was still straddling the bicycle when I landed and was hit by the second truck. It was hardly his fault, no one expects something to fly in front of you from the right! Net result was four broken lumbars and a totaled out bicycle.
With the exception of weddings and funerals, I have always worn jeans and a tee shirt to church. You have to understand that my entire youth was spent in either a two piece or three piece suits. Wearing a tie - constantly!, was considered just normal life by my father. Yes, he might have been royalty (via his mother) but there was nothing royal about him. The hypocrisy of it was more than I could take. So, I determined, once I became a Christian, that I would never put on "airs" and wear a suit, except to show respect to those whom have died or are getting married. When confronted I usually point out that my heart is wearing a tux, but I wear jeans because I am not a hypocrite. I even had one lady offer me her dead husband's suits because he was roughly my size. I thanked her and never went over for a fitting.
I am the most complete and utter klutz the world has ever known. That is not a brag, it is just an observation. Take last night for instance. I was at the doctor's office and needed to use the toilet. So, I am walking down this hallway and someone steps out of a room just to my right as I am passing. Instinctively, I spun to my left, completing a full circle which would now have put me behind them. So, if it was an attack, I was in the better position. Unfortunately, my right foot did not pivot nor follow through and I spun my foot right off my ankle - shredded EVERYTHING! It is so bad I am going in this week for a re-evaluation of the ankle to see if I can still have surgery in June! And I had been out of my cast for three full days ... sigh ... Back in again, back in compression tubes, with ankle braces, all stuffed into a cast now.
"Doing "something" wrong ... " Well this critic of mine believed that he could do something right. Not that I am aware. We as humans do have the ability to do something right - when God is leading the way and God is doing all of the work. We are just His hands, His mouth, His tools ... Nope you are not capable of doing something right apart from him. The speaker though was going with the premise that I did not tithe and by doing so, God would suddenly stop all of life's challenges. But, I really have not given as little as a tithe ever, because I have always believed that everything I have is from God and is God's. Yes, most Christian would argue that point - but we are talking about my walk here, not theirs. So, when God says, give - I give. God does not tell me, I do nothing and by default I support Trans World Radio and their broadcasts monthly.
Hmmm, Kris and prayer ... I pray a great deal. When I am driving, when I am on the toilet, in the bath, anytime I am free to do so without disturbing others. I was struck very early on by the story of George Mueller (English spelling). He was widely known as a man of prayer. Unlike Mueller, I am not much for anyone knowing much about my relationship with God. Yeah, those whom I have discipled know I pray a lot but that would be it. It really is no one's business but God's because it is His talking to me, my talking to Him - and usually about those I am involved with ... no matter how far they roam. Prayer, I strongly suggest it for you on a moment by moment basis! It is your ONLY communication tool with the real God. As so many in my current church have said, "Oh, I take long walks in the parks and woods. That is how I get in touch with God." (That unfortunately is not the God of the universe they are talking to, it is the feel good modern age God of self. sorry...)
Of course, the 2005 fire was astonishing, could not have happened at a worse moment and for as much as others liked to claim that it showed what was wrong between me and God - He showed His many blessings through it! No one was injured, there was no smoke damage, structurally there was NO damage and it was only $600 in repairs! So, others saw a chastisement, where I saw God really pulling out the stops to minimize something that is very common to man.
In all of the comments about Thursday, it communicated to me quite a bit:
- Superstition is everywhere in the Church
- Even strong Christians can be superstitious
- People you respect can be utterly wrong in all regards
- God does not work the way today's church believes
- People can be misled easily
- People pay far too much attention to others, rather than themselves
In the end, the only conclusion you can reach Biblically, is that the modern church is not the Christian Church of yesterday. It has replaced an emphasis on God, Jesus and evangelism with an emphasis on self, and when even doing something "in the name of Jesus", it is fact still self serving and all about us in the end. It is no wonder that we face the 21st century with a failed model of Christianity!
The religion which stood up to the Pax Romana and over came it, survived the onslaught of the Roman Catholic Church of the Middle Ages and survived it - albeit only in the inaccessible isles of Ireland and Scotland, survived the attempts to revive Christianity during the Reformation - was to die almost completely due to the cult of Self in the 20th and 21st centuries.
True believers stand in a unique spot before God, we face critics whom are justified in their statements, we face self serving members of churches whom know all of the right words - just not in their hearts, and there is this lost and seeking world out there whom has looked at Christianity and due to the examples they see - can not believe that this is actually the way to Salvation!
In fact, the ones I meet and talk to, are appalled by what they have seen, heard and why was it they should be believing in this disaster called Christianity again ...?
March 16, 2015
A Shaken Daughter
Oldest Daughter is shaken up.
It seems on Friday, her not so good friend, my Virtual Daughter Number 6's, mother died.
Now VDN6 and I have a long and troubled relationship. I have known her for almost two decades, she was a friend of VDN5 and OD, so they all hung out at my home. They all called me Pops, understanding that there was an implied relationship in that - giving me the right to get into their face when they needed it.
VDN6 and OD ran away together and VDN6's mother gave them sanctuary. So her and I did not see eye to eye, she believed that a 17 year old girl and a 23 year old guy was a beautiful thing. I felt otherwise. To prove the point VDN6 found herself a 23 year old and the next thing you know we have two pregnant teenagers on our hands. Where is the surprise in that I wonder!
But, VDN6 has remained a distant daughter through the years - because I do not throw family away.
And quite by surprise, the mother died Friday - heart attack it seems, during the night. That is one thing women do, do well - die from strokes and heart attacks that a guy would statistically survive. (I wonder why?) And VDN6 is now facing a future she never considered.
And OD is quite shaken up! So now she is all over me about my health issues and wanting to find ways of solving them. Very cute. But, in reality, she already lost her father and mother once through death and I am guessing this is causing very many issues and emotions to resurface in her life.
Prayers for OD and VDN6 greatly appreciated.
I expect to attend the memorial on Tuesday. VDN6's mother was her last living relative. So, I guess if she needs an ear, mine will get chewed on again. And maybe she can be brought to understand that Jesus is not the enemy.
It seems on Friday, her not so good friend, my Virtual Daughter Number 6's, mother died.
Now VDN6 and I have a long and troubled relationship. I have known her for almost two decades, she was a friend of VDN5 and OD, so they all hung out at my home. They all called me Pops, understanding that there was an implied relationship in that - giving me the right to get into their face when they needed it.
VDN6 and OD ran away together and VDN6's mother gave them sanctuary. So her and I did not see eye to eye, she believed that a 17 year old girl and a 23 year old guy was a beautiful thing. I felt otherwise. To prove the point VDN6 found herself a 23 year old and the next thing you know we have two pregnant teenagers on our hands. Where is the surprise in that I wonder!
But, VDN6 has remained a distant daughter through the years - because I do not throw family away.
