You how you sometimes obsess about something, imagining the worst, expecting it and then ... nothing comes true at all?
That is how the first of the PT visits went. I was imaging the worse all weekend long, that muscle bound goliath of a woman was going to wring my ankle like a chicken's neck. I was unsure how I could endure it - without my old nature. Yeah, old Kris could be hurt but pain was completely ignorable, if I wanted it to be. Very handy when having a root canal and the nerve killer had failed to take. Eh, whatever, it is only pain.
I even had practiced my mooing so I could be a reasonable smart ass when the chicken started to die! Okay my sick demented mind, I know ...
But, unexpected was that the treatment was nothing more than the creation and fitting of a foam brace to support the foot, ankle and leg to the knee. Then layered with six bands of varying strengths of pull. In all a big nothing.
Oh make no mistake, it is painful but I still seem to be able to manage that pain's existence out of my mind. So, no worries right? Well tomorrow we do this all over again with the added enjoyment of wring my foot, ankle and knee out - then back into the foam cast again.
I really hope this works, she believes that the foot should almost be normal sized once the excessive fluid is dealt with. Well normal is relative - how many have Sasquatch size feet after-all as their old size!
Yahoo, there might be a real shoe in my not so distant future!
September 30, 2015
September 29, 2015
About Last Weekend
It simply amazes me at how you can go to the movies and walk out shaking you head while muttering under your breath, "That could never happen in real life ...".
Oh yeah? Well, last weekend if real life was committed to film would either be not shown due to being so completely unbelievable or labelled as a sick comedy ...
In perspective, I could easily start killing Oregonians for they were as a group about a narcissistic a bunch as you would ever hope to avoid in life. It would shame me to even recount some of what went on - in public - that more than once I was left with the choice of either walking on or taking a person's head off - literally. And you never have a machete around when you need one, do you! I had to just keep reminding myself that this individual, as demented and sick as they were, was someone whom Jesus sacrificed His life for. I am utterly stunned at the sheer level of paganism and debauchery to be observed, much less the less than civilized behavior. Icky! And were I to relay those observations on to you - well, I would be labelled an adults only site by Blogger! Oregon's culture has a real problem ...
And I always enjoy a good train wreck and the weekend provided one of those. I took a cruise on the Columbia River on a sternwheeler boat! It was great fun! It was a dinner cruise but I was so worn out that at most I could enjoy it from the standpoint of not having anywhere to walk! Just kick my foot up and relax drinking hot tea. The meal was okay but not special.
Next to me was a couple obviously on their first date, local, middle aged. She was aware she had gotten stuck with a "player", whom was both rude and obnoxious. He needed a machete trim job, just not his whole head ... They ordered drinks about the time he became aware that the evening was over. He ordered a coke, she a Scotch. When the waitress returned, the woman commented that she wanted the entire bottle and his ears perked up. Across the evening, as the scotch was depleted by her, so were her inhibitions. They wandered off, she in a drunken stupor, and apparently found a secluded spot. And ... she even knew he was a player ... Sigh.
Of course, what is a Kris trip if not a disaster for me personally? Yeah, someone cut one of my radiator hoses, probably when I had an oil change that first morning when I left Seattle. So, Saturday was spent roaming around The Dalles, Oregon trying to find an open repair shop. I did not bring any tools since I can not do anything physically any longer. God was gracious and I did find a new hose, antifreeze and a guy working on a car in his backyard. A twenty convinced him that he could do the job.
About now, I got the hiccups, oh not just any old normal hiccup but something my sister called co-hickle-burps, because I would cough, then hiccup and burp all at the same time. Very painful! So, after three days of this I had to go find some muscle relaxants so I could sleep! Yeah, those hiccups were straight on every 7 seconds for three solid days! Argh! Though they did shut down the hiccups, I think I am still hung over :(
During one conversation, I suddenly realized that my memory is missing. Four months ago, no problems with my memory but at the surgery point backwards, I have little or no memories at all now! Names of family - gone, my mother's tribe - gone, almost nothing! All wiped clean. There are bits and pieces I do remember - most of it I wish not, seeing at how life has been as of late. Once told something I seem to retain it well enough, even then remembering new details not told. So it is like the key to any given memory is gone, but once reminded I can then recall almost all on that subject. Something to talk to the doc about one of these days.
And the final disaster was finding myself in an altercation where I chose not to defend myself but just be the new me. My attacker was to say at the very least surprised and ended the altercation stating that they did not appreciate this aberration pretending to me ... Cool, Kris, is observantly different :) But, it was so unexpected that maybe old Kris would have been unprepared as well. So much I need to know and grow into, it seems insurmountable at time!
So, the Dalles were fun. Maryhill Museum spectacular but not the displays. The riverboat cruise was the best part! But, Portland, honestly who needs another Amsterdam or Zurich on the face of this Earth? (shudder!)
Oh yeah? Well, last weekend if real life was committed to film would either be not shown due to being so completely unbelievable or labelled as a sick comedy ...
In perspective, I could easily start killing Oregonians for they were as a group about a narcissistic a bunch as you would ever hope to avoid in life. It would shame me to even recount some of what went on - in public - that more than once I was left with the choice of either walking on or taking a person's head off - literally. And you never have a machete around when you need one, do you! I had to just keep reminding myself that this individual, as demented and sick as they were, was someone whom Jesus sacrificed His life for. I am utterly stunned at the sheer level of paganism and debauchery to be observed, much less the less than civilized behavior. Icky! And were I to relay those observations on to you - well, I would be labelled an adults only site by Blogger! Oregon's culture has a real problem ...
And I always enjoy a good train wreck and the weekend provided one of those. I took a cruise on the Columbia River on a sternwheeler boat! It was great fun! It was a dinner cruise but I was so worn out that at most I could enjoy it from the standpoint of not having anywhere to walk! Just kick my foot up and relax drinking hot tea. The meal was okay but not special.
Next to me was a couple obviously on their first date, local, middle aged. She was aware she had gotten stuck with a "player", whom was both rude and obnoxious. He needed a machete trim job, just not his whole head ... They ordered drinks about the time he became aware that the evening was over. He ordered a coke, she a Scotch. When the waitress returned, the woman commented that she wanted the entire bottle and his ears perked up. Across the evening, as the scotch was depleted by her, so were her inhibitions. They wandered off, she in a drunken stupor, and apparently found a secluded spot. And ... she even knew he was a player ... Sigh.
Of course, what is a Kris trip if not a disaster for me personally? Yeah, someone cut one of my radiator hoses, probably when I had an oil change that first morning when I left Seattle. So, Saturday was spent roaming around The Dalles, Oregon trying to find an open repair shop. I did not bring any tools since I can not do anything physically any longer. God was gracious and I did find a new hose, antifreeze and a guy working on a car in his backyard. A twenty convinced him that he could do the job.
About now, I got the hiccups, oh not just any old normal hiccup but something my sister called co-hickle-burps, because I would cough, then hiccup and burp all at the same time. Very painful! So, after three days of this I had to go find some muscle relaxants so I could sleep! Yeah, those hiccups were straight on every 7 seconds for three solid days! Argh! Though they did shut down the hiccups, I think I am still hung over :(
During one conversation, I suddenly realized that my memory is missing. Four months ago, no problems with my memory but at the surgery point backwards, I have little or no memories at all now! Names of family - gone, my mother's tribe - gone, almost nothing! All wiped clean. There are bits and pieces I do remember - most of it I wish not, seeing at how life has been as of late. Once told something I seem to retain it well enough, even then remembering new details not told. So it is like the key to any given memory is gone, but once reminded I can then recall almost all on that subject. Something to talk to the doc about one of these days.
And the final disaster was finding myself in an altercation where I chose not to defend myself but just be the new me. My attacker was to say at the very least surprised and ended the altercation stating that they did not appreciate this aberration pretending to me ... Cool, Kris, is observantly different :) But, it was so unexpected that maybe old Kris would have been unprepared as well. So much I need to know and grow into, it seems insurmountable at time!
So, the Dalles were fun. Maryhill Museum spectacular but not the displays. The riverboat cruise was the best part! But, Portland, honestly who needs another Amsterdam or Zurich on the face of this Earth? (shudder!)
September 28, 2015
El Niño
All of the talk here in the northwest of the USA is about El Niño, an offshore flow of warm water. Half of the pundits are screaming about how there will be no snows and water restrictions must be implemented now if the salmon will have water next year. Other half are buying snow tires and chains.
So, an internet search shows that there were moderate El Niño events in:
2002/3
2009/10
Strong El Niño none since the 1970's
Very Strong El Niño in none since 1997
Now we know that the El Niño flow which messes up the weather here in he Northwest is cyclical - every six to seven years it pops up. So, is 2015/6 in the range? Yes.
The last moderate El Niño was in 2009/10 winter. So, this winter or next winter would be a candidate for a moderate or stronger event.
So what does happen when there is an El Niño winter?
Historically, heavy rains and high snow accumulation! So ... yeah the numbers do look like snow in the the future of this winter - December and/or January. This last event buried Seattle under 9.5 inches of snow in January 2010 and December 2009 was a real soaker, almost 9 inches of rain as well!
So how can the pundits be screaming for water restrictions?
Because the Northwest has lost most of its permanent snow pack and glaciers are in full retreat, so there is little water reserve. If no snow, if no hard rains as previous El Niño winters have produced, well then preservation of what there is available is a must.
So, both sides of the pundit groups are leaning towards to their concept of the correct! Do you gamble that the snows and rains are coming or do you preserve? Do you buy snow tires and chains or skip it? Do you check out your heavy winter gear or not put away your summer clothes?
There is only one correct answer and I prefer to never gamble - I am buying snow tires in November ...
Last weekend, I was down on the Columbia river, where it is apparent that the Columbia is about 9 feet lower than in the recent past. Food for thought.
So, an internet search shows that there were moderate El Niño events in:
2002/3
2009/10
Strong El Niño none since the 1970's
Very Strong El Niño in none since 1997
Now we know that the El Niño flow which messes up the weather here in he Northwest is cyclical - every six to seven years it pops up. So, is 2015/6 in the range? Yes.
The last moderate El Niño was in 2009/10 winter. So, this winter or next winter would be a candidate for a moderate or stronger event.
So what does happen when there is an El Niño winter?
Historically, heavy rains and high snow accumulation! So ... yeah the numbers do look like snow in the the future of this winter - December and/or January. This last event buried Seattle under 9.5 inches of snow in January 2010 and December 2009 was a real soaker, almost 9 inches of rain as well!
So how can the pundits be screaming for water restrictions?
Because the Northwest has lost most of its permanent snow pack and glaciers are in full retreat, so there is little water reserve. If no snow, if no hard rains as previous El Niño winters have produced, well then preservation of what there is available is a must.
So, both sides of the pundit groups are leaning towards to their concept of the correct! Do you gamble that the snows and rains are coming or do you preserve? Do you buy snow tires and chains or skip it? Do you check out your heavy winter gear or not put away your summer clothes?
There is only one correct answer and I prefer to never gamble - I am buying snow tires in November ...
Last weekend, I was down on the Columbia river, where it is apparent that the Columbia is about 9 feet lower than in the recent past. Food for thought.
September 26, 2015
Musical Saturday Morning
So randomly skipping around Youtube looking for a song for this morning and yeah, I was to be reminded of my senior year of high school. No one had ever heard of Alice Cooper, much less what was an Alice Cooper?
The song was extremely popular not only as a song but as a concept as well! A heck of a lot better song than: A Horse With No Name or DOA, the other top songs of the year - which were played ad nauseam!
So, from 1972, a very lost Alice Cooper breaking into the big time ... which would eventually lead him right back to where he needed to be along - at the foot of the cross. :)
(my original 1972 copy was blocked over the weekend, oh well, here is a different and nowhere near as good a copy ...)
The song was extremely popular not only as a song but as a concept as well! A heck of a lot better song than: A Horse With No Name or DOA, the other top songs of the year - which were played ad nauseam!
So, from 1972, a very lost Alice Cooper breaking into the big time ... which would eventually lead him right back to where he needed to be along - at the foot of the cross. :)
(my original 1972 copy was blocked over the weekend, oh well, here is a different and nowhere near as good a copy ...)
September 25, 2015
Waiting
Patience has not historically been exactly a strong suite of mine. Nothing is more frustrating than having to wait and wait and wait and wait! And it seems that is what has defined almost all aspects of my life for the past six years.
As I have thought about these past several years, and I have had plenty of time to do so!, I am struck at how God has tested me bit by bit in this area.
Originally, it was all shrouded in situations. Random events that required me to draw upon something far greater than me to accomplish whatever the task. And just when it looks like I will succeed ... yeah, well that success is snatched away. I really do not understand this last piece of the puzzle. I already understand failure, I have a lifetime of people telling me how stupid I am, how I can never hope to compete, how I should never even try ...
And yet God challenges me time and time again - to wait. To frustrate me beyond all reality at the hopelessness of a situation - and to wait on Him. Wait, wait, wait, wait! Oh, if you want to actually complete something to its conclusion - sorry: the lesson here is to wait.
