Waiting

Patience has not historically been exactly a strong suite of mine.  Nothing is more frustrating than having to wait and wait and wait and wait!  And it seems that is what has defined almost all aspects of my life for the past six years.

As I have thought about these past several years, and I have had plenty of time to do so!, I am struck at how God has tested me bit by bit in this area.

Originally, it was all shrouded in situations.  Random events that required me to draw upon something far greater than me to accomplish whatever the task.  And just when it looks like I will succeed ... yeah, well that success is snatched away.  I really do not understand this last piece of the puzzle.  I already understand failure, I have a lifetime of people telling me how stupid I am, how I can never hope to compete, how I should never even try ...

And yet God challenges me time and time again - to wait.  To frustrate me beyond all reality at the hopelessness of a situation - and to wait on Him.  Wait, wait, wait, wait!  Oh, if you want to actually complete something to its conclusion - sorry: the lesson here is to wait.

Sigh.

I think I am pretty good at waiting now.

Sigh.

So, I see this year wrapping up.  A year of nothing but doctors, surgeries, emergency rooms, beds and looking at my foot up in the air ...  Yeah, I still have four months to go to get out of this year and on with my life - assuming of course, that this foot is able to stop being the center of attention!

I have friends whom want to go metal detecting.
I have a friend whom wants me to go help bury his mother - she is still in the trunk of his car.
(yeah, that sounds weird but she was cremated!)
I have pages of things to do requiring two feet!
And let us not forget that even part time employment would help greatly!

And I am waiting ... waiting ... waiting on God to move, to do whatever it is that is required for Kris to restart life.  I want to, I am ready, I need to ...

As Dutchman observed several months back, none of this may have anything to do with me - I am just the tool being used to deal with Gaelic Girl.  Oh joy!  Only God would think He could alter GG's path - especially using me - scum of the Earth!  But, hey, I am not God, I am just the tool, right?  Can anything alter a greying flaming red haired Irish girl's path?

Well, whatever the purpose, I sure hope this is over soon ... I am going stir crazy!