And quite by surprise, the mother died Friday - heart attack it seems, during the night. That is one thing women do, do well - die from strokes and heart attacks that a guy would statistically survive. (I wonder why?) And VDN6 is now facing a future she never considered.
And OD is quite shaken up! So now she is all over me about my health issues and wanting to find ways of solving them. Very cute. But, in reality, she already lost her father and mother once through death and I am guessing this is causing very many issues and emotions to resurface in her life.
Prayers for OD and VDN6 greatly appreciated.
I expect to attend the memorial on Tuesday. VDN6's mother was her last living relative. So, I guess if she needs an ear, mine will get chewed on again. And maybe she can be brought to understand that Jesus is not the enemy.
March 14, 2015
Musical Saturday Morning
I awoke last week with this song hauntingly cycling through my mind. It took quite a while to find it because I could not remember the title or group and only had a fragment of it in my awake state.
I know most of my friends would be taken back because this is not me, not my style, nothing about it is reflective of me .... And that is a problem in my life - only two of my friends even know me any longer well enough to know that this song is me. It does embody what is left of me anyways. The old me, Alice Cooper and all, even the 1980's lover, is now long gone.
So start up the beat machine, turn on that synthesizer and then let the sultry voice of Tracy Thorn lull you into what i think is a nice song. Shhhh, she is stepping up the mike ...
I know most of my friends would be taken back because this is not me, not my style, nothing about it is reflective of me .... And that is a problem in my life - only two of my friends even know me any longer well enough to know that this song is me. It does embody what is left of me anyways. The old me, Alice Cooper and all, even the 1980's lover, is now long gone.
So start up the beat machine, turn on that synthesizer and then let the sultry voice of Tracy Thorn lull you into what i think is a nice song. Shhhh, she is stepping up the mike ...
March 13, 2015
But, What If ...
But, what if God really does work this way? You know - name it and claim it, you have not because you ask not, etc ...
So you believe that God created you, in order to shower you with materialistic wealth, physical blessings beyond your imagination in this lifetime ...
And yet, we are told that God created us to glorify Him. How does my driving a Jaguar glorify God? How does my possession of anything glorify God?
You and I are to be a stranger in a strange land, we are to be His representative - an ambassador - to a lost and dying world. It means we are NOT apart of the land we live in, we are a part of the land we are to go to when we leave this one! That is the concept of ambassador, representative - not a member of, not a mirror image of the culture you are staying in!
God does not you to accumulate wealth, he needs you reaching out and touching lives for Him! That would be all of those lives on the other side of your car door, the other side of you house door, the other side of the walls you throw up to keep people away. They are so annoying after-all!
Instead we spend billions believing we are extending our lives, when in fact God tells us we can not draw one more breath than he has given us. You WILL die at the appointed time and there is nothing you can do about it. Sorry, ripped abs or not, if that bread truck backs over you, it is over.
We spend billions to send other people to witness, others to reap the harvest WE were told to be a part of. Our cultic religion tells us that our money lets us be a part of the harvest, to gain brownie points in heaven with God. Really? God never told anyone to donate well, blessed are those whom donate and then ignore their responsibilities ... You get the point. You are called to action - not planning, not procrastinating, not sending someone else in your church (or even someone you do not even know!).
If we do not wake up this sleeping church there will literally be masses swept away, believing they were the chosen, they were the faithful, but they did nothing and thought - had been taught! - this was just fine with God.
Wake up Christian! Get into a Bible study! Oh you don't like the teaching? You don't like the leaders? You don't like the other people at the study? Then you must be mighty special because God says your righteous is nothing but "filthy rags"! Get on your knees, Get over yourself, Get into submission to God and his representatives, and then learn and grow the way God ordained that you should! (realizing of course that the church of today is lost and corrupt - however, God still has his faithful everywhere, you just have to pray and search them out! by the way, they are ones whom do not agree with you if the beginning of this paragraph is you .... )
So you believe that God created you, in order to shower you with materialistic wealth, physical blessings beyond your imagination in this lifetime ...
And yet, we are told that God created us to glorify Him. How does my driving a Jaguar glorify God? How does my possession of anything glorify God?
You and I are to be a stranger in a strange land, we are to be His representative - an ambassador - to a lost and dying world. It means we are NOT apart of the land we live in, we are a part of the land we are to go to when we leave this one! That is the concept of ambassador, representative - not a member of, not a mirror image of the culture you are staying in!
God does not you to accumulate wealth, he needs you reaching out and touching lives for Him! That would be all of those lives on the other side of your car door, the other side of you house door, the other side of the walls you throw up to keep people away. They are so annoying after-all!
Instead we spend billions believing we are extending our lives, when in fact God tells us we can not draw one more breath than he has given us. You WILL die at the appointed time and there is nothing you can do about it. Sorry, ripped abs or not, if that bread truck backs over you, it is over.
We spend billions to send other people to witness, others to reap the harvest WE were told to be a part of. Our cultic religion tells us that our money lets us be a part of the harvest, to gain brownie points in heaven with God. Really? God never told anyone to donate well, blessed are those whom donate and then ignore their responsibilities ... You get the point. You are called to action - not planning, not procrastinating, not sending someone else in your church (or even someone you do not even know!).
If we do not wake up this sleeping church there will literally be masses swept away, believing they were the chosen, they were the faithful, but they did nothing and thought - had been taught! - this was just fine with God.
Wake up Christian! Get into a Bible study! Oh you don't like the teaching? You don't like the leaders? You don't like the other people at the study? Then you must be mighty special because God says your righteous is nothing but "filthy rags"! Get on your knees, Get over yourself, Get into submission to God and his representatives, and then learn and grow the way God ordained that you should! (realizing of course that the church of today is lost and corrupt - however, God still has his faithful everywhere, you just have to pray and search them out! by the way, they are ones whom do not agree with you if the beginning of this paragraph is you .... )
March 12, 2015
Superstition's Fine Line
In my last post, I referred to today's christian church as being superstitious and yeah, that brought a bit of comment. :)
Within the current culture of modern christianity is woven a complex web of old wive's tales, cultic beliefs, practices and worldwide gullibility.
Because I was hit by a truck while bicycling in 1996, "Why Kris if only you wore a suit to church, God would be protecting you! But, as it is you whom disrespect God and He ... well ..." I honestly burst out laughing in that lady's face. I am still chuckling all of these years later.
I am a complete and utter klutz, my ability to injure myself is legendary ... Apparently not. "You must be the worst sinner on the face of the Earth Kris! God is constantly having to injure you just to get your attention!" "No, Paul is claimed to be the worse sinner, so either Paul is a liar or I am less sinful than him!" "Whaaaaaaaaaaaa ... ?"