Sigh.
I think I am pretty good at waiting now.
Sigh.
So, I see this year wrapping up. A year of nothing but doctors, surgeries, emergency rooms, beds and looking at my foot up in the air ... Yeah, I still have four months to go to get out of this year and on with my life - assuming of course, that this foot is able to stop being the center of attention!
I have friends whom want to go metal detecting.
I have a friend whom wants me to go help bury his mother - she is still in the trunk of his car.
(yeah, that sounds weird but she was cremated!)
I have pages of things to do requiring two feet!
And let us not forget that even part time employment would help greatly!
And I am waiting ... waiting ... waiting on God to move, to do whatever it is that is required for Kris to restart life. I want to, I am ready, I need to ...
As Dutchman observed several months back, none of this may have anything to do with me - I am just the tool being used to deal with Gaelic Girl. Oh joy! Only God would think He could alter GG's path - especially using me - scum of the Earth! But, hey, I am not God, I am just the tool, right? Can anything alter a greying flaming red haired Irish girl's path?
Well, whatever the purpose, I sure hope this is over soon ... I am going stir crazy!
As I have thought about these past several years, and I have had plenty of time to do so!, I am struck at how God has tested me bit by bit in this area.
Originally, it was all shrouded in situations. Random events that required me to draw upon something far greater than me to accomplish whatever the task. And just when it looks like I will succeed ... yeah, well that success is snatched away. I really do not understand this last piece of the puzzle. I already understand failure, I have a lifetime of people telling me how stupid I am, how I can never hope to compete, how I should never even try ...
And yet God challenges me time and time again - to wait. To frustrate me beyond all reality at the hopelessness of a situation - and to wait on Him. Wait, wait, wait, wait! Oh, if you want to actually complete something to its conclusion - sorry: the lesson here is to wait.
Sigh.
I think I am pretty good at waiting now.
Sigh.
So, I see this year wrapping up. A year of nothing but doctors, surgeries, emergency rooms, beds and looking at my foot up in the air ... Yeah, I still have four months to go to get out of this year and on with my life - assuming of course, that this foot is able to stop being the center of attention!
I have friends whom want to go metal detecting.
I have a friend whom wants me to go help bury his mother - she is still in the trunk of his car.
(yeah, that sounds weird but she was cremated!)
I have pages of things to do requiring two feet!
And let us not forget that even part time employment would help greatly!
And I am waiting ... waiting ... waiting on God to move, to do whatever it is that is required for Kris to restart life. I want to, I am ready, I need to ...
As Dutchman observed several months back, none of this may have anything to do with me - I am just the tool being used to deal with Gaelic Girl. Oh joy! Only God would think He could alter GG's path - especially using me - scum of the Earth! But, hey, I am not God, I am just the tool, right? Can anything alter a greying flaming red haired Irish girl's path?
Well, whatever the purpose, I sure hope this is over soon ... I am going stir crazy!
September 24, 2015
Blogging, Posts, Life
Once a month I check all of the statistics on my blogs. I commented that last time I did this I was seeing for the first time there were more I-Phone readers than computer readers! It surprised me greatly. I see people playing all of the time on their smart phones but my phone I fear is still a phone. Yeah, it makes calls and takes texts from my oldest grand-daughter.
This past month I-Phone has surged way above computer based systems. Well, it is flattering that people want to follow using their phones, it is sad the days of the PC seem to be numbered. Any chance that real computers will make a resurgence? Nah ... the PC mentality is a disease.
Anyway, for the past month, also for the first time, the number of US readers has passed by foreign readership. And for the first time ever, no Swiss readers at all! I do not know why. Strange. And the Russians seem to still just love my father's memories (Albert Arthur Plattner).
And the most popular post of all time, remains unchallenged. When I wrote it I never could have suspected that it would have such an attraction to people. It is just stories about friends whom were able to find love against all odds.
*****
I am slowly resurrecting my old art blog, so slow, so painful! Not to be a braggart, but I have been sort of surprised at how good some of those old paintings look. Yeah, they all need work but when I think of what I just saw at the Washington State Fair in their painting division, well, yeah, they needed a bit of work as well! And many of them are "masters". No, not comparing myself, I have much to re-learn, learn and accomplish, but it seems a decade ago I was on the right road. Now if only I had not allowed life to run over the top of me!
*****
I continue to work on the rewrite of my recipe site. Between trying to redo the recipes to be more diabetic friendly, I have had to rewrite the posts because something in MicroSquish land changed Word to create XML instead of HTML. I know HTML, XML is just painful to maintenance. Sigh. So, it is going slowly on that one.
*****
Almost all of the posts for this week were written a week or more ago as I am headed off to Oregon on Thursday, through Monday. This might be fun or it might be confrontational, just the same as a similar trip in 2013, I am not comfortable with this trip at all. And like that trip, perhaps this might be just be a groaner and of no value at all. Oh well, we will see, taking plenty of nitro with me ...
*****
I am sitting here in a normal pair of shoes. No big deal you think, but it is a first since 2013! No, the foot still has far to go but the swelling is down so far that my right foot will finally squeeze into a XXX deep and high oversize shoe! It feels weird and I do not like it, I want to have my brace back on! But, I am cleaning the brace: I have the insert air-drying and will be Lysol spraying the boot itself. So, a day or two of limping around in a shoe.
This cleaning is for the trip coming up. Be nice to have a brace without food splattered all over it! LOL
*****
Well, I have tons to do!
Ciao!
This past month I-Phone has surged way above computer based systems. Well, it is flattering that people want to follow using their phones, it is sad the days of the PC seem to be numbered. Any chance that real computers will make a resurgence? Nah ... the PC mentality is a disease.
Anyway, for the past month, also for the first time, the number of US readers has passed by foreign readership. And for the first time ever, no Swiss readers at all! I do not know why. Strange. And the Russians seem to still just love my father's memories (Albert Arthur Plattner).
And the most popular post of all time, remains unchallenged. When I wrote it I never could have suspected that it would have such an attraction to people. It is just stories about friends whom were able to find love against all odds.
*****
I am slowly resurrecting my old art blog, so slow, so painful! Not to be a braggart, but I have been sort of surprised at how good some of those old paintings look. Yeah, they all need work but when I think of what I just saw at the Washington State Fair in their painting division, well, yeah, they needed a bit of work as well! And many of them are "masters". No, not comparing myself, I have much to re-learn, learn and accomplish, but it seems a decade ago I was on the right road. Now if only I had not allowed life to run over the top of me!
*****
I continue to work on the rewrite of my recipe site. Between trying to redo the recipes to be more diabetic friendly, I have had to rewrite the posts because something in MicroSquish land changed Word to create XML instead of HTML. I know HTML, XML is just painful to maintenance. Sigh. So, it is going slowly on that one.
*****
Almost all of the posts for this week were written a week or more ago as I am headed off to Oregon on Thursday, through Monday. This might be fun or it might be confrontational, just the same as a similar trip in 2013, I am not comfortable with this trip at all. And like that trip, perhaps this might be just be a groaner and of no value at all. Oh well, we will see, taking plenty of nitro with me ...
*****
I am sitting here in a normal pair of shoes. No big deal you think, but it is a first since 2013! No, the foot still has far to go but the swelling is down so far that my right foot will finally squeeze into a XXX deep and high oversize shoe! It feels weird and I do not like it, I want to have my brace back on! But, I am cleaning the brace: I have the insert air-drying and will be Lysol spraying the boot itself. So, a day or two of limping around in a shoe.
This cleaning is for the trip coming up. Be nice to have a brace without food splattered all over it! LOL
*****
Well, I have tons to do!
Ciao!
September 23, 2015
Do They Have A Soul?
"But, do they really have a soul?"
The question posed concerning the Neanderthal issue.
We have a series of studies running in Genesis right now, so life the universe and everything are on the table.
You have Man, just like you and me. Made in the image of God, given a soul, Jesus died for you!
But, we have an ancestor, the Neanderthal. Oh wait! Man has been around just as long as the Neanderthal. They interbred with us. We are the Neanderthal! Or what is left of them in any event.
Neanderthal's can be proven to have taken human wives, children were born from these unions (we have the family graves!), they practiced a very telling form of burial - red ochre and the body laid on flowers, they cooked, they ate baked bread, they made weapons, they made music and had flutes, they created cave art!, they sculpted small figures from stone of great delicacy, a sufficient number of pierced shells make one wonder if they wore necklaces, we have even found what appears to be a weapons factory!, one site even has an obvious hot tub built inside a cave! Outside of their brow ridge, they are as human in their behaviors as you or I. And concurrent with ancient man.
The Neanderthals were almost worldwide - except for the America's. No evidence has ever been found of anything Neanderthal in the new world.
Always pictured hairier than most humans (they have to be pictured as ape like), usually with a stupid expression on their face and a slack open mouth (they have to be stupider than us). Got to look dumber than the ultimate creation after all! But, what if Neanderthal was smarter than Mankind?
Remember that odd reference in Genesis to the Nephilim? No? Then check out Genesis 6:4 for the Bible's almost offhand remark that there was something else at one time ... other than just God's creation running around.
After I became a Christian, I was very happy to equate the Nephilim with the Neanderthal. It works well. Man preceded them and archaeology supports that. Man was not a descendent of the Neanderthal from the aspect of evolution but only from the point of procreation. And aside from the fact that you and I do carry a percentage of Neanderthal DNA, they were wiped from the Earth.
So, do they have souls?
Well, I assume that their DNA was similar enough to ours to make their babies. If they are the product of women and angelic beings, then again the DNA issue has to be assumed. So, if they fall within the classification of MAN - they would have to have a soul!
But, I want to emphasize something here - their burials. Burials mean that there is some thought of an afterlife, some meaning to life of more than just today is all there is ... The bodies were buried on beds of flowers and then covered in red ochre. Burial is not something which happens outside of man. And as for the flowers? I am sure there are lots of ideas, even I can think of a few just off the top of my head, but that does not make this practice have those meanings. To cover the smell of decay, to call for spring and the renewing of life, etc. However, the red ochre is even more interesting ...
Red Ochre - Red Earth - a symbol of what? Did you know that ADOM, associated with ADAM, means red? Was the burial of the dead with the ochre to equate them back to Adam, the first man? To claim that they were MAN and not an abomination? One has to wonder. This practice was even to spread throughout the middle eastern burials of just plain old mankind. Who started this practice? We will never know but it seems that the Neanderthal greatly predates the practice by man.
But, this is a Kris-ism, something I think from my own investigations. I can be wrong, it has happened before, so just sharing what I know and suspect at this time ...
I think the Neanderthal were a variety of humans, created by human women and angles, and ultimately removed by God.
The question posed concerning the Neanderthal issue.
We have a series of studies running in Genesis right now, so life the universe and everything are on the table.
You have Man, just like you and me. Made in the image of God, given a soul, Jesus died for you!
Neanderthal's can be proven to have taken human wives, children were born from these unions (we have the family graves!), they practiced a very telling form of burial - red ochre and the body laid on flowers, they cooked, they ate baked bread, they made weapons, they made music and had flutes, they created cave art!, they sculpted small figures from stone of great delicacy, a sufficient number of pierced shells make one wonder if they wore necklaces, we have even found what appears to be a weapons factory!, one site even has an obvious hot tub built inside a cave! Outside of their brow ridge, they are as human in their behaviors as you or I. And concurrent with ancient man.
The Neanderthals were almost worldwide - except for the America's. No evidence has ever been found of anything Neanderthal in the new world.
Always pictured hairier than most humans (they have to be pictured as ape like), usually with a stupid expression on their face and a slack open mouth (they have to be stupider than us). Got to look dumber than the ultimate creation after all! But, what if Neanderthal was smarter than Mankind?
Remember that odd reference in Genesis to the Nephilim? No? Then check out Genesis 6:4 for the Bible's almost offhand remark that there was something else at one time ... other than just God's creation running around.
After I became a Christian, I was very happy to equate the Nephilim with the Neanderthal. It works well. Man preceded them and archaeology supports that. Man was not a descendent of the Neanderthal from the aspect of evolution but only from the point of procreation. And aside from the fact that you and I do carry a percentage of Neanderthal DNA, they were wiped from the Earth.
So, do they have souls?
Well, I assume that their DNA was similar enough to ours to make their babies. If they are the product of women and angelic beings, then again the DNA issue has to be assumed. So, if they fall within the classification of MAN - they would have to have a soul!
But, I want to emphasize something here - their burials. Burials mean that there is some thought of an afterlife, some meaning to life of more than just today is all there is ... The bodies were buried on beds of flowers and then covered in red ochre. Burial is not something which happens outside of man. And as for the flowers? I am sure there are lots of ideas, even I can think of a few just off the top of my head, but that does not make this practice have those meanings. To cover the smell of decay, to call for spring and the renewing of life, etc. However, the red ochre is even more interesting ...