"You know Kris, you only have transportation troubles (constantly!) because you are doing something wrong! You know if you just tithed you would have no troubles at all!" "Uhm, I am not willing to reduce my giving to the God's ministries so that He can bless me more ..." Yeah, historically, my detractors give about half what I do ... They must be really blessed!
"Kris, you just do not pray enough. Why if you only prayed more, your parents would be Christian and you children less troubled!" I wonder how many decades, three times a day, praying for my parents, does not become "enough" to push them over the edge! Really?
"Sorry to hear about that fire Kris! (anyone remember that 2005 fire from the long defunct blog?) You know, if you just would "claim" God's safety and protection things like this would never happen!" I can't even honor that one with a response!
Yeah, everything in our life is our own fault because we do not possess the "faith" to name it and claim it - so therefore, we apparently suffer because God demands our requests before He dishes out blessings ...
Seemingly, God blesses me unexpectedly, without my having to ask, much less imagine the multiples of ways in which He does! Literally, I have watched my life go to Hell in a handbasket across the past six years - and equally I have seen His blessings day after day throughout the same period of time. Most of them I will never mention - because then we can start a new superstition - be like Kris and you will blessed! Not! But, you medial expenditures would go up ...
So, we seem to have a quandary :\
God blesses without our expectation or having to ask
Those whom demand/ask/expect often receive as well
Can both approaches be true?
Well God is sovereign, so He can and will do as He pleases. But, I have to think on the Old Testament Book of Job 40:6-14 as well as Job 42:1-6.
I think those two verses sum up Job's discovery about God rather well. No, Christian superstition is not addressed in the Bible, except perhaps by extension in the Epistles of John where John had to argue against the gnostic's and their belief in "hidden knowledge", only available to the select ... Join our church and learn about how you can be blessed ....
No, God's knowledge, which He shares with us is for all. It is the cult wherer things are hidden, only the very select, the very faithful, the most generous, can be taught and know ... and well most people are not part of the select ... so therefore the Bible is hidden knowledge, unknowable by you or anyone other than them ...
It is why we know the Health and Wealth gospel to not be the gospel of Jesus, but one of demons.
Sorry world .... you truly are going to Hell because you have willingly allowed yourself to be misled.
Within the current culture of modern christianity is woven a complex web of old wive's tales, cultic beliefs, practices and worldwide gullibility.
Because I was hit by a truck while bicycling in 1996, "Why Kris if only you wore a suit to church, God would be protecting you! But, as it is you whom disrespect God and He ... well ..." I honestly burst out laughing in that lady's face. I am still chuckling all of these years later.
I am a complete and utter klutz, my ability to injure myself is legendary ... Apparently not. "You must be the worst sinner on the face of the Earth Kris! God is constantly having to injure you just to get your attention!" "No, Paul is claimed to be the worse sinner, so either Paul is a liar or I am less sinful than him!" "Whaaaaaaaaaaaa ... ?"
"You know Kris, you only have transportation troubles (constantly!) because you are doing something wrong! You know if you just tithed you would have no troubles at all!" "Uhm, I am not willing to reduce my giving to the God's ministries so that He can bless me more ..." Yeah, historically, my detractors give about half what I do ... They must be really blessed!
"Kris, you just do not pray enough. Why if you only prayed more, your parents would be Christian and you children less troubled!" I wonder how many decades, three times a day, praying for my parents, does not become "enough" to push them over the edge! Really?
"Sorry to hear about that fire Kris! (anyone remember that 2005 fire from the long defunct blog?) You know, if you just would "claim" God's safety and protection things like this would never happen!" I can't even honor that one with a response!
Yeah, everything in our life is our own fault because we do not possess the "faith" to name it and claim it - so therefore, we apparently suffer because God demands our requests before He dishes out blessings ...
Seemingly, God blesses me unexpectedly, without my having to ask, much less imagine the multiples of ways in which He does! Literally, I have watched my life go to Hell in a handbasket across the past six years - and equally I have seen His blessings day after day throughout the same period of time. Most of them I will never mention - because then we can start a new superstition - be like Kris and you will blessed! Not! But, you medial expenditures would go up ...
So, we seem to have a quandary :\
God blesses without our expectation or having to ask
Those whom demand/ask/expect often receive as well
Can both approaches be true?
Well God is sovereign, so He can and will do as He pleases. But, I have to think on the Old Testament Book of Job 40:6-14 as well as Job 42:1-6.
I think those two verses sum up Job's discovery about God rather well. No, Christian superstition is not addressed in the Bible, except perhaps by extension in the Epistles of John where John had to argue against the gnostic's and their belief in "hidden knowledge", only available to the select ... Join our church and learn about how you can be blessed ....
No, God's knowledge, which He shares with us is for all. It is the cult wherer things are hidden, only the very select, the very faithful, the most generous, can be taught and know ... and well most people are not part of the select ... so therefore the Bible is hidden knowledge, unknowable by you or anyone other than them ...
It is why we know the Health and Wealth gospel to not be the gospel of Jesus, but one of demons.
Sorry world .... you truly are going to Hell because you have willingly allowed yourself to be misled.
March 11, 2015
Perspective
Perspective is everything, as we are told. Depending upon where you are standing, that perspective can change dramatically! "So what?", you say? Well just follow along ...
I have through the years known some mighty godly (reason for the small "g") and pious elders through the years, here and abroad. This abomination now called christianity has spread worldwide, pious people can be found everywhere. They appear mighty Godly, but when the rubber hits the road, well then we get to see their real faith was not in Jesus at all but in their own willpower.
Thinking of one of them, staunch christian, standard family, he made it widely known his faith was everything to him ... until his teenage daughter's extracurricular activities caught up with her. The suddenly prolife family is now sending her rapidly and quietly off for an abortion, selling their house at a loss and moving to points unknown. Well, I knew, they moved to the other side of town, put their daughter into a different high school, change churches and it was now life as usual. The past is after all the past ... right?
Really?
Sorry, God does not work that way. If you advertise that you are called by HIS name and you pull a huge fubar like murder of the unborn, God will hold you accountable. He will do whatever it takes, pull out the stops, to bring you back ... and we are not talking about kindness here. He is God, He is Sovereign and you little backside is toast when you cross Him. Bob moving his family, changing the daughter's school, changing churches is not going to hide anything - because our God, the REAL God, does not like secrets, does not like lies and really does not like murder! Sure you can repent of any or all of it, and you will still pay a price - because you attempted to trash HIS name, HIS witness, making a mockery of HIS salvation only He can offer. And yes, all of these changes are what precedes a full scale teenage melt down.
Conversely, Bob may well have been a real Christian, whom set his sights on the world and its standards. His reaction was therefore the same as the world's. He allowed himself to play in Satan's domain, his daughter was therefore misled, attacked, failed and got to pay a price for his either being weak or ineffectual in her life (yeah, four fingers pointing back here!). But, you know, Satan likes it when you destroy your Christian witness! One highly visible failure by us as a Christian and multiples now will never listen to anything concerning God - he is a fake right? Just like Bob or anyone of us.