Red Ochre - Red Earth - a symbol of what? Did you know that ADOM, associated with ADAM, means red? Was the burial of the dead with the ochre to equate them back to Adam, the first man? To claim that they were MAN and not an abomination? One has to wonder. This practice was even to spread throughout the middle eastern burials of just plain old mankind. Who started this practice? We will never know but it seems that the Neanderthal greatly predates the practice by man.
But, this is a Kris-ism, something I think from my own investigations. I can be wrong, it has happened before, so just sharing what I know and suspect at this time ...
I think the Neanderthal were a variety of humans, created by human women and angles, and ultimately removed by God.
September 22, 2015
Standing Against Culture
Mark 8:34
Everyone is correctly proclaiming Jesus as the Messiah. But, that Messiah, is a physical warrior/king of a physical kingdom - the one whom would drive the hated Romans out! But Jesus plainly told them, He was to die.
Deny Yourself
This is literal!
Jesus expects you to do this because:
Again this is literal!
The cross - an instrument of pain, without ceasing, until you die!
What cross are you to carry?
Well it is not a disease, it is not hardship, it is not heavy traffic, teenage children, psycho mothers, horrible friends, a bad marriage, etc.
It is what ever you directly bare for His sake alone.
It is what makes you a disciple ...
It is what may likely kill you.
Follow Jesus
A Christian is not passive, active being like Jesus.
Know that you will be called to do what He has already done.
And, that is a fair bit if you think about it.
Everyone is correctly proclaiming Jesus as the Messiah. But, that Messiah, is a physical warrior/king of a physical kingdom - the one whom would drive the hated Romans out! But Jesus plainly told them, He was to die.
Deny Yourself
This is literal!
Jesus expects you to do this because:
- You are prone to execution, just like Me
- You can only be saved when you stop trying to save yourself
Again this is literal!
The cross - an instrument of pain, without ceasing, until you die!
What cross are you to carry?
Well it is not a disease, it is not hardship, it is not heavy traffic, teenage children, psycho mothers, horrible friends, a bad marriage, etc.
It is what ever you directly bare for His sake alone.
It is what makes you a disciple ...
It is what may likely kill you.
Follow Jesus
- Lose your life
- Not gain the world
- Not denying Jesus
A Christian is not passive, active being like Jesus.
Know that you will be called to do what He has already done.
And, that is a fair bit if you think about it.
September 21, 2015
Zombie-fest
Down the road from me is a small community of Normandy Park. Once a haven for the rich an still is to a certain extent, it certainly has turned odd across the past two years!
I was driving past Normandy Park when I saw all of these tents and a big sign saying to get your Zombie accessories there ... Zombies????? A little further down the road and there were signs for parking at the local police training center - for the Zombie-fest! And, buses running you then down to the town center so you can become part of the Zombie experience.
What the heck!?!?!?!?!?!
I have to admit that as a kid I saw a zombie movie, snorted loudly and walked out! I just was never into shock or horror films! I love Godzilla and other silly monster movies as long as they are entertaining. A quick check on the internet and I note there are more than 400 zombie movies from countries all over the world! Zombie movies, are not entertaining they are there for shock value or to instill fear. But, there are obviously people whom are attracted to these films ...
So, people in rich-land want to pretend they are zombies and walk around a parking lot. They have costume contests and I am sure many more events - I am just clueless what they could be - just as I am clueless at how people with a mind can be drawn to this kind of "stuff".
So, I found it interesting that my little town, where sidewalks are rolled up at 5:00 every evening, was a moving mass of people! What the heck? What could all of these people be doing roaming the streets and shops, most of which were closed? Then I started recognizing some of the faces as I sat at a stop light, crossing the street, residents from Normandy Park! LOL! Oh, that was so funny, to think that the silent majority just left town to the hordes of zombies.
I do own a few zombie movies: Shaun of the Dead (so BAD it funny!), World War Z (not too bad) and of course Plan 9 From Outer space (the worse of the worse!). I rarely watch them, only when I want to chuckle heartily over a bowl of popcorn.
I know I have beat the concept of movies and TV shows which deal in fear to death before, so I will only sum up the conclusion: Satan is the originator of fear, fear can separate you from God, Satan wins. One of the reasons I do not see most genres of movies and never TV!
I was driving past Normandy Park when I saw all of these tents and a big sign saying to get your Zombie accessories there ... Zombies????? A little further down the road and there were signs for parking at the local police training center - for the Zombie-fest! And, buses running you then down to the town center so you can become part of the Zombie experience.
What the heck!?!?!?!?!?!
So, people in rich-land want to pretend they are zombies and walk around a parking lot. They have costume contests and I am sure many more events - I am just clueless what they could be - just as I am clueless at how people with a mind can be drawn to this kind of "stuff".
So, I found it interesting that my little town, where sidewalks are rolled up at 5:00 every evening, was a moving mass of people! What the heck? What could all of these people be doing roaming the streets and shops, most of which were closed? Then I started recognizing some of the faces as I sat at a stop light, crossing the street, residents from Normandy Park! LOL! Oh, that was so funny, to think that the silent majority just left town to the hordes of zombies.
I do own a few zombie movies: Shaun of the Dead (so BAD it funny!), World War Z (not too bad) and of course Plan 9 From Outer space (the worse of the worse!). I rarely watch them, only when I want to chuckle heartily over a bowl of popcorn.
I know I have beat the concept of movies and TV shows which deal in fear to death before, so I will only sum up the conclusion: Satan is the originator of fear, fear can separate you from God, Satan wins. One of the reasons I do not see most genres of movies and never TV!
September 19, 2015
Musical Saturday Morning
Do you know how hard it is to find a praise song which has not been turned into a performance? I spent hours and finally settled on this one - but it is still in preformance mode, but at least it did not make me gag quite as much! God has little to do with man showing off for others.
I even tried to find a Mennonite version of Opus Dei - the Work of God, which is really what I wanted but a 12 word song must be strung out for 10 to 15 minutes it seems.
Pathetic ...
I wanted to celebrate God's victory over this body, to shout from the roof tops about God's Work, His deeds, His healing! But, it seems it is only the intention of my heart, which you can not see but at least I can tell you about ...
September 18, 2015
Thinking of Joseph
This is Thursday's original post, which I rescheduled due to the unexpectedness of what was to happen at the surgeons yesterday! It is most fitting the way it worked out. I had to go through the thinking about examples in the Bible what could be learned from them about my situation. I chose Joseph to write about and then Thursday's post happened! A miracle, on top of miracle, on top of God then telling me all about it and giving me hope ...
Genesis 41
Joseph, spent 13 years as a slave in Egypt.
Then tossed into prison by his owner on false charges.
In prison for two years now after he helped one of the other prisoners whom promised to help Joseph for interpreting a dream.
Well best of intentions ...
And Joseph continues in prison.
Called to interpret Pharaoh's dream.
Having done so, is rewarded.
Amongst promises of God:
Job 23
Job 23:10 - you will be as gold.
A process of month after month after year after year of nothingness as we are created into what God wants us to be.
Not pleasant, time consuming, faith numbing and all will attempt to correct you, to put you back on the right path - but God has you where He wants you. ARGH! So matter the circumstance, no matter the method, He is using on you - you have to stay the course you are on until shown/told otherwise. Sigh ...
Joseph really had no choices. He was betrayed by his brothers, sold into slavery, imprisoned and finally rewarded - but that was a mighty hard 15 years on him!
Genesis 41
Joseph, spent 13 years as a slave in Egypt.
Then tossed into prison by his owner on false charges.
In prison for two years now after he helped one of the other prisoners whom promised to help Joseph for interpreting a dream.
Well best of intentions ...
And Joseph continues in prison.
Called to interpret Pharaoh's dream.
Having done so, is rewarded.
Amongst promises of God:
- You will be refined.
- Hope at the end of affliction.
- "Trust me."
Job 23
- "Why?"
- "How long must I suffer?"
- "Where is he?"
Job 23:10 - you will be as gold.
- Character
- Quality
- Value
A process of month after month after year after year of nothingness as we are created into what God wants us to be.
Not pleasant, time consuming, faith numbing and all will attempt to correct you, to put you back on the right path - but God has you where He wants you. ARGH! So matter the circumstance, no matter the method, He is using on you - you have to stay the course you are on until shown/told otherwise. Sigh ...
Joseph really had no choices. He was betrayed by his brothers, sold into slavery, imprisoned and finally rewarded - but that was a mighty hard 15 years on him!
September 17, 2015
Celebration!
This is a replacement post for what I had planned for today, written and scheduled!
It is important to me that I share my victories and blessings and not just whine about life! Victory came most unexpectedly yesterday ...
I had a series of doctors' appointments yesterday, so Swede was coming down from Everett to drive me around. Only he never showed up and did not call either! Most unlike him! He is an engineer, if you looked up any aerospace engineer in a dictionary - his photo would be pasted there! Sometime it is just too funny the way in which he is so atypical, an engineer. I texted him and took off walking for the hospital where the first doctor, the infectious disease doctor is.
I also called his office to tell them I would be late since I was walking. It is only four blocks to the hospital but it still took 30 minutes due to the leg problems. But, I made it in record time - utterly exhausted. Everything is still good with the body, no signs of a re-infection. But, it seems that foot is now showing signs of a failure with the lymph system. Is there no end to this!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!!
I stopped off at the Physical Therapy place, which apparently does evaluations for lymph system disorders - I have no idea as to why. I was to learn that it is because there are so many women with breast cancer around here that they do this task and then treat in house. I get a packet of paper to fill out am told there is an evaluation appointment available in the afternoon and I am done with them!
By now it is lunchtime so I head off to my favorite Mexican place for lunch and text the still silent Swede that I am now walking there from the hospital, a distance of perhaps a half mile. He texts back that is already there. And I think ... "What the heck?". But as I walk along I am trying to remember back over 40 years ago and my medical training when I was in high school. I was a part of Rocky Mountain Search and Rescue back then, we were the para-medics of the day in Colorado. I had to admit there was little I could recall.
I make it about 100 yards from the door of the hospital when I see his little sports car turn on to the street I am walking down and roar past me, pull a U-Turn and then slide to a stop. I hop in and he is so apologetic! It seems he had written down 1:00 rather than 10:00 as my appointment time so he drove like a demon to get down to my little Burg and figured where ever I was, I would be doing Mexican food for lunch! LOL, I guess he knows me.
Over lunch, Swede and I chatted while I fill out reams of paperwork and ate. He had no ideas on the lymph system either and really wanted to talk about the new launch site Blue Origin is building in Florida ... perhaps he is thinking of coming out of retirement? Certainly, he is bored enough as witnessed by his driving down to see me weekly!
The bone doctor was next. New x-rays shot, one of his interns came in, yakked a bit and then left. About an hour later my surgeon comes in - I have not seen him since May when he was doing the titanium structure on me that failed a month later. I figured he was mad at me for destroying his fine work! But, he is happy, very happy, even jovial!
So the short of it:
But, the titanium beam in the foot has failed and for now should be no problem. It just means my dream of being a ballerina will never happen now - sigh ... LOL!
He is happy because I am the exception. Only .5% of what I have gone through end up keeping any part of their leg, ankle or foot! And I get to keep all three! He even said that, "I had lost all hope for you because we started with a disaster, the attempts to save the foot and rebuild it failed, and yet - (he is waving the x-rays around now) - there is foot! Come back and see me in three weeks."
I was walking on air as I went to the physical therapy place. I was run through their tests as I told them about the year and its trauma. The person admitted she had never heard of someone getting this far in the process and still having their foot! All she ever gets to work with are amputees. I just smiled. In the end, she confirmed that lymph system has failed, probably damaged by the surgery, but with an intensive six week treatment program - it should be restarted.
So, I took everyone out to dinner to celebrate God's miracle and now I reek of garlic ..... hmmm, Greek food ....
A major shout out to God!
If you have been following along, you know what I have gone through to make it this far. Still a few more months of discomfort and pain but there is now light at the end of the tunnel - there is HOPE!
It is important to me that I share my victories and blessings and not just whine about life! Victory came most unexpectedly yesterday ...
I had a series of doctors' appointments yesterday, so Swede was coming down from Everett to drive me around. Only he never showed up and did not call either! Most unlike him! He is an engineer, if you looked up any aerospace engineer in a dictionary - his photo would be pasted there! Sometime it is just too funny the way in which he is so atypical, an engineer. I texted him and took off walking for the hospital where the first doctor, the infectious disease doctor is.
I also called his office to tell them I would be late since I was walking. It is only four blocks to the hospital but it still took 30 minutes due to the leg problems. But, I made it in record time - utterly exhausted. Everything is still good with the body, no signs of a re-infection. But, it seems that foot is now showing signs of a failure with the lymph system. Is there no end to this!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!!
I stopped off at the Physical Therapy place, which apparently does evaluations for lymph system disorders - I have no idea as to why. I was to learn that it is because there are so many women with breast cancer around here that they do this task and then treat in house. I get a packet of paper to fill out am told there is an evaluation appointment available in the afternoon and I am done with them!