And Satan will reward you handsomely for furthering its goals of leading the world away from God, away from Jesus, away from truth, away from salvation. So all is well with Bob, life is even better than before. Well, in the short run anyway ...
But, God does not work that way and will make Bob quite miserable in His attempts to call Bob back onto his knees before Him ...
To make a horrible story short - by the end of the year: Bob had lost his $200k job, when that was quite a piece of change!, his wife had left him, his daughter was gang raped in French class, when the teacher had to run to the office .....
Well, you can recover from a job loss, you can recover from losing your loved ones, you can destroy another unborn life in the attempt to keep things secret, but it is a bit harder to recover from having your daughter's mind snap from the violence she was exposed to. At their trial, the six young men involved testified that they heard from their friends, at her old school, she was "easy" - so what the heck, she wouldn't mind after all. (They were sentenced as adults and with no time off for good behavior, they still have 5 more years to go ... )
It is now 20 years later. Bob never did recover. He did come to understand that his failures as a man opened the doors through which his family was attacked. Yes, his daughter and his wife had to make their own choices and pay their own price for playing Satan's games, but the thought remains for him and for us whom watched and tried to intervene unsuccessfully: was any of this avoidable? His wife contracted HPV and died rapidly. His daughter moved in with other family and eventually fell into drugs, alcohol, prostitution and suicide.
You say, where is the perspective here?!?!?!?!
Oh it is there:
Proverbs 16:25 - There is a way which seems right to a man, But its end is the way of death.
Perhaps just like Bob, you are living the perfect life. Health and Wealth were his because he claimed them! Too bad for fools like me whom do not understand that this is exactly what God wants for each of us! He got his, he enjoyed his, he lusted after more. And Satan had him.
So many of my friends are trapped in this religion of superstition and occultism! And randomly, God calls them to account, but they do not understand this - no, their faith must be slipping, other people in their family are the weak ones, God does not work this way ...
It is all a question of perspective after all.
I have through the years known some mighty godly (reason for the small "g") and pious elders through the years, here and abroad. This abomination now called christianity has spread worldwide, pious people can be found everywhere. They appear mighty Godly, but when the rubber hits the road, well then we get to see their real faith was not in Jesus at all but in their own willpower.
Thinking of one of them, staunch christian, standard family, he made it widely known his faith was everything to him ... until his teenage daughter's extracurricular activities caught up with her. The suddenly prolife family is now sending her rapidly and quietly off for an abortion, selling their house at a loss and moving to points unknown. Well, I knew, they moved to the other side of town, put their daughter into a different high school, change churches and it was now life as usual. The past is after all the past ... right?
Really?
Sorry, God does not work that way. If you advertise that you are called by HIS name and you pull a huge fubar like murder of the unborn, God will hold you accountable. He will do whatever it takes, pull out the stops, to bring you back ... and we are not talking about kindness here. He is God, He is Sovereign and you little backside is toast when you cross Him. Bob moving his family, changing the daughter's school, changing churches is not going to hide anything - because our God, the REAL God, does not like secrets, does not like lies and really does not like murder! Sure you can repent of any or all of it, and you will still pay a price - because you attempted to trash HIS name, HIS witness, making a mockery of HIS salvation only He can offer. And yes, all of these changes are what precedes a full scale teenage melt down.
Conversely, Bob may well have been a real Christian, whom set his sights on the world and its standards. His reaction was therefore the same as the world's. He allowed himself to play in Satan's domain, his daughter was therefore misled, attacked, failed and got to pay a price for his either being weak or ineffectual in her life (yeah, four fingers pointing back here!). But, you know, Satan likes it when you destroy your Christian witness! One highly visible failure by us as a Christian and multiples now will never listen to anything concerning God - he is a fake right? Just like Bob or anyone of us.
And Satan will reward you handsomely for furthering its goals of leading the world away from God, away from Jesus, away from truth, away from salvation. So all is well with Bob, life is even better than before. Well, in the short run anyway ...
But, God does not work that way and will make Bob quite miserable in His attempts to call Bob back onto his knees before Him ...
To make a horrible story short - by the end of the year: Bob had lost his $200k job, when that was quite a piece of change!, his wife had left him, his daughter was gang raped in French class, when the teacher had to run to the office .....
Well, you can recover from a job loss, you can recover from losing your loved ones, you can destroy another unborn life in the attempt to keep things secret, but it is a bit harder to recover from having your daughter's mind snap from the violence she was exposed to. At their trial, the six young men involved testified that they heard from their friends, at her old school, she was "easy" - so what the heck, she wouldn't mind after all. (They were sentenced as adults and with no time off for good behavior, they still have 5 more years to go ... )
It is now 20 years later. Bob never did recover. He did come to understand that his failures as a man opened the doors through which his family was attacked. Yes, his daughter and his wife had to make their own choices and pay their own price for playing Satan's games, but the thought remains for him and for us whom watched and tried to intervene unsuccessfully: was any of this avoidable? His wife contracted HPV and died rapidly. His daughter moved in with other family and eventually fell into drugs, alcohol, prostitution and suicide.
You say, where is the perspective here?!?!?!?!
Oh it is there:
Proverbs 16:25 - There is a way which seems right to a man, But its end is the way of death.
Perhaps just like Bob, you are living the perfect life. Health and Wealth were his because he claimed them! Too bad for fools like me whom do not understand that this is exactly what God wants for each of us! He got his, he enjoyed his, he lusted after more. And Satan had him.
So many of my friends are trapped in this religion of superstition and occultism! And randomly, God calls them to account, but they do not understand this - no, their faith must be slipping, other people in their family are the weak ones, God does not work this way ...
It is all a question of perspective after all.
March 10, 2015
Childrens TV
Father was addicted to TV, oh was he ever! He was a Rat Patrol addict. I sort of could understand this, from the aspect that Uncle Fritz served in intelligence under Rommel in North Africa. But, this was the same father whom razzed me continually for watching Hop-a-Long Cassidy and Rin Tin Tin. Father walked in the door and off went all westerns!
Yeah, I have always been an old west-phile. Even as a child I know I was born in the wrong century. It was not the excitement of the old west - shooting indians and the such, it was the fact there were standards and people followed standards. Those whom did not? Well, you made your choice and the will of the people would be your undoing ....
And I instinctively knew that the taking of human life was wrong, no one in my family would ever have agreed with that one! One of the reasons I did not care for Rat Patrol or Combat or any of the myriad of such shows father watched ... there were many he wanted dead - most of them Russian. And he relished watching movies with death - they more the better in his book!
The only thing we did agree on, on the TV, was Saturday morning cartoons and then only Wiley Coyote and the Roadrunner. Father saw himself as smarter than the universe, so he was obviously the roadrunner. Not so fortunate, I was an utter klutz even as a child ... yeah, the curse of the Coyote.
So, I was sitting here Sunday, with fmy our year old grand-daughter on my lap and she is completely mesmerized by My Little Pony. And I am sitting here thinking, what on earth is iat that she sees in this to hold her attention so riveted? For 3.5 hours!
As an experiment I tried to distract her by an old western - real horse, real story. Nope she was not going to have any of that it! It would be Rainbow Dash all the way!
I wonder if it is a brain thing. I mean could cartoon images be more attractive to the child mind over life-like images? But, as a child of her age, I preferred real images to pretend ... except for Underdog! He could fly and well, real dogs do not do so well off the ground ... Then again, if I was addicted to the cartoon world as a child it would have been the Rocky and Bullwinkle Show! I would sell my sister to watch Rock and Bullwinkle! No real loss there either! LOL (I can say that because she does not read my blog, nor much else on the computer!)
So, Hop-a-Long or Bullwinkle? Sargent Preston or Dudley Do-right? Superman or Underdog?
I do not mind losing Superman, but all of the others were my favorites. A mixture of real images and cartoon, both fascinated me. But, for grand-daughter it is only cartoons at this stage.
It will be interesting to see how her life goes to see if that is a predictor of something about her mind we still do not know yet.
Oh yeah, and at four, when my grandmother would let me stay up, The Twilight Zone .... but do not let my mother know!
Yeah, I have always been an old west-phile. Even as a child I know I was born in the wrong century. It was not the excitement of the old west - shooting indians and the such, it was the fact there were standards and people followed standards. Those whom did not? Well, you made your choice and the will of the people would be your undoing ....
And I instinctively knew that the taking of human life was wrong, no one in my family would ever have agreed with that one! One of the reasons I did not care for Rat Patrol or Combat or any of the myriad of such shows father watched ... there were many he wanted dead - most of them Russian. And he relished watching movies with death - they more the better in his book!
The only thing we did agree on, on the TV, was Saturday morning cartoons and then only Wiley Coyote and the Roadrunner. Father saw himself as smarter than the universe, so he was obviously the roadrunner. Not so fortunate, I was an utter klutz even as a child ... yeah, the curse of the Coyote.
So, I was sitting here Sunday, with fmy our year old grand-daughter on my lap and she is completely mesmerized by My Little Pony. And I am sitting here thinking, what on earth is iat that she sees in this to hold her attention so riveted? For 3.5 hours!
As an experiment I tried to distract her by an old western - real horse, real story. Nope she was not going to have any of that it! It would be Rainbow Dash all the way!
I wonder if it is a brain thing. I mean could cartoon images be more attractive to the child mind over life-like images? But, as a child of her age, I preferred real images to pretend ... except for Underdog! He could fly and well, real dogs do not do so well off the ground ... Then again, if I was addicted to the cartoon world as a child it would have been the Rocky and Bullwinkle Show! I would sell my sister to watch Rock and Bullwinkle! No real loss there either! LOL (I can say that because she does not read my blog, nor much else on the computer!)
So, Hop-a-Long or Bullwinkle? Sargent Preston or Dudley Do-right? Superman or Underdog?
I do not mind losing Superman, but all of the others were my favorites. A mixture of real images and cartoon, both fascinated me. But, for grand-daughter it is only cartoons at this stage.
It will be interesting to see how her life goes to see if that is a predictor of something about her mind we still do not know yet.
Oh yeah, and at four, when my grandmother would let me stay up, The Twilight Zone .... but do not let my mother know!
March 9, 2015
Unknown Allergy
I like understanding everything around me and obviously that is not going to happen. So then, I switch into observation mode and ponder until I do. Some things I may well never understand but I do the motives of man and so those are less of a mystery as I can write them off as to the corruption of man.
I dined at IKEA the other night, first time in years I think, and I had the usual: smoked salmon, as well as, smoked salmon with root vegetable salad. Add some additional hard tack crackers, two bowl of awesome split pea soup, all washed down with lingonberry juice and we have a great meal. Sigh ... :)
Then slowly toured the store. Stopped to buy some cinnamon rolls but the guy ahead of me bought the last ones (grrrrrrrrrrrr!). So, off to the movies across the street to see the latest from the Night In The Museum series.
I did not expect much from the movie, I do like Ben Stiller, especially after The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, so hoped it would be good. It was great!
Set all of the clocks back, then off to an early bedtime. Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick .....
12:30 am and I am VIOLENT ill, again.
And I thought on this randomly happening to me this year, about once every two weeks, sometimes twice a week.
I ate nothing I was allergic to. Have sniffed no laser toner fumes lately. Nothing new, again. And for 1.5 hours as I sat in the bathroom, another half hour sitting in my office chair sipping Powerade ... I thought and analyzed everything.
I had a cough drop after breakfast, something had set off my throat.
I analyzed probable ingredients to everything I ate. Could there have been chilies in the soup?
I had popcorn during the movie. Corn a problem again? Its hasn't been for 20 years.
Was it nerves? Gaelic Girl and I had crossed swords earlier.
But other times this year:
One was a write off due to my allergy to SPLENDA - yes, it is broken down by the body.
One was due to a surprise jalapeno, unexpected and then mourned. :(
And that leaves a whole lot of unknowns.
Obviously, the answer is to go an allergist ... seems the one I had in the 1980s has now retired, was not replaced by anyone and that is the end of allergist within quite a driving distance! Well, I did find one, as long as I have a car that day, but they can not see me for testing until June ... and well, yeah, I expect to be in traction by then. Sigh.
I hate allergies. They seem to come and go, for no reason and can not be predicted at all. As my allergist had said in 1980, "Kris, you are so lucky! You can have all of the beer and shrimp you could ever want!"
Well, I had to watch the shrimp because of the fat content and as for beer, well all alcohol is out of my if I want to take my heart medicine at night. And so yeah, I will eat a few shrimp this year - never more than just a few in any given month. As for beer, I am more of stout man, but that is at most two or three times a year.
But, I think if I want to die it will be by jalapeno poppers and rum ...
Just kidding! :)
I dined at IKEA the other night, first time in years I think, and I had the usual: smoked salmon, as well as, smoked salmon with root vegetable salad. Add some additional hard tack crackers, two bowl of awesome split pea soup, all washed down with lingonberry juice and we have a great meal. Sigh ... :)
Then slowly toured the store. Stopped to buy some cinnamon rolls but the guy ahead of me bought the last ones (grrrrrrrrrrrr!). So, off to the movies across the street to see the latest from the Night In The Museum series.
I did not expect much from the movie, I do like Ben Stiller, especially after The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, so hoped it would be good. It was great!
Set all of the clocks back, then off to an early bedtime. Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick .....
12:30 am and I am VIOLENT ill, again.