By now it is lunchtime so I head off to my favorite Mexican place for lunch and text the still silent Swede that I am now walking there from the hospital, a distance of perhaps a half mile. He texts back that is already there. And I think ... "What the heck?". But as I walk along I am trying to remember back over 40 years ago and my medical training when I was in high school. I was a part of Rocky Mountain Search and Rescue back then, we were the para-medics of the day in Colorado. I had to admit there was little I could recall.
I make it about 100 yards from the door of the hospital when I see his little sports car turn on to the street I am walking down and roar past me, pull a U-Turn and then slide to a stop. I hop in and he is so apologetic! It seems he had written down 1:00 rather than 10:00 as my appointment time so he drove like a demon to get down to my little Burg and figured where ever I was, I would be doing Mexican food for lunch! LOL, I guess he knows me.
Over lunch, Swede and I chatted while I fill out reams of paperwork and ate. He had no ideas on the lymph system either and really wanted to talk about the new launch site Blue Origin is building in Florida ... perhaps he is thinking of coming out of retirement? Certainly, he is bored enough as witnessed by his driving down to see me weekly!
The bone doctor was next. New x-rays shot, one of his interns came in, yakked a bit and then left. About an hour later my surgeon comes in - I have not seen him since May when he was doing the titanium structure on me that failed a month later. I figured he was mad at me for destroying his fine work! But, he is happy, very happy, even jovial!
So the short of it:
- The fracture of the foot is solid
- The the bone structure of the foot is solid
- I passed a bone and muscle stress test
But, the titanium beam in the foot has failed and for now should be no problem. It just means my dream of being a ballerina will never happen now - sigh ... LOL!
He is happy because I am the exception. Only .5% of what I have gone through end up keeping any part of their leg, ankle or foot! And I get to keep all three! He even said that, "I had lost all hope for you because we started with a disaster, the attempts to save the foot and rebuild it failed, and yet - (he is waving the x-rays around now) - there is foot! Come back and see me in three weeks."
I was walking on air as I went to the physical therapy place. I was run through their tests as I told them about the year and its trauma. The person admitted she had never heard of someone getting this far in the process and still having their foot! All she ever gets to work with are amputees. I just smiled. In the end, she confirmed that lymph system has failed, probably damaged by the surgery, but with an intensive six week treatment program - it should be restarted.
So, I took everyone out to dinner to celebrate God's miracle and now I reek of garlic ..... hmmm, Greek food ....
A major shout out to God!
If you have been following along, you know what I have gone through to make it this far. Still a few more months of discomfort and pain but there is now light at the end of the tunnel - there is HOPE!
September 16, 2015
Whom God Is Not
First off, NO one has all of the answers, NO one knows everything about God, No one can tell you otherwise without lying ... and then you can know that they are not of God but of the adversary. Naturally, they will try to convince you of otherwise!
Mark 8:31-33
We Do Not Listen To God
God is constantly talking, we just do not listen because it contradicts what we want to believe.
Jesus spoke plainly of His coming death, but they could not grasp this.
We Start Rebuking God
Peter pulled an all-time belly flop by opening his mouth!
Peter saw the cross as defeat.
Jesus saw the cross as victory.
We Redefine God
Who was Jesus?
Who is God?
How can we know when we have found Him?
For the Jews:
Would kick the Romans out
Would regain Israel's glory through war
A physical king, a physical kingdom
For us:
When we say, "God would never _______"
We Attempt To Block God
The apostles attempted to manipulate Jesus.
We have to allow Jesus to use His methods, not ours, in accomplishing His goals.
Our goals are not Jesus' goal.
We can not see what God sees.
We can not see what God is doing today.
Hindsight is all we have!
So we reach a question ...
If God is not whom this generation/culture/pagan-christianity believes Him to be ...
Then what are you going to do once you can understand this?
End pragmatism in your dealings with God?
Begin the scarey walk in faith alone?
Pray and Praise and not demand of God?
Understand that God is GOD, He can and will do anything He desires to make His point - true enough, God will not violate His Word, but we throw a great deal into what He can and can not do and as I have learned - He is the ruler and you better jump or you will miss the train when He tells you what to do!
Changing this culture begins with you and you knowing whom God really is and is not ....
Mark 8:31-33
We Do Not Listen To God
God is constantly talking, we just do not listen because it contradicts what we want to believe.
Jesus spoke plainly of His coming death, but they could not grasp this.
We Start Rebuking God
Peter pulled an all-time belly flop by opening his mouth!
Peter saw the cross as defeat.
Jesus saw the cross as victory.
We Redefine God
Who was Jesus?
Who is God?
How can we know when we have found Him?
For the Jews:
Would kick the Romans out
Would regain Israel's glory through war
A physical king, a physical kingdom
For us:
When we say, "God would never _______"
We Attempt To Block God
The apostles attempted to manipulate Jesus.
We have to allow Jesus to use His methods, not ours, in accomplishing His goals.
Our goals are not Jesus' goal.
We can not see what God sees.
We can not see what God is doing today.
Hindsight is all we have!
So we reach a question ...
If God is not whom this generation/culture/pagan-christianity believes Him to be ...
Then what are you going to do once you can understand this?
End pragmatism in your dealings with God?
Begin the scarey walk in faith alone?
Pray and Praise and not demand of God?
Understand that God is GOD, He can and will do anything He desires to make His point - true enough, God will not violate His Word, but we throw a great deal into what He can and can not do and as I have learned - He is the ruler and you better jump or you will miss the train when He tells you what to do!
Changing this culture begins with you and you knowing whom God really is and is not ....
September 15, 2015
Random Shots - Too Small To Post
Still fighting with this strange fever: some days nothing, some weeks everyday at 3-5 degrees! Other days I can swing from -2.5 to +6 degrees from my normal - like a yo-yo! This is just plain weird! Just finished 5 straight days at 4 degrees above normal. I get to see the infectious disease guy this week - so maybe he can figure it out. I sure hope there is no more antibiotics in my future!
Then again, something in the back of my mind keeps reminding me there is some gland that regulates body temperature, if so - is that whacked now? Will have to research this when I am more awake.
*****
Last night I was thinking on movies and which ones do I think are my favorite these days?
Long ago, any one of the James Bond's would have merited favor, but no longer. Unless we are thinking of the intriguing character Daniel Craig plays ..... In the same vein, The Wildgeese, Das Boot, Die Schrechlieche Machen, Die Weisse Rosen. Seeing a theme there? Movies which have a bit of a dark worldview and innocence is corrupted.
Today ... the first movie after the beginning of the birthing of a new Kris was Hugo. It is still one of my new favorites. And the following step of creating a new Kris - a new movie even further removed from whom the old Kris was: The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (w/Stiller). Movies of light and hope and completeness where innocence is protected and not destroyed. I still cry during each of these even after numerous viewings. Movies after the final creation? There in lay a problem, nothing has had the same impact on me at those movies from 2 years ago.
*****
I was chugging around the local shopping super store and a woman actually flirted with me! Really? Far more guys flirt with me than women ... this is Seattle after all, sigh. So, it has been over a year since any female even tried to catch my eye. We crossed paths numerous times over the next hour and each time was the same. I was beginning to wonder if now I look like someone famous or something. I almost burst out laughing but did not - a very broken 60 year old man on a scooter buying Nyquil, consumed by fever, is hardly worth the effort of batting an eyelash at! At least in my mind. I realize the new svelt Kris, down 50 pounds and 8 inches off the waist is oh so terribly sexy - LOL. As I tell people, if I lose much more weight my abdominal muscles' protective layer of fat will be lost and they will be exposed! HORRORS! (My father would have been all over her like a duck on a slug in springtime!) But, then again, she was probably strung out on drugs - that would be closer my luck, if I had actually talked to her. So wise to refuse her offer to drag race her down the isles ... LOL
*****
Made it to church again Sunday, which is MAJOR effort physically. Again, those whom I had thought friends before the surgery - avoid me and only one offered to have lunch with me one day. But three women, none of whom I have ever thought friendly in the least, stopped by me separately as I was sipping tea in the fellowship hall and wanted to know ALL about the surgery. They all burst into tears ... and I am supposed to react how? Seriously, how do you comfort someone when you are in mind numbing pain? It continues to amaze me at how 40 years of friendships were erased with just this one traumatic event in my life. I hear more often from my Aunts in Switzerland or my nieces in Australia than I do friends whom live just blocks away. As for the three, they went their way promising to pray (and one cursing a church where such injuries are not even acknowledged for prayer by the congregation!)
*****
Yet today, I think I have a pretty powerful testimony about what I have gone through/how God has brought me through this, and no one is there whom would care to listen.
*****
One of the elderly women at church, whom uses a walker, got all tangled up in the women's toilet door. Her purse had fallen and was blocking one of the walker legs from going past the door frame. And the door has a strong spring which was pressing her walker sideways into the purse! So, I rescued her purse with my cane but then the cane became tangled with the purse strap, during which she lost control of the her walker which then went down, throwing her into me, and I am balancedd on my left leg only by now! No she was not a small woman, just elderly! Eventually I got us both untangled and her back in her walker! eeeeepah! And this at the exact moment half of the women's bladders where setting off sirens! I took more than one punch, kick and body slam into the door frame as they roared past me, pushing the old lady out of their way as well. People! It was time for the ugly German to come out but I was too exhausted and could barely stand by then.
*****
A husband and wife in the fellowship hall were reading about the adventures of Albert Arthur Plattner, my father, on their tablets. Always snooping around what people are doing on their tablets. :) We had a good time chatting about the holocaust, war, today's events, etc. I was saddened to be reminded again of what a wasted life he had lived. I still cling to the hope he would have considered God in his last hours. I told him all he needed to know in 2003 as I drove him back from Alaska. Eleven days of evangelism in a small cab of a pickup truck ... :) It was all I could for a complete stranger - even if he was my father - it had been 30 years since we had spent more than an hour together.
*****
The local restaurant has one waitress whom is quite personable and either has discernment or can read me like a book. It is embarrassing at how she knows just what question to ask when no one is in earshot. It could be anything from job, to life, to personal issues. And she hit the nail on the head yet again this past week. She offers encouragement and I have to remind myself that if an angel used an ass to talk to Balaam - God can certainly use her to reach out to me! So, I listen and I ponder. It is always odd, always right on ... but never to any conclusion. And that is the issue of my life at this time - there are no conclusions - just wreckage behind me and nothing appearing before me. Sigh ...
And today at lunch, again, I was overcome with sadness and yeah I was crying, quietly, no body movement at all, just quietly sipping soup. She walked by and quietly told me all was going to be well. Anyone witnessing that would have been utterly confused because her words had meaning to me but no one could have seen my tears.
*****
Managed to do a class on "building your palette", but the instructor was a no show, so I just painted little samples of blues and labelled them. Hey, if you are going to offer paints, I will use them! I did end up buying several tubes of paint I liked and a video on how to paint snow. Time to get ready for Christmas scenes!
*****
There were hardly any garage sales on the way home but I did find some old books on archaeology and a 1975 Amplified Bible. The 1975 was my first Bible and later editions had subtle wording changes after Zondervan was bought out by the Japanese. So, now I can check my memory against that edition and prove it one way or another! Gotta have something to do!
*****
And with that, I will call it a day ...
*****
Enjoy a scene from Walter Mitty that touched me:
Then again, something in the back of my mind keeps reminding me there is some gland that regulates body temperature, if so - is that whacked now? Will have to research this when I am more awake.
*****
Last night I was thinking on movies and which ones do I think are my favorite these days?
Long ago, any one of the James Bond's would have merited favor, but no longer. Unless we are thinking of the intriguing character Daniel Craig plays ..... In the same vein, The Wildgeese, Das Boot, Die Schrechlieche Machen, Die Weisse Rosen. Seeing a theme there? Movies which have a bit of a dark worldview and innocence is corrupted.
Today ... the first movie after the beginning of the birthing of a new Kris was Hugo. It is still one of my new favorites. And the following step of creating a new Kris - a new movie even further removed from whom the old Kris was: The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (w/Stiller). Movies of light and hope and completeness where innocence is protected and not destroyed. I still cry during each of these even after numerous viewings. Movies after the final creation? There in lay a problem, nothing has had the same impact on me at those movies from 2 years ago.