And I thought on this randomly happening to me this year, about once every two weeks, sometimes twice a week.
I ate nothing I was allergic to. Have sniffed no laser toner fumes lately. Nothing new, again. And for 1.5 hours as I sat in the bathroom, another half hour sitting in my office chair sipping Powerade ... I thought and analyzed everything.
I had a cough drop after breakfast, something had set off my throat.
I analyzed probable ingredients to everything I ate. Could there have been chilies in the soup?
I had popcorn during the movie. Corn a problem again? Its hasn't been for 20 years.
Was it nerves? Gaelic Girl and I had crossed swords earlier.
But other times this year:
One was a write off due to my allergy to SPLENDA - yes, it is broken down by the body.
One was due to a surprise jalapeno, unexpected and then mourned. :(
And that leaves a whole lot of unknowns.
Obviously, the answer is to go an allergist ... seems the one I had in the 1980s has now retired, was not replaced by anyone and that is the end of allergist within quite a driving distance! Well, I did find one, as long as I have a car that day, but they can not see me for testing until June ... and well, yeah, I expect to be in traction by then. Sigh.
I hate allergies. They seem to come and go, for no reason and can not be predicted at all. As my allergist had said in 1980, "Kris, you are so lucky! You can have all of the beer and shrimp you could ever want!"
Well, I had to watch the shrimp because of the fat content and as for beer, well all alcohol is out of my if I want to take my heart medicine at night. And so yeah, I will eat a few shrimp this year - never more than just a few in any given month. As for beer, I am more of stout man, but that is at most two or three times a year.
But, I think if I want to die it will be by jalapeno poppers and rum ...
Just kidding! :)
March 7, 2015
Musical Saturday Morning
I do not believe we NATA Brats ever heard a single song by the Who while I was in Europe, simply given no air time on the US Post radio stations. This song was from 1967, this video shot at New Year's Eve, it was easily well into the 1970's before I ever heard the song. I heard other kids, recently from either the US or England, talking about the Who but was utterly clueless as to whom they were.
Years later, when I was in college, licking my wounds from my first girlfriend and I went, "Oh yeah ...", when I first heard this song. I understood this song all to well in retrospect. (I was with Mark Lindsay, of the Raiders fame, as he was spinning platters for his weekly radio show, so he had lots to share about the Who as the song played!)
Interestingly, this song was considered a bit of a curse. The song was literally built in pieces, in various studios around the world. Thus the drumming was almost impossible to duplicate, the vocals were hard to replicate on-stage, when performed by the Who it was always mimed!, and the album was dead on arrival in Europe. It was considered too "heavy" ... whatever that means! LOL!
Years later, when I was in college, licking my wounds from my first girlfriend and I went, "Oh yeah ...", when I first heard this song. I understood this song all to well in retrospect. (I was with Mark Lindsay, of the Raiders fame, as he was spinning platters for his weekly radio show, so he had lots to share about the Who as the song played!)
Interestingly, this song was considered a bit of a curse. The song was literally built in pieces, in various studios around the world. Thus the drumming was almost impossible to duplicate, the vocals were hard to replicate on-stage, when performed by the Who it was always mimed!, and the album was dead on arrival in Europe. It was considered too "heavy" ... whatever that means! LOL!
March 6, 2015
TV
I do not watch TV, there is simply nothing on which even intrigues me in the slightest. I will sit and work on my computer (which I have done far too much of this year, just to keep it up!) while Youngest Daughter watches any of the bevy of programs which do capture her attention. Not in any order: The Voice, The Bachelor, Cake Boss (?), Big Bang Theory, and on and on the list goes.
She got me somewhat hooked on Alaska State Troopers, the show is so appalling in it s look as to what the population, or maybe just the seedy underbelly of Alaska looks like. I have been to Alaska and marveled that there simply appears to be no one living in Alaska whom is not of the criminal ilk. Sorry Sarah, I have to wonder about you as well.
And occassionally, Big Bang will have accidentally hired a writer whom is capable of more than Hollywood sexual innuindo culture and will be witty - but by and large that show is utter - well, its not Scottish as my great-grandfather was prone to say ... sorry Mike Meyers, you did not invent that phrase either!
But, I did watch The Batchelor this week. I have no idea what YD sees in this show but she is rivetted to the TV with her box of kleenex and booing want-a-be farmer boy. Sorry I grew up on a Danish farm, so if this is farmland USA's best product ... no wonder we get most of our agriculture from New Zealand and Chile! Gees! Personally young women of this country - you really need to discover what values are, so that you can spot a poser when you see one! GEES!
Then I also watched The Voice. YD is hooked on Russell Wilson of the Seahawks, Sam Hunt (?) and Blake Sheldon - and in that order. Yes, she is sold out on country western - uhm - music but not as much as she is in highly muscled quaterbacks - LOL. Some people on that show actually had talent and you have to assume that they are either professional and trying to get ahead or might actually have talent. But, the line up of "judges"? Pompous posers, the lot of them. Closest to what might be a normal person is Blake, but I know nothing about him and really do not care to either. But, the other three - whom I also know nothing of - avoid at all cost! BLEECH!
Thankfully I was gone almost all of yesterday so did not have to be subjected to anymore of her horror shows she watches ... except for Alaska State Troopers ... almost addictive, if you let it.
She got me somewhat hooked on Alaska State Troopers, the show is so appalling in it s look as to what the population, or maybe just the seedy underbelly of Alaska looks like. I have been to Alaska and marveled that there simply appears to be no one living in Alaska whom is not of the criminal ilk. Sorry Sarah, I have to wonder about you as well.
And occassionally, Big Bang will have accidentally hired a writer whom is capable of more than Hollywood sexual innuindo culture and will be witty - but by and large that show is utter - well, its not Scottish as my great-grandfather was prone to say ... sorry Mike Meyers, you did not invent that phrase either!
But, I did watch The Batchelor this week. I have no idea what YD sees in this show but she is rivetted to the TV with her box of kleenex and booing want-a-be farmer boy. Sorry I grew up on a Danish farm, so if this is farmland USA's best product ... no wonder we get most of our agriculture from New Zealand and Chile! Gees! Personally young women of this country - you really need to discover what values are, so that you can spot a poser when you see one! GEES!
Then I also watched The Voice. YD is hooked on Russell Wilson of the Seahawks, Sam Hunt (?) and Blake Sheldon - and in that order. Yes, she is sold out on country western - uhm - music but not as much as she is in highly muscled quaterbacks - LOL. Some people on that show actually had talent and you have to assume that they are either professional and trying to get ahead or might actually have talent. But, the line up of "judges"? Pompous posers, the lot of them. Closest to what might be a normal person is Blake, but I know nothing about him and really do not care to either. But, the other three - whom I also know nothing of - avoid at all cost! BLEECH!