*****
I was chugging around the local shopping super store and a woman actually flirted with me! Really? Far more guys flirt with me than women ... this is Seattle after all, sigh. So, it has been over a year since any female even tried to catch my eye. We crossed paths numerous times over the next hour and each time was the same. I was beginning to wonder if now I look like someone famous or something. I almost burst out laughing but did not - a very broken 60 year old man on a scooter buying Nyquil, consumed by fever, is hardly worth the effort of batting an eyelash at! At least in my mind. I realize the new svelt Kris, down 50 pounds and 8 inches off the waist is oh so terribly sexy - LOL. As I tell people, if I lose much more weight my abdominal muscles' protective layer of fat will be lost and they will be exposed! HORRORS! (My father would have been all over her like a duck on a slug in springtime!) But, then again, she was probably strung out on drugs - that would be closer my luck, if I had actually talked to her. So wise to refuse her offer to drag race her down the isles ... LOL
*****
Made it to church again Sunday, which is MAJOR effort physically. Again, those whom I had thought friends before the surgery - avoid me and only one offered to have lunch with me one day. But three women, none of whom I have ever thought friendly in the least, stopped by me separately as I was sipping tea in the fellowship hall and wanted to know ALL about the surgery. They all burst into tears ... and I am supposed to react how? Seriously, how do you comfort someone when you are in mind numbing pain? It continues to amaze me at how 40 years of friendships were erased with just this one traumatic event in my life. I hear more often from my Aunts in Switzerland or my nieces in Australia than I do friends whom live just blocks away. As for the three, they went their way promising to pray (and one cursing a church where such injuries are not even acknowledged for prayer by the congregation!)
*****
Yet today, I think I have a pretty powerful testimony about what I have gone through/how God has brought me through this, and no one is there whom would care to listen.
*****
One of the elderly women at church, whom uses a walker, got all tangled up in the women's toilet door. Her purse had fallen and was blocking one of the walker legs from going past the door frame. And the door has a strong spring which was pressing her walker sideways into the purse! So, I rescued her purse with my cane but then the cane became tangled with the purse strap, during which she lost control of the her walker which then went down, throwing her into me, and I am balancedd on my left leg only by now! No she was not a small woman, just elderly! Eventually I got us both untangled and her back in her walker! eeeeepah! And this at the exact moment half of the women's bladders where setting off sirens! I took more than one punch, kick and body slam into the door frame as they roared past me, pushing the old lady out of their way as well. People! It was time for the ugly German to come out but I was too exhausted and could barely stand by then.
*****
A husband and wife in the fellowship hall were reading about the adventures of Albert Arthur Plattner, my father, on their tablets. Always snooping around what people are doing on their tablets. :) We had a good time chatting about the holocaust, war, today's events, etc. I was saddened to be reminded again of what a wasted life he had lived. I still cling to the hope he would have considered God in his last hours. I told him all he needed to know in 2003 as I drove him back from Alaska. Eleven days of evangelism in a small cab of a pickup truck ... :) It was all I could for a complete stranger - even if he was my father - it had been 30 years since we had spent more than an hour together.
*****
The local restaurant has one waitress whom is quite personable and either has discernment or can read me like a book. It is embarrassing at how she knows just what question to ask when no one is in earshot. It could be anything from job, to life, to personal issues. And she hit the nail on the head yet again this past week. She offers encouragement and I have to remind myself that if an angel used an ass to talk to Balaam - God can certainly use her to reach out to me! So, I listen and I ponder. It is always odd, always right on ... but never to any conclusion. And that is the issue of my life at this time - there are no conclusions - just wreckage behind me and nothing appearing before me. Sigh ...
And today at lunch, again, I was overcome with sadness and yeah I was crying, quietly, no body movement at all, just quietly sipping soup. She walked by and quietly told me all was going to be well. Anyone witnessing that would have been utterly confused because her words had meaning to me but no one could have seen my tears.
*****
Managed to do a class on "building your palette", but the instructor was a no show, so I just painted little samples of blues and labelled them. Hey, if you are going to offer paints, I will use them! I did end up buying several tubes of paint I liked and a video on how to paint snow. Time to get ready for Christmas scenes!
*****
There were hardly any garage sales on the way home but I did find some old books on archaeology and a 1975 Amplified Bible. The 1975 was my first Bible and later editions had subtle wording changes after Zondervan was bought out by the Japanese. So, now I can check my memory against that edition and prove it one way or another! Gotta have something to do!
*****
And with that, I will call it a day ...
*****
Enjoy a scene from Walter Mitty that touched me:
September 14, 2015
Hopelessness
This year has been hard. I try to put on a brave face but I died physically in July and finally in my spirit a weeks ago. I only had one reason to undergo the surgeries and all of the fallout from them - I had hope in a future I could cling to - if I survived ... But, it seems that was a hope in vain, for the last of my hope was stolen from me as well.
It is hard to struggle on, in constant pain, when you realize there is no longer any reason to go on. The brave face and the humor I hide behind should betray my struggle but no one it seems ever really knew me. Just a clown, to have demands made of him for which he has no ability, no energy, nor desire for life left to rise up to meet. No one helps, no one comforts, no one is even near 99% of the time. And so very much alone day after day after day, ad nauseam is very wearing.
James' memory plagues me. He chose the easy way out - I still think it was wrong of him to end his life as he did. Sure family is covered by lots of life insurance but he damaged his wife and teenage daughter badly, scars which will last a lifetime. I see his wife off and on, a random message on Facebook, there are no words which can be said by me. I am a visible reminder of James to her, and his struggles. Sometimes, late at night, I wonder ... didn't he actually choose wisely, given the situation? He could have done the surgeries, suffered through the inevitable problems as I am. He had youth on his side, heck he probably would be out of physical therapy by now, rather than struggling with death.
I am not considering suicide, I have no interest in calling God's bluff. But, conversely, James is with God, at peace, where I long to be ... To be made perfect, to know no pain anymore, to bask in the Glory of God. To visit with those whom intrigue me (David, John, Jonah, Esarhaddon - did he make it? ...). All this James has. And yet ...
What is the value of life? Yes, to bring God glory. Is there glory in my suffering? I doubt it. God surely does not sit up there and say, "Hey, James, check out Kris down there taking a beating reserved for just a select few!" or, "Hey, James, that could be you! Don't know what you gave up there lad!"
And yet, it is in the nature of man to grasp on to hope, even in the face of hopelessness, that it will get better, that we do not suffer in vain, that there could even be a Job sort of blessing on the other side! Then again, there might not be anything other than hope, the eternal one I mentioned earlier - healing, peace and to be comforted. Maybe whatever I will be a year from now, required this path to be followed - and I have NO vision or idea of whom that person is or will be! I currently do not even understand how this in anyway serves God. (But, it sure is making a mess out of me!)
So, as I end this post, I think back on Romans, chapter 5:
It is hard to struggle on, in constant pain, when you realize there is no longer any reason to go on. The brave face and the humor I hide behind should betray my struggle but no one it seems ever really knew me. Just a clown, to have demands made of him for which he has no ability, no energy, nor desire for life left to rise up to meet. No one helps, no one comforts, no one is even near 99% of the time. And so very much alone day after day after day, ad nauseam is very wearing.
James' memory plagues me. He chose the easy way out - I still think it was wrong of him to end his life as he did. Sure family is covered by lots of life insurance but he damaged his wife and teenage daughter badly, scars which will last a lifetime. I see his wife off and on, a random message on Facebook, there are no words which can be said by me. I am a visible reminder of James to her, and his struggles. Sometimes, late at night, I wonder ... didn't he actually choose wisely, given the situation? He could have done the surgeries, suffered through the inevitable problems as I am. He had youth on his side, heck he probably would be out of physical therapy by now, rather than struggling with death.
I am not considering suicide, I have no interest in calling God's bluff. But, conversely, James is with God, at peace, where I long to be ... To be made perfect, to know no pain anymore, to bask in the Glory of God. To visit with those whom intrigue me (David, John, Jonah, Esarhaddon - did he make it? ...). All this James has. And yet ...
What is the value of life? Yes, to bring God glory. Is there glory in my suffering? I doubt it. God surely does not sit up there and say, "Hey, James, check out Kris down there taking a beating reserved for just a select few!" or, "Hey, James, that could be you! Don't know what you gave up there lad!"
And yet, it is in the nature of man to grasp on to hope, even in the face of hopelessness, that it will get better, that we do not suffer in vain, that there could even be a Job sort of blessing on the other side! Then again, there might not be anything other than hope, the eternal one I mentioned earlier - healing, peace and to be comforted. Maybe whatever I will be a year from now, required this path to be followed - and I have NO vision or idea of whom that person is or will be! I currently do not even understand how this in anyway serves God. (But, it sure is making a mess out of me!)
So, as I end this post, I think back on Romans, chapter 5:
- 3 Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance;
- 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope.
- 5 And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.
September 12, 2015
Musical Saturday Morning
I failed to post a 1980's video last weekend, just so close to death....
So, here is a little Queen on the subject of death, 1986 - the beginning of the end for Freddie Mercury, if you listen close you can hear and see something is "off":
And it seems only 5 years later, the brave face and fight he put up would be over. I really liked Freddie - consummate showman and an incredible talent. Yeah, a lot of breakage came with that but his was probably one of the bigger losses to the entertainment world.
His niece/cousin/whatever she is has been a friend of mine for decades, so I followed the decline and encouraged her to change the path she was on - just as self destructive. But, alas, no one ever listens to Kris.
I tried to find a video of his last singing performance, it has been taken down. A BBC recording of him standing by a piano, unable to support himself - but that voice! That incredible voice, which even he was able to draw strength from. So, a montage of clips of Freddie, including my cousin as well.
So, cousin Anne appears numerous times, enough so that rumors circulated at the time that she was inflicted as he had been. Many years later, she did get quite ill and almost died - but she assured me it was lymphoma. Yeah, well, if lies were best wishes I guess. And maybe she did listen to Kris, just a little bit years ago as she is moving in more traditional spiritual realms it seems. :)
So, here is a little Queen on the subject of death, 1986 - the beginning of the end for Freddie Mercury, if you listen close you can hear and see something is "off":
And it seems only 5 years later, the brave face and fight he put up would be over. I really liked Freddie - consummate showman and an incredible talent. Yeah, a lot of breakage came with that but his was probably one of the bigger losses to the entertainment world.
His niece/cousin/whatever she is has been a friend of mine for decades, so I followed the decline and encouraged her to change the path she was on - just as self destructive. But, alas, no one ever listens to Kris.
I tried to find a video of his last singing performance, it has been taken down. A BBC recording of him standing by a piano, unable to support himself - but that voice! That incredible voice, which even he was able to draw strength from. So, a montage of clips of Freddie, including my cousin as well.
So, cousin Anne appears numerous times, enough so that rumors circulated at the time that she was inflicted as he had been. Many years later, she did get quite ill and almost died - but she assured me it was lymphoma. Yeah, well, if lies were best wishes I guess. And maybe she did listen to Kris, just a little bit years ago as she is moving in more traditional spiritual realms it seems. :)
September 11, 2015
It Is All About The Heart
As I have struggled through the past two months, I have pondered the utter destruction of Kris in June and all of those questions this brings up that I do not even possess the ability to form words around. Kris is been broken, but what broke and why, however am I to begin repairs or even know how to pray?!?!?!?!?
Then it hit me this morning, it all revolves around the heart ... something I never possessed but must now make allowance for. So me and God have been having some long talks since last Thursday, for even as new as my heart is He gave me, it was broken too.
A renewed heart is what I am pondering: what is it, how is it renewed, how can I possess and protect it?
A Renewed Heart is:
awed by the Word of God - Psalms 119:161
broken - Psalms 34:18, 51:17
circumcised - Deuteronomy 30:6, Romans 2:29
clean - Psalms 73:1
confident in God - Psalms 112:7
desirous of God - Psalms 84:2
devoted to God - Psalms 9:1, 199:10/69/145
enlarged - Psalms 119:32, II Corinthians 6:11
faithful to God - Nehemiah 9:8
filled with the fear of God - Jeremiah 32:40
filled with the law of God - Psalms 40:8, 119:11
fixed on God - Psalms 57:7, 112:7
honest and good - Luke 8:15
inclined to obedience - Psalms 119:112
joyful in God - 1 Samuel 2:1, Zechariah 10:7
meditative - Psalms 4:4, 77:6
obedient - Psalms 119:112, Romans 6:17
perfect with God - 1 Kings 8:61, Psalms 101:2
prayerful - 1 Samuel 1:13, Psalms 27:8
pure - Psalms 24:4, Matthew 5:8
seeks God - 2 Chronicles 19:3, Ezra 7:10, Psalms 10:17
sincere - Acts 2:46, Hebrews 10:22
sympathizing - Jeremiah 4:19, Lamentations 3:51
tender - 1 Samuel 24:5, II Kings 22:19
treasury of good - Matthew 12:35
upright - Psalms 97:11, 125:4
void of fear - Psalms 27:3
wise - Proverbs 10:8, 14:33, 23:15
zealous - II Chronicles 17:6, Jeremiah 20:9
(I hope I transcribed my list of verses correctly! I swear my eyes were crossing after line 3!)
So, I look at this list of what I have designated a renewed heart - the goal for this gift God gave me - and the new creation of, as I am rebuilt. I see in the list I could have easily checked them off under my old nature but much of that would have been legalism, which is not the intent of God. God's intent is not that we have to justify anything - face it we can't, He already knows the score internally on both of us! You have to decide where you stand and make corrections, just like me.
I see this list as the list of: in humility, can I see in myself - without explanation - these attributes?
Am I awed by the Word of God? If not, then I have a problem.
All the way through, Am I zealous in my heart for God? If not, again a problem to correct.
If this list is what God expects of me and this heart, then this is what must become my goal. Most I do not really see as a problem, the good carry over from whom I was before, but some perplex me, like zealous. I have no clue what the context is much less what it looks like or creates that. And truthfully, I am not so sure I have ever been exactly zealous successfully over anything.
Yeah, some interesting growth challenges for me to muddle through.
Perhaps for you too ...
Then it hit me this morning, it all revolves around the heart ... something I never possessed but must now make allowance for. So me and God have been having some long talks since last Thursday, for even as new as my heart is He gave me, it was broken too.
A renewed heart is what I am pondering: what is it, how is it renewed, how can I possess and protect it?
A Renewed Heart is:
awed by the Word of God - Psalms 119:161
broken - Psalms 34:18, 51:17
circumcised - Deuteronomy 30:6, Romans 2:29
clean - Psalms 73:1
confident in God - Psalms 112:7
desirous of God - Psalms 84:2
devoted to God - Psalms 9:1, 199:10/69/145
enlarged - Psalms 119:32, II Corinthians 6:11
faithful to God - Nehemiah 9:8
filled with the fear of God - Jeremiah 32:40
filled with the law of God - Psalms 40:8, 119:11
fixed on God - Psalms 57:7, 112:7
honest and good - Luke 8:15
inclined to obedience - Psalms 119:112
joyful in God - 1 Samuel 2:1, Zechariah 10:7
meditative - Psalms 4:4, 77:6
obedient - Psalms 119:112, Romans 6:17
perfect with God - 1 Kings 8:61, Psalms 101:2
prayerful - 1 Samuel 1:13, Psalms 27:8
pure - Psalms 24:4, Matthew 5:8
seeks God - 2 Chronicles 19:3, Ezra 7:10, Psalms 10:17
sincere - Acts 2:46, Hebrews 10:22
sympathizing - Jeremiah 4:19, Lamentations 3:51
tender - 1 Samuel 24:5, II Kings 22:19
treasury of good - Matthew 12:35
upright - Psalms 97:11, 125:4
void of fear - Psalms 27:3
wise - Proverbs 10:8, 14:33, 23:15
zealous - II Chronicles 17:6, Jeremiah 20:9
(I hope I transcribed my list of verses correctly! I swear my eyes were crossing after line 3!)
So, I look at this list of what I have designated a renewed heart - the goal for this gift God gave me - and the new creation of, as I am rebuilt. I see in the list I could have easily checked them off under my old nature but much of that would have been legalism, which is not the intent of God. God's intent is not that we have to justify anything - face it we can't, He already knows the score internally on both of us! You have to decide where you stand and make corrections, just like me.
I see this list as the list of: in humility, can I see in myself - without explanation - these attributes?
Am I awed by the Word of God? If not, then I have a problem.
All the way through, Am I zealous in my heart for God? If not, again a problem to correct.
If this list is what God expects of me and this heart, then this is what must become my goal. Most I do not really see as a problem, the good carry over from whom I was before, but some perplex me, like zealous. I have no clue what the context is much less what it looks like or creates that. And truthfully, I am not so sure I have ever been exactly zealous successfully over anything.
Yeah, some interesting growth challenges for me to muddle through.
Perhaps for you too ...
September 10, 2015
NARF!
Friday night, I was at a physical end, nothing left, so I was watching several hours of Pinky and the Brain. It was great and many laughs. Youngest Daughter stormed out of the room after asking, "Really?!!!!!!!!!!"
Saturday, I was out shopping all day long visiting junk shops around the area and picking up stuff that interests me.
So, I walk into one store and I was whistling the theme song to Pinky and Brain. All of these people stopped and looked at me like I was an idiot. I looked back at them and said, "NARF!", very loudly.
The sales clerk looked at me and just cracked up and we both laughed heartily! Then the other customers looked at each other with wonderment, what did this mean, was the unspoken question! "NARF", the untranslatable expression of Pinky to any form of mental challenge!
It was so funny!
But, I ran into my knife making youth from church. We visited for hours!
Saw some new Swiss Made hand chisels of half size, which will come in handy this winter.
I picked up a new painting book, ideas for winter scenes and some good quality paper.
Visited a metal detecting store and found some good books on ghost towns and mining camps.
Two stores down is a gun shop where I drooled all over a Remington 81 in .35 Remington. :)
Took home an antique rifle case, perhaps 60 years old and in good condition.
Met a nice German Shepard. I like real dogs.
Helped save a man having a heart attack (maybe only 30 years old?!?!?!?).
Had a horrible lunch.
Helped an elderly lady whom was intent on falling off of a balcony. Luckily she was not heavy!
And had popcorn and water with my movie - no reaction this time. hmmm!
Dinner with number one daughter, number three had other plans.
Just a plain good day.
Did not manage to take over the world though .... so maybe I am insane!
NARF!
Saturday, I was out shopping all day long visiting junk shops around the area and picking up stuff that interests me.
So, I walk into one store and I was whistling the theme song to Pinky and Brain. All of these people stopped and looked at me like I was an idiot. I looked back at them and said, "NARF!", very loudly.
The sales clerk looked at me and just cracked up and we both laughed heartily! Then the other customers looked at each other with wonderment, what did this mean, was the unspoken question! "NARF", the untranslatable expression of Pinky to any form of mental challenge!
It was so funny!
But, I ran into my knife making youth from church. We visited for hours!
Saw some new Swiss Made hand chisels of half size, which will come in handy this winter.
I picked up a new painting book, ideas for winter scenes and some good quality paper.
Visited a metal detecting store and found some good books on ghost towns and mining camps.
Two stores down is a gun shop where I drooled all over a Remington 81 in .35 Remington. :)
Took home an antique rifle case, perhaps 60 years old and in good condition.
Met a nice German Shepard. I like real dogs.
Helped save a man having a heart attack (maybe only 30 years old?!?!?!?).
Had a horrible lunch.
Helped an elderly lady whom was intent on falling off of a balcony. Luckily she was not heavy!
And had popcorn and water with my movie - no reaction this time. hmmm!
Dinner with number one daughter, number three had other plans.
Just a plain good day.
Did not manage to take over the world though .... so maybe I am insane!
NARF!
September 9, 2015
Hitman - Agent 47
So, a sociopath walks into a movie, to see a movie, about a sociopath, killing other sociopaths.
Why does this sound like a bad joke?
Oh, I know, because it is another Hitman movie!
Due to the personal disasters of my life last week, I was back into full socio mode by Saturday. Not a good thing for me or anyone else, but something had to be done if Kris was going to survive. And he may not, health is still up in the air and I find myself back in 1976 in all aspects of my life - again! Plus the added advantage of being captive to those whom truly do not even like me!
Restart life. Now how to get a job?!?!?!?!
The movie takes place in Berlin (and Singapore), where no one seems able to speak German, even simple words like left and right as directions are beyond the actors' ability ... sigh. Again, a little research and they could have had a better movie. But, be that as it is, they made an interesting flick. And is it is always good to see pieces of my homeland.
Lots of shoot'em up, bang'em up action and adventure - the perfect movie for the teenage male. Plus, no nudity for a change in a movie! A bare female back only in a swimming scene.
Again, a female whom is actually the daughter of a hunted scientist, everyone wants to use her to get to her father so he can create more "agents". Only the agents are less interested in having more people broken like them and inflicted upon humanity.
Didn't I just see this same story in Man From U.N.C.L.E.? Except Hitman might be the better of the two!
A very "C" grade movie, probably an owner. Entertaining in a mindless, impossible situational way.
I was very glad no one was in the theater as I was laughing uncontrollably throughout the movie! The situations were so implausible you had to laugh! Laws of physics violated constantly, impossible reactions, ARGH! I laughed, and laughed and laughed. Now if only Tom Cruz had been in it, this would have been the perfect "D" grade film!
I would file this one under comedy except a normal person would rank it as action adventure ... But, then we both know, I am far from normal.
Why does this sound like a bad joke?
Oh, I know, because it is another Hitman movie!
Due to the personal disasters of my life last week, I was back into full socio mode by Saturday. Not a good thing for me or anyone else, but something had to be done if Kris was going to survive. And he may not, health is still up in the air and I find myself back in 1976 in all aspects of my life - again! Plus the added advantage of being captive to those whom truly do not even like me!
Restart life. Now how to get a job?!?!?!?!
The movie takes place in Berlin (and Singapore), where no one seems able to speak German, even simple words like left and right as directions are beyond the actors' ability ... sigh. Again, a little research and they could have had a better movie. But, be that as it is, they made an interesting flick. And is it is always good to see pieces of my homeland.
Lots of shoot'em up, bang'em up action and adventure - the perfect movie for the teenage male. Plus, no nudity for a change in a movie! A bare female back only in a swimming scene.
Again, a female whom is actually the daughter of a hunted scientist, everyone wants to use her to get to her father so he can create more "agents". Only the agents are less interested in having more people broken like them and inflicted upon humanity.
Didn't I just see this same story in Man From U.N.C.L.E.? Except Hitman might be the better of the two!
A very "C" grade movie, probably an owner. Entertaining in a mindless, impossible situational way.
I was very glad no one was in the theater as I was laughing uncontrollably throughout the movie! The situations were so implausible you had to laugh! Laws of physics violated constantly, impossible reactions, ARGH! I laughed, and laughed and laughed. Now if only Tom Cruz had been in it, this would have been the perfect "D" grade film!
I would file this one under comedy except a normal person would rank it as action adventure ... But, then we both know, I am far from normal.
September 8, 2015
Terminator - Again!
Swede bombed down and said, "Let's do a movie!"
A quick check on the internet showed that the dollar theater had Terminator showing, neither of us had seen it - so we rushed off.
Picked up some hot dogs at the counter, a bottled water and a tub of popcorn. So we both were eating exactly the same stuff.
About twenty minutes in, I had to make a toilet run.
Twenty minutes later, again, only this one lasted until 2.5 hours after the movie finished!
Gees!
Poor Swede.
And I may need to stay away from that theater for a year or so ... it was ghastly!
I have no doubts that my surveillance camera photo is now on the counter of the ticket booth!
"Do not sell, do not approach, ask for three rolls of Charmin as replacement for what he did ..."
Worse food allergy of my life! The only thing that hits me that hard and fast is SPLENDA, but I had nothing which should have had any sweetener in it. So a bit of a mystery to me. Back home, well it was Imodium time and the daze it leaves me for days.
Obviously, I missed huge amounts of the movie but it had some good and bad.
Graphics were great!
The story is of an alternate time line created by the future machines.
Sarah Conner must still die!
John Conner, well, did not see that one coming!
It was a reasonable retelling of the original story, with just enough new stuff to make it interesting. I was literally on the edge of my seat at one point because I was simply fascinated by what they had done! Wow! Kris is never on the edge of his seat. Last time was in Sherlock Holmes II with Robert Downey, when I saw my old project's software being used to allow a London background scene fly through! Still WOW'ed by that!
Acting wise, Arnold is Arnold, the new Reese and Sarah are not as convincing as the originals. John Conner however, did rather well.
It is going to be a trilogy apparently, so expect two more Arnold's to pop up and carry the story somewhere ...
Yes, I will be seeing this again, after I buy it.
Just remember, Genisys is Skynet ...
A quick check on the internet showed that the dollar theater had Terminator showing, neither of us had seen it - so we rushed off.
Picked up some hot dogs at the counter, a bottled water and a tub of popcorn. So we both were eating exactly the same stuff.
About twenty minutes in, I had to make a toilet run.
Twenty minutes later, again, only this one lasted until 2.5 hours after the movie finished!
Gees!
Poor Swede.
And I may need to stay away from that theater for a year or so ... it was ghastly!
I have no doubts that my surveillance camera photo is now on the counter of the ticket booth!
"Do not sell, do not approach, ask for three rolls of Charmin as replacement for what he did ..."
Worse food allergy of my life! The only thing that hits me that hard and fast is SPLENDA, but I had nothing which should have had any sweetener in it. So a bit of a mystery to me. Back home, well it was Imodium time and the daze it leaves me for days.
Obviously, I missed huge amounts of the movie but it had some good and bad.
Graphics were great!
The story is of an alternate time line created by the future machines.
Sarah Conner must still die!
John Conner, well, did not see that one coming!
It was a reasonable retelling of the original story, with just enough new stuff to make it interesting. I was literally on the edge of my seat at one point because I was simply fascinated by what they had done! Wow! Kris is never on the edge of his seat. Last time was in Sherlock Holmes II with Robert Downey, when I saw my old project's software being used to allow a London background scene fly through! Still WOW'ed by that!
Acting wise, Arnold is Arnold, the new Reese and Sarah are not as convincing as the originals. John Conner however, did rather well.
It is going to be a trilogy apparently, so expect two more Arnold's to pop up and carry the story somewhere ...
Yes, I will be seeing this again, after I buy it.