Thankfully I was gone almost all of yesterday so did not have to be subjected to anymore of her horror shows she watches ... except for Alaska State Troopers ... almost addictive, if you let it.
March 5, 2015
Blessings
We live in a warped Christian culture, tainted by poor Biblical knowledge, poisoned by Satan's usage of men whom appear to be the best of the best of the best in Christianity! Only problem? They are so far being Christian that there is no hope for them - short of God doing a smack down on them. And there is another problem, lots of Christian flock to them because these men of lies tell them what they want to hear.
2 Timothy 4:3
For the time will come when people will not put up with sound doctrine.
Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great
number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear.
Do I need to give you examples? Pick anyone in the Health and Wealth gospel road show, Blab It and Grab It, Positive Confession, Motivational speakers and on and on and on. There is almost no end to the contortion Satan is willing to raise up men of free tongue and questionable ethics to literally fleece the flock ....
Yes, one of my favorite topics from defunct but still around Thoughts From The Little Apple. And those posts generated the attacks which brought down Blogger and the Little Apple numerous times! Yeah, I backed off naming names just to not bring on any more attacks.
But, locally here are people such as Casey Treat, long ago labelled a heretic in the media and books. Does not seem to matter where you go, they are already there, dishing out their swill and calling it Christianity and their superiority to those "unknowledgable losers". You know Christians like you and me, willing to wait on God and serve Him, not ourselves.
Turn on the TV and there they are Treat, Copeland, Hickey, Hinn, on and on the list goes, national and local figures are serving up the poison of Satan - placing ourselves before others, going for the outrageous, anything to stay new and relevant as Christians are pushed further and further from Jesus.
You remember, Jesus, the one whom was the willing servant to all men and even died for them. Broken body, deserted by all, dead.
Think about Paul, Peter, John, Andrew, any of the apostles. Yeah they were real overcomers as they lived in poverty, served their fellow man to their dying day! All they overcame was death, through Jesus ......
And all of the Christians of the first and second centuries. Yeah, lots of healthy, wealthy, knowingly smug Christians fed to the animals ... NOT! They were the poor, the broken, but Christians will to sacrifice their life as their Jesus had.
No Blessings are none of these things ...
That car that might have hit you and missed - God's hand and blessing?
That money you found just at the right time - God's hand and blessing?
That call or visit when you were down and needing - God's hand and blessing?
That high pressure job loss, just before you heart acts up - God's hand and blessing?
etc ...
Getting the idea here? God can use material goods, wealth and health - but they are not necessary for or of any value to Him. In our suffering for Him is found our witness to a lost world.
You can love your Joel Osteen's and his ilk, just do not rely upon his teachings to lead you to Jesus or to strengthen you in Jesus - those are unpopular concepts with this crowd.
And well, Jesus is the goal, He is the one whom counts in the end and the more you know of Him and are able to emulate Him, the closer you will grown in Him. And that is only possible in and through study of the Bible.
Got the Book, open it! If not get a Bible, open it and study ... like your eternal life depends upon it!
March 4, 2015
Bad To Worse
It is a sick way of looking at things, it is almost humorous at how bad Friday was and how it all went even further downhill from there ...
So, Friday, completely and utterly conquered by misery and anger. Yeah, I was able to repent and know I was forgiven for failing Him whom I am sworn to serve. And it is not like all aspects of my life are negative, it is just that the negative is so great that it flattens a great many gold stars continually. I do have one positive in my life. Sigh ...
And as expected, my heart began failing, it took quite a few nitro pills to get me through the weekend. The angina, preceding an attack really is not very pleasant. Anger or Angina? I am not sure which is worse - at least anger can be overcome with prayer, not so much angina that I have found.
Sunday, still suffering from the continual angina and guessing I was going to have to go to emergency soon, I just held on and waited to see if it would abate. I kept it a quiet day, well as quiet as you can have babysitting a four year old grand-daughter whom is addicted to My Little Pony. I know why people go psychotic - they have to watch 3.5 straight hours of My Little Pony!!!! Kill, must kill, all ponies in the world!!!!!!!!
Okay calming down did not go so well it seems on Sunday, LOL! But, it really did not matter, during the afternoon, I was filling my little pill box with all of my heart pills for this week. When I bent to pick up another bottle ... "click" ... my back went out. First time in I think 5 years! And Kris was down on the floor. No feeling below the waist, all nerves gone, very unpleasant in oh, so many different ways! Just imagine your entire lower body has been set on fire and there is no nerve control what-so-ever! Yes, one does scream at such moments.
So, eventually, I was able to get several vertebrae to pop back into place, but the pain was so horrible beyond description! I took a codeine and checked out from reality ...
From here I am not sure what happened but for some reason I have the feeling that my back going out was actually a blessing from God because I did not have to face Gaelic Girl. I do not know what all went on after I was out for the night. It is just an impression and yes, if I did have to face Gaelic Girl Sunday night it probably would have pushed me over the top. So, I would rather recover from back injuries than another heart attack and all of those darn needles!
So, Friday, completely and utterly conquered by misery and anger. Yeah, I was able to repent and know I was forgiven for failing Him whom I am sworn to serve. And it is not like all aspects of my life are negative, it is just that the negative is so great that it flattens a great many gold stars continually. I do have one positive in my life. Sigh ...
And as expected, my heart began failing, it took quite a few nitro pills to get me through the weekend. The angina, preceding an attack really is not very pleasant. Anger or Angina? I am not sure which is worse - at least anger can be overcome with prayer, not so much angina that I have found.
Sunday, still suffering from the continual angina and guessing I was going to have to go to emergency soon, I just held on and waited to see if it would abate. I kept it a quiet day, well as quiet as you can have babysitting a four year old grand-daughter whom is addicted to My Little Pony. I know why people go psychotic - they have to watch 3.5 straight hours of My Little Pony!!!! Kill, must kill, all ponies in the world!!!!!!!!
Okay calming down did not go so well it seems on Sunday, LOL! But, it really did not matter, during the afternoon, I was filling my little pill box with all of my heart pills for this week. When I bent to pick up another bottle ... "click" ... my back went out. First time in I think 5 years! And Kris was down on the floor. No feeling below the waist, all nerves gone, very unpleasant in oh, so many different ways! Just imagine your entire lower body has been set on fire and there is no nerve control what-so-ever! Yes, one does scream at such moments.
So, eventually, I was able to get several vertebrae to pop back into place, but the pain was so horrible beyond description! I took a codeine and checked out from reality ...
From here I am not sure what happened but for some reason I have the feeling that my back going out was actually a blessing from God because I did not have to face Gaelic Girl. I do not know what all went on after I was out for the night. It is just an impression and yes, if I did have to face Gaelic Girl Sunday night it probably would have pushed me over the top. So, I would rather recover from back injuries than another heart attack and all of those darn needles!