Just remember, Genisys is Skynet ...
September 7, 2015
Can You See?
When we can not see "right", we have a real problem!
We are all blind and need to have our eyes opened over and over again.
Physical or understanding, God reveals and heals as He chooses.
Mark 8:22-26
Expect Everyone's Story To Be Different
Jesus interacts with each of us differently
Some He touched once and they were healed.
Some He touched multiple times to be healed.
Some He spoke to.
Some He commanded.
Each approach ended in a healing.
God is not working the same in you, as in me!
Tell Jesus The Truth
The blind man had to say he was not healed.
Then Jesus continued the process.
Yeah, He knows, but wants us to interact with Him.
Have Patience In The Process
We all need help.
We all need healing.
Some of us just have to take the painful route, others not so much.
We must have patience with one another!
Some will be children in the Faith far longer than others.
And we do not need to understand.
Take Advantage of What Is Given
The blind man could see and so did.
Life, salvation, healing in some matter - all God can give, all we can benefit from.
For some it comes slower, it is not your life, God is in charge!
Stay Out To Stay Better
Why did Jesus not want the man to go to the village?
Because the town had no belief, even though they had seen Jesus' miracles and chose not to believe.
They were condemned.
This miracle would just be one more nail in their coffin!
We are all blind and need to have our eyes opened over and over again.
Physical or understanding, God reveals and heals as He chooses.
Mark 8:22-26
Expect Everyone's Story To Be Different
Jesus interacts with each of us differently
Some He touched once and they were healed.
Some He touched multiple times to be healed.
Some He spoke to.
Some He commanded.
Each approach ended in a healing.
God is not working the same in you, as in me!
Tell Jesus The Truth
The blind man had to say he was not healed.
Then Jesus continued the process.
Yeah, He knows, but wants us to interact with Him.
Have Patience In The Process
We all need help.
We all need healing.
Some of us just have to take the painful route, others not so much.
We must have patience with one another!
Some will be children in the Faith far longer than others.
And we do not need to understand.
Take Advantage of What Is Given
The blind man could see and so did.
Life, salvation, healing in some matter - all God can give, all we can benefit from.
For some it comes slower, it is not your life, God is in charge!
Stay Out To Stay Better
Why did Jesus not want the man to go to the village?
Because the town had no belief, even though they had seen Jesus' miracles and chose not to believe.
They were condemned.
This miracle would just be one more nail in their coffin!
September 5, 2015
Musical Saturday Morning
Another of those songs so commonly played on the Kaiserslautern Army radio as we were bussed to Canadian schools for class each day ... None of us had much of a clue what the song was about - an innocent time when maybe seniors in high school worried about such things.
Of course, today the words would be changed to "Friended". "I love you but let's just be friends ..." I just find it humorous how culture uses "love" as if it has an on/off switch. Real love is I fear eternal. We substitute "passion" for love believing they are the same. The are not, begin with passion and you will never find love. Begin with love and you will find passion as a component of the relationship. It is just how we are designed. I dare say a high percentage of divorces today are because love was never understood and only passion was acted upon. Instead, we have "love" and "true love" or correctly: passion and love.
Sadly, I see this misunderstanding in a few of my children as well. No one listens to the stupid old man - "you are so outdated! that is not how it works at all." And so, breakup after breakup, for some of them. Pain and tears which never needed to be shed. Hearts hardened. Pending divorce. Tragic.
Where does love come from? God.
If you do not have God in your life (AND they in their life) you will never ever find love together.
Real love.
True love.
And when you stumble across it, it is the most beautiful of things.
God taught me quite the lesson once, using me, to show unconditional love for another and I am just watching myself in this scene and going ... "uhmmmmmmmm, this sure is not me!" And I saw there was a huge amount of freedom to be found in unconditional love - His love, we are supposed to be able to model this. But, mankind seems to like strings attached to everything!'
Auch!, whatever .....
In my culture I grew up in, a kiss was the engagement offering.
An acceptance was her kissing you back.
At this point in time - for all intents and purposes, you were married.
And yes to separate did require a formal divorce proceeding!
So, you kissed once and wisely ...
Of course, today the words would be changed to "Friended". "I love you but let's just be friends ..." I just find it humorous how culture uses "love" as if it has an on/off switch. Real love is I fear eternal. We substitute "passion" for love believing they are the same. The are not, begin with passion and you will never find love. Begin with love and you will find passion as a component of the relationship. It is just how we are designed. I dare say a high percentage of divorces today are because love was never understood and only passion was acted upon. Instead, we have "love" and "true love" or correctly: passion and love.
Sadly, I see this misunderstanding in a few of my children as well. No one listens to the stupid old man - "you are so outdated! that is not how it works at all." And so, breakup after breakup, for some of them. Pain and tears which never needed to be shed. Hearts hardened. Pending divorce. Tragic.
Where does love come from? God.
If you do not have God in your life (AND they in their life) you will never ever find love together.
Real love.
True love.
And when you stumble across it, it is the most beautiful of things.
God taught me quite the lesson once, using me, to show unconditional love for another and I am just watching myself in this scene and going ... "uhmmmmmmmm, this sure is not me!" And I saw there was a huge amount of freedom to be found in unconditional love - His love, we are supposed to be able to model this. But, mankind seems to like strings attached to everything!'
Auch!, whatever .....
In my culture I grew up in, a kiss was the engagement offering.
An acceptance was her kissing you back.
At this point in time - for all intents and purposes, you were married.
And yes to separate did require a formal divorce proceeding!
So, you kissed once and wisely ...
September 4, 2015
Getting The Boot
Back in June, my surgeon had me apply for a "Crow Walker", whatever the heck that is! It is supposed to help the foot heal and build bone density.
But, June was a very bad month, July even worse, August beyond reality. Mostly spent in the hospital, escaping just long enough for my body to fail more and end up back in that NAZI nursing hell ....
So, unable to even be fitted for new footwear, it did not seem like much of a problem.
But, the day did come when I could go in for a cast to be made of my leg and sent off to have this enigma of footwear created. Got my fitting appointment date and back home to wait.
But, UPS lost my new boot! I spent almost an entire day sitting in the lobby because UPS was sure they could find it before the business closed. Okay, make a new appointment, so a new one can be delivered.
Week two, confirmation that UPS is coming with the boot, so back into the clinic to wait - and wait - and wait - and wait. By the end of the day, no boot, just another appointment scheduled ...
Week three, I brought plenty of reading material, I had already read all of their magazines on the prior visits! But, I had barely sat down when I was called back into a fitting room.
There, I was presented with a boot which would have terrified Frankenstein's monster! OMG! As if my foot is not huge enough, no let us accent that issue with a monster sized boot! Were it red, I would be looking for a red nose to wear on Halloween! Maybe a horn to honk as well.
It took the entire morning to get that boot fitted to the foot. Sigh. Four hours ... But, I was happy to find that it was easier to drive with the boot than the walking cast. But, walking, well, it is a problem. There is no flex in the ankle area, so each step you make, "THUNK!" and your whole body is jerked sideways!
So, four months sentenced to thunk around with each and every step. Guess that job at the art store will now be waiting for sometime next year - this boot will not make for a positive image ... sigh ...
Life on hold, still ...
But, June was a very bad month, July even worse, August beyond reality. Mostly spent in the hospital, escaping just long enough for my body to fail more and end up back in that NAZI nursing hell ....
So, unable to even be fitted for new footwear, it did not seem like much of a problem.
But, the day did come when I could go in for a cast to be made of my leg and sent off to have this enigma of footwear created. Got my fitting appointment date and back home to wait.
But, UPS lost my new boot! I spent almost an entire day sitting in the lobby because UPS was sure they could find it before the business closed. Okay, make a new appointment, so a new one can be delivered.
Week two, confirmation that UPS is coming with the boot, so back into the clinic to wait - and wait - and wait - and wait. By the end of the day, no boot, just another appointment scheduled ...
Week three, I brought plenty of reading material, I had already read all of their magazines on the prior visits! But, I had barely sat down when I was called back into a fitting room.
There, I was presented with a boot which would have terrified Frankenstein's monster! OMG! As if my foot is not huge enough, no let us accent that issue with a monster sized boot! Were it red, I would be looking for a red nose to wear on Halloween! Maybe a horn to honk as well.
It took the entire morning to get that boot fitted to the foot. Sigh. Four hours ... But, I was happy to find that it was easier to drive with the boot than the walking cast. But, walking, well, it is a problem. There is no flex in the ankle area, so each step you make, "THUNK!" and your whole body is jerked sideways!
So, four months sentenced to thunk around with each and every step. Guess that job at the art store will now be waiting for sometime next year - this boot will not make for a positive image ... sigh ...
Life on hold, still ...
September 3, 2015
Aliens Are Stealing My Socks
Oh dear! This is worse than I thought! Last minute changes to correct this to the current state!
I have lots of pairs of socks and they are ALL exactly the same: mid-calf, white, grey bottomed gym socks. So, you would think that sock matching would be no real problem. Well, were it not for random visits by sock stealing Aliens!
I actively check my socks for tears, holes or wear, but I am pretty easy on my clothes. So torn - go to the trash, holes - go to the trash, abrasions - go to the trash. Easy! It almost never happens until lately.
So, I put my socks in the washing machine and I get back holey, torn and abraded socks ... how is that even possible? This does not happen to my tee shirts or underwear!
I bought some new super soft socks for my bad foot on Friday. Tossed them into the washer with some tee shirts and of six pair tossed in - only one sock came back out! The missing 11 socks are not in the washer, not in the dryer, not on the floor, stuck on the tee shirts, nor in the tee shirts either! Mystery fills the air! How is this possible in a logical world? It just can't be. Youngest Daughter swears she knows nothing about this!
So, we must be looking at something illogical, something therefore either a part of the spiritual world or something else.
Were those sock made out of spun sugar and dissolved in the warm waters?
Nah!
Sasquatch needing new socks after hiking all this way from the Okanogan forest fires?
Maybe.
Could it be the North Carolina Lizard Man on a tour of the northwest?
Nah!
Ghosts of javalinas past, hunted and dined on in my dreams?
Hmmmmmm :)
No, something more logical, more towards reality: Aliens.
Of course!
UFO's have been long a part of local lore. The first sighting of a UFO in modern times (outside of Foo Fighters during WWII) was only a mile to the west of my washing machine. We have an annual UFO celebration even! Yes, it is either Aliens or Men in Black sneaking around my washing machine and stealing my nice warm new socks from the dryer!
There can be no other explanation I can think of!
I might leave some ex-lax brownies out, next to my replacement socks tomorrow ... we will just see whom is responsible for this! :)
Could be a long ride back to Saturn .......
I have lots of pairs of socks and they are ALL exactly the same: mid-calf, white, grey bottomed gym socks. So, you would think that sock matching would be no real problem. Well, were it not for random visits by sock stealing Aliens!
I actively check my socks for tears, holes or wear, but I am pretty easy on my clothes. So torn - go to the trash, holes - go to the trash, abrasions - go to the trash. Easy! It almost never happens until lately.
So, I put my socks in the washing machine and I get back holey, torn and abraded socks ... how is that even possible? This does not happen to my tee shirts or underwear!
I bought some new super soft socks for my bad foot on Friday. Tossed them into the washer with some tee shirts and of six pair tossed in - only one sock came back out! The missing 11 socks are not in the washer, not in the dryer, not on the floor, stuck on the tee shirts, nor in the tee shirts either! Mystery fills the air! How is this possible in a logical world? It just can't be. Youngest Daughter swears she knows nothing about this!
So, we must be looking at something illogical, something therefore either a part of the spiritual world or something else.
Were those sock made out of spun sugar and dissolved in the warm waters?
Nah!
Sasquatch needing new socks after hiking all this way from the Okanogan forest fires?
Maybe.
Could it be the North Carolina Lizard Man on a tour of the northwest?
Nah!
Ghosts of javalinas past, hunted and dined on in my dreams?
Hmmmmmm :)
No, something more logical, more towards reality: Aliens.
Of course!
UFO's have been long a part of local lore. The first sighting of a UFO in modern times (outside of Foo Fighters during WWII) was only a mile to the west of my washing machine. We have an annual UFO celebration even! Yes, it is either Aliens or Men in Black sneaking around my washing machine and stealing my nice warm new socks from the dryer!
There can be no other explanation I can think of!
I might leave some ex-lax brownies out, next to my replacement socks tomorrow ... we will just see whom is responsible for this! :)
Could be a long ride back to Saturn .......
September 2, 2015
Man From U.N.C.L.E.
After weeks of trying to get together with Swedish Rocket Scientist, to go see this movie, I gave up. Last week, Swede, decided to go camping up in the San Juan Islands. I was finally cleared to drive a car short distances - so, I decided to finally go see it by myself! The theater is only 6 miles away.
And I have to admit with all of my walls down, running on new nature alone - it was an interesting adventure. No, I no longer like seeing movies by myself. And, in all it was an unsatisfying adventure because of that.