March 3, 2015
Thinking On Prayer
Someday, I would like to do a real study on prayer, but I fear it would turn into a book! There is so much in the Bible on prayer, it must be important to the believer and so why not just look at prayer and Jesus ....
Take a peek at Mark 1:35 as a starting point.
Jesus is praying prior to moments of POWER in His ministry
Matthew 14:22-33 - Jesus is walking on water!
Prayer must play an important part in our ministry!
Without it, yes God will still know our needs, but with no communications we may well not know His desires in our ministry!
No communication will yield no power in our efforts at ministry.
Find a dead body of believers (there are everywhere!) and you will find no prayer!
Prior to TEACHING
Luke 11:1-4
And in answer to a question on prayer, Jesus give us a model to consider ...
In moments of struggle (TEMPTATION)
Matthew 26:36-46
Jesus is struggling with what He know must come to pass.
In like fashion I am tempted, you are tempted, if you call yourself a Christian you are tempted as well! It is only with prayer that we will be able to stand and not fail.
It is only with prayer that when we fail, Jesus will rebuild us (yet again!) and continue to stand between us and His father's fury (God) at our rebellion (sin).
In moments of SUCCESS
Luke 5:15-16
Jesus has plenty of ministry moments, uncountable, and yet he had to take time to pray!
Likewise, we must force ourselves and our busy schedules to allow for prayer, plenty of prayer!
For all of the reasons above and to just THANK God for His faithfulness to us, because He knows we are faithless to Him ...
In times of big DECISIONS
Luke 6:12-13
You are going to read this and go, "What decision?"
And Jesus had made a choice of some type, and what was to follow in His teaching that day was extremely interesting in what he had to say. Continue reading through verse 49 to see what I mean!
In our lives, big decisions require big prayers.
That means you pray as long as it takes for God to answer you!
Yes, you might missed your nightly soap but your life, your ministry, those whom look up to you are too important for you to make ANY choice without knowing God is backing you!
Slightest hesitation in your spirit and it is time to rethink your activities!
Consider these points:
Jesus most likely grew up saying the Shema and the Eighteen Benedictions twice a day.
Jesus calls the Temple a "House of Prayer".
Jesus was faithful in attending Synagogue, "as was His custom". (Luke 4:16)
Prayer played a important part in Jesus' life and it should in yours as well.
Take a peek at Mark 1:35 as a starting point.
Jesus is praying prior to moments of POWER in His ministry
Matthew 14:22-33 - Jesus is walking on water!
Prayer must play an important part in our ministry!
Without it, yes God will still know our needs, but with no communications we may well not know His desires in our ministry!
No communication will yield no power in our efforts at ministry.
Find a dead body of believers (there are everywhere!) and you will find no prayer!
Prior to TEACHING
Luke 11:1-4
And in answer to a question on prayer, Jesus give us a model to consider ...
In moments of struggle (TEMPTATION)
Matthew 26:36-46
Jesus is struggling with what He know must come to pass.
In like fashion I am tempted, you are tempted, if you call yourself a Christian you are tempted as well! It is only with prayer that we will be able to stand and not fail.
It is only with prayer that when we fail, Jesus will rebuild us (yet again!) and continue to stand between us and His father's fury (God) at our rebellion (sin).
In moments of SUCCESS
Luke 5:15-16
Jesus has plenty of ministry moments, uncountable, and yet he had to take time to pray!
Likewise, we must force ourselves and our busy schedules to allow for prayer, plenty of prayer!
For all of the reasons above and to just THANK God for His faithfulness to us, because He knows we are faithless to Him ...
In times of big DECISIONS
Luke 6:12-13
You are going to read this and go, "What decision?"
And Jesus had made a choice of some type, and what was to follow in His teaching that day was extremely interesting in what he had to say. Continue reading through verse 49 to see what I mean!
In our lives, big decisions require big prayers.
That means you pray as long as it takes for God to answer you!
Yes, you might missed your nightly soap but your life, your ministry, those whom look up to you are too important for you to make ANY choice without knowing God is backing you!
Slightest hesitation in your spirit and it is time to rethink your activities!
Consider these points:
Jesus most likely grew up saying the Shema and the Eighteen Benedictions twice a day.
Jesus calls the Temple a "House of Prayer".
Jesus was faithful in attending Synagogue, "as was His custom". (Luke 4:16)
Prayer played a important part in Jesus' life and it should in yours as well.
March 2, 2015
Bad Day
Friday was just a plain bad day.
I woke up due to a dream I was having wherein I had a computer monitor which displayed all of the computers in my domain I was responsible for. My monitor would warn me when one of them was about to go down or had suddenly crashed. My job then was to go and fix the computer, if it had not crashed, or rescue it if it did crash. It was then I realized that the computers were all people and the warning light on my monitor was one of my friends in trouble and I really did not want them to go down hard!
Prayer, lots of prayer, but a very troubled spirit.
So, I hopped on Blogger to reread some of my old posts. Utterly bummed me out because I remember all too well the details behind some of those less than detailed postings.
So, I hopped from the Apple over to my story blog of my father's life. And I tell you, I went straight into depression big time!
I so desperately needed someone ... I was one of those computers about to crash I fear. And I did. Nose dive straight into self pity and anger ... I do not do well with anger, it is Satan's major access route into me.
Once I had calmed downed, I wrote what is tomorrow's post on prayer. It helped. But, I have been badly damaged internally from this - three nitros in 24 hours and my heart is still not stable. No doubt I will end up in the hospital at some point this week if this episode does not stop - for now I fear that stress is winning.
And if stress wins, then my foot and leg reconstruction surgery will be pushed back even further than June. Sigh, there is just no winning when you are me.
I woke up due to a dream I was having wherein I had a computer monitor which displayed all of the computers in my domain I was responsible for. My monitor would warn me when one of them was about to go down or had suddenly crashed. My job then was to go and fix the computer, if it had not crashed, or rescue it if it did crash. It was then I realized that the computers were all people and the warning light on my monitor was one of my friends in trouble and I really did not want them to go down hard!
Prayer, lots of prayer, but a very troubled spirit.
So, I hopped on Blogger to reread some of my old posts. Utterly bummed me out because I remember all too well the details behind some of those less than detailed postings.
So, I hopped from the Apple over to my story blog of my father's life. And I tell you, I went straight into depression big time!
I so desperately needed someone ... I was one of those computers about to crash I fear. And I did. Nose dive straight into self pity and anger ... I do not do well with anger, it is Satan's major access route into me.
Once I had calmed downed, I wrote what is tomorrow's post on prayer. It helped. But, I have been badly damaged internally from this - three nitros in 24 hours and my heart is still not stable. No doubt I will end up in the hospital at some point this week if this episode does not stop - for now I fear that stress is winning.
And if stress wins, then my foot and leg reconstruction surgery will be pushed back even further than June. Sigh, there is just no winning when you are me.
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