The movie was a bit weird. Napoleon is a sociopath? lllya is a psychopath? That is a new take there. Most of the movie seems have the two of them planning on how to the kill the other or at least get one upsmanship over each other. Add a young supposed East German female auto mechanic and you have some odd pairings.
The story revolves around Edvard Teller (Edward to the yanks), a nuclear scientist whom has gone missing and the father of the girl.
Okay, here reality gets strained horribly. Teller was one of my "uncles", him and father were best friends. He ran the Lawrence Livermore Labs, where father did much of his work on the hydrogen beast. It has been so long ago, I had even forgotten what he actually looked like! So, since the movie brought it up, I went on to the internet image files to see if I could spot him in the photos which would pop up.
Oh yeah, that also triggered a new memory as well.
As then I was to be reminded of Szilard, whose name I had long forgotten but whose bizarre antics and sense of humor helped to mold me in those early days. When I saw the scientists' images, memories came rushing back ... Of that group of scientists, it was Szilard whom I had the strongest memories of - he was one warped dude. The strangest of things fascinated him, practical jokes were common place. And strangely, he and Teller did not get along at all! I can remember playing with my toys on the floor and he and Teller going at it - no idea what over, I was a little kid after-all. And I "loved" them both as uncles, it was a paradox. Through the years, I only remembered him as Uncle Lizard - LOL.
In reality, Szilard dies in 1964, after my grandfather's death (not a good year!), Teller dies in 2003, but in this movie, well he does not fair so well as far as longevity is concerned! :( If they had used Szilard, at least they could have had someone whom died closer to the movie year! Bad research there!
So, Teller is eventually found, having already invented a new type of bomb for an ill defined group of rich bad people. Napoleon and Illya do not fare well either, the girl turns out to be a double agent and amidst everyone's bungling - the bomb gets shipped. Nope not going to tell you more!
Lots of chase scenes, some comical and inventive. Lots of explosions. Action and adventure! All the teenage male mind requires!
However, don't expect good acting nor script nor usage of the actors to their best potential. The only interesting actors are the two prominent women. One, the East German, does extremely well and I never saw the solution coming which concerned her, then she become less interesting. The other is Italian and talk about under utilizing a talent or role! Gees, the director missed big time on that one! If you wanted a psychopath - it should have been her!
As for the male roles: Armie, of Lone Ranger fame, still needs to remember he is not an underwear model and actually start acting and not just strut into and out of a scene! As for Illya - a Russian accent is not that hard, and if you can not do it, maybe do a different kind of movie? Mr. Waverly is Hugh Grant (I think, it looked like him anyway). But, he plays a very minor role.
So, KGB vs CIA vs MI-6 ... so what happened to the GDU? You are playing in East Germany and there is no GDU presence? Heavens! About 20% of the East German population were GDU informers! What about the Stasi? Huge error here! So, I have to wonder once again why would you do a movie without doing just basic background research - or maybe just talking to an East German for a day about East German conditions? And for humor they could have tossed in a very young Putin as a Stasi wannabe worshiper (in the wrong place at the wrong time, but reality has already been violate here!). You know, beating up smaller children to take their stuffed toys away from them. (Teddy Bears today, Ukraine tomorrow?)
One, one second, nude scene which was completely unnecessary. Lots of shoot 'em up, bang 'em ups. Lots of missed opportunities. But, it was an entertaining 2 hours. In all, not much of a movie but so "C" grade that I may end up having to own this one!
And I have to admit with all of my walls down, running on new nature alone - it was an interesting adventure. No, I no longer like seeing movies by myself. And, in all it was an unsatisfying adventure because of that.
The movie was a bit weird. Napoleon is a sociopath? lllya is a psychopath? That is a new take there. Most of the movie seems have the two of them planning on how to the kill the other or at least get one upsmanship over each other. Add a young supposed East German female auto mechanic and you have some odd pairings.
The story revolves around Edvard Teller (Edward to the yanks), a nuclear scientist whom has gone missing and the father of the girl.
Okay, here reality gets strained horribly. Teller was one of my "uncles", him and father were best friends. He ran the Lawrence Livermore Labs, where father did much of his work on the hydrogen beast. It has been so long ago, I had even forgotten what he actually looked like! So, since the movie brought it up, I went on to the internet image files to see if I could spot him in the photos which would pop up.
Oh yeah, that also triggered a new memory as well.
As then I was to be reminded of Szilard, whose name I had long forgotten but whose bizarre antics and sense of humor helped to mold me in those early days. When I saw the scientists' images, memories came rushing back ... Of that group of scientists, it was Szilard whom I had the strongest memories of - he was one warped dude. The strangest of things fascinated him, practical jokes were common place. And strangely, he and Teller did not get along at all! I can remember playing with my toys on the floor and he and Teller going at it - no idea what over, I was a little kid after-all. And I "loved" them both as uncles, it was a paradox. Through the years, I only remembered him as Uncle Lizard - LOL.
In reality, Szilard dies in 1964, after my grandfather's death (not a good year!), Teller dies in 2003, but in this movie, well he does not fair so well as far as longevity is concerned! :( If they had used Szilard, at least they could have had someone whom died closer to the movie year! Bad research there!
So, Teller is eventually found, having already invented a new type of bomb for an ill defined group of rich bad people. Napoleon and Illya do not fare well either, the girl turns out to be a double agent and amidst everyone's bungling - the bomb gets shipped. Nope not going to tell you more!
Lots of chase scenes, some comical and inventive. Lots of explosions. Action and adventure! All the teenage male mind requires!
However, don't expect good acting nor script nor usage of the actors to their best potential. The only interesting actors are the two prominent women. One, the East German, does extremely well and I never saw the solution coming which concerned her, then she become less interesting. The other is Italian and talk about under utilizing a talent or role! Gees, the director missed big time on that one! If you wanted a psychopath - it should have been her!
As for the male roles: Armie, of Lone Ranger fame, still needs to remember he is not an underwear model and actually start acting and not just strut into and out of a scene! As for Illya - a Russian accent is not that hard, and if you can not do it, maybe do a different kind of movie? Mr. Waverly is Hugh Grant (I think, it looked like him anyway). But, he plays a very minor role.
So, KGB vs CIA vs MI-6 ... so what happened to the GDU? You are playing in East Germany and there is no GDU presence? Heavens! About 20% of the East German population were GDU informers! What about the Stasi? Huge error here! So, I have to wonder once again why would you do a movie without doing just basic background research - or maybe just talking to an East German for a day about East German conditions? And for humor they could have tossed in a very young Putin as a Stasi wannabe worshiper (in the wrong place at the wrong time, but reality has already been violate here!). You know, beating up smaller children to take their stuffed toys away from them. (Teddy Bears today, Ukraine tomorrow?)
One, one second, nude scene which was completely unnecessary. Lots of shoot 'em up, bang 'em ups. Lots of missed opportunities. But, it was an entertaining 2 hours. In all, not much of a movie but so "C" grade that I may end up having to own this one!
September 1, 2015
Lesson From A Surprising Death
Yeah, another death, not wholly unexpected but a surprise for nothing hinted at a sudden departure.
I really did not know the guy, he is the husband of a good friend, the father of two friends, the grand-father of many munchkins I have entertained in recent vacation bible schools. But, I only knew his name and that if I said "Hi", so would he. The entire time I have been here, he has been in a home due to his health - which was horrible.
So, his birthday was Saturday, many in his family from out of town were traveling to join with him in celebration. A good evening with friends and family on Thursday, he went out to the car to ride back to the home. But, he was struggling with the seat belt, his brother-in-law walked around the car to help him and he was gone! Just that fast!
I think it surprised everyone. But when I saw the family photo from only moments earlier - well, sudden memory of the death of my friend Robb Barr - same look. There is a medical name for it but who knows what it is?
Monday was the memorial service. I went for those I knew in his life, not to be a comforter but to be an affirmation of his Christian witness and presence now - somewhere I would long to be, were it possible. I was surprised that there was maybe 250+ in attendance!
He had a long history as a pastor of several churches and encourager - not to mention just a really nice guy.
The real reason I bring him and this incident up - was something the Pastor said during the service:
" ... he lived in the real-time, Paul encouraged us to ... ". The sermon ended for me there.
I wrote massive amounts of the operating system for the IBM real-time operating system. It was a brilliant concept and I ate the idea up. Up through 1992, I was still spending about 60% of my time traveling around the world attempting to correct operator errors that had crashed an IBM OS (at a cost of about $5m per downtime hour!). Yeah I was popular and only one of six in the world licensed by IBM as an 'expert'. (So, MicroSquish suck lemons over your attempt to write a pretend RTOS!)
So, I rolled this around in my mind ... living in the real-time as an aspect of our Christian lives? That statement has some real implications, whether the pastor was aware of this or not.
A RTOS runs under the concept of STATES. I save what the STATE of the computer was when I finish a task, I reload it when I need to restart it. In the meantime, other processes are running under their own STATE identifier, saving and loading as needed.
That means if you are a Sunday School Teacher, you access what you need when you need it and put it away when done. Seems elementary - but it means that your being a Sunday School Teacher is a only temporary STATE. You need to be ready to not ever do Sunday School Teacher again. When your queued to start up Counselor mode, you have ready access to all you need ... etc, etc, etc.
But, this means that you have done all of your background work! Everything you need has been done and is ready - you have gained the education that you need! You have the resources you need. You understand what you task is.
My now dead church member spent many years in school. He taught, he preached, he counseled, he loved his wife and raised his children. He faced today, the now, always ready to switch roles, step out of his comfort zone, to do what was needed when it was needed for God ... not himself. He rarely talked about the past, today was what he was interested in.
Yeah, I could understand that now, I doubt anyone else could, but then, perhaps God meant that message to me - to get me out of my comfortable well worn ruts and prepare for what comes next.
I know, you are going, "Well DUH Kris!" But, remember I am in rebuild mode, year 2. So much to learn, it is like I am being hit with a firehose at times! And this, Tim, is a lesson I will remember, because you talked my language. Probably another lesson in that last statement as well.
I really did not know the guy, he is the husband of a good friend, the father of two friends, the grand-father of many munchkins I have entertained in recent vacation bible schools. But, I only knew his name and that if I said "Hi", so would he. The entire time I have been here, he has been in a home due to his health - which was horrible.
So, his birthday was Saturday, many in his family from out of town were traveling to join with him in celebration. A good evening with friends and family on Thursday, he went out to the car to ride back to the home. But, he was struggling with the seat belt, his brother-in-law walked around the car to help him and he was gone! Just that fast!
I think it surprised everyone. But when I saw the family photo from only moments earlier - well, sudden memory of the death of my friend Robb Barr - same look. There is a medical name for it but who knows what it is?
Monday was the memorial service. I went for those I knew in his life, not to be a comforter but to be an affirmation of his Christian witness and presence now - somewhere I would long to be, were it possible. I was surprised that there was maybe 250+ in attendance!
He had a long history as a pastor of several churches and encourager - not to mention just a really nice guy.
The real reason I bring him and this incident up - was something the Pastor said during the service:
" ... he lived in the real-time, Paul encouraged us to ... ". The sermon ended for me there.
I wrote massive amounts of the operating system for the IBM real-time operating system. It was a brilliant concept and I ate the idea up. Up through 1992, I was still spending about 60% of my time traveling around the world attempting to correct operator errors that had crashed an IBM OS (at a cost of about $5m per downtime hour!). Yeah I was popular and only one of six in the world licensed by IBM as an 'expert'. (So, MicroSquish suck lemons over your attempt to write a pretend RTOS!)
So, I rolled this around in my mind ... living in the real-time as an aspect of our Christian lives? That statement has some real implications, whether the pastor was aware of this or not.
A RTOS runs under the concept of STATES. I save what the STATE of the computer was when I finish a task, I reload it when I need to restart it. In the meantime, other processes are running under their own STATE identifier, saving and loading as needed.
That means if you are a Sunday School Teacher, you access what you need when you need it and put it away when done. Seems elementary - but it means that your being a Sunday School Teacher is a only temporary STATE. You need to be ready to not ever do Sunday School Teacher again. When your queued to start up Counselor mode, you have ready access to all you need ... etc, etc, etc.
But, this means that you have done all of your background work! Everything you need has been done and is ready - you have gained the education that you need! You have the resources you need. You understand what you task is.
My now dead church member spent many years in school. He taught, he preached, he counseled, he loved his wife and raised his children. He faced today, the now, always ready to switch roles, step out of his comfort zone, to do what was needed when it was needed for God ... not himself. He rarely talked about the past, today was what he was interested in.
Yeah, I could understand that now, I doubt anyone else could, but then, perhaps God meant that message to me - to get me out of my comfortable well worn ruts and prepare for what comes next.
I know, you are going, "Well DUH Kris!" But, remember I am in rebuild mode, year 2. So much to learn, it is like I am being hit with a firehose at times! And this, Tim, is a lesson I will remember, because you talked my language. Probably another lesson in that last statement as well.
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