It Is All About The Heart

As I have struggled through the past two months, I have pondered the utter destruction of Kris in June and all of those questions this brings up that I do not even possess the ability to form words around.  Kris is been broken, but what broke and why, however am I to begin repairs or even know how to pray?!?!?!?!?

Then it hit me this morning, it all revolves around the heart ... something I never possessed but must now make allowance for.  So me and God have been having some long talks since last Thursday, for even as new as my heart is He gave me, it was broken too.

A renewed heart is what I am pondering: what is it, how is it renewed, how can I possess and protect it?

A Renewed Heart is:
     awed by the Word of God - Psalms 119:161
     broken - Psalms 34:18, 51:17
     circumcised - Deuteronomy  30:6, Romans 2:29
     clean - Psalms 73:1
     confident in God - Psalms 112:7
     desirous of God - Psalms 84:2
     devoted to God - Psalms 9:1, 199:10/69/145
     enlarged - Psalms 119:32, II Corinthians 6:11
     faithful to God - Nehemiah 9:8
     filled with the fear of God - Jeremiah 32:40
     filled with the law of God - Psalms 40:8, 119:11
     fixed on God - Psalms 57:7, 112:7
     honest and good - Luke 8:15
     inclined to obedience - Psalms 119:112
     joyful in God - 1 Samuel 2:1, Zechariah 10:7
     meditative - Psalms 4:4, 77:6
     obedient - Psalms 119:112, Romans 6:17
     perfect with God - 1 Kings 8:61, Psalms 101:2
     prayerful - 1 Samuel 1:13, Psalms 27:8
     pure - Psalms 24:4, Matthew 5:8
     seeks God - 2 Chronicles 19:3, Ezra 7:10, Psalms 10:17
     sincere - Acts 2:46, Hebrews 10:22
     sympathizing - Jeremiah 4:19, Lamentations 3:51
     tender - 1 Samuel 24:5, II Kings 22:19
     treasury of good - Matthew 12:35
     upright - Psalms 97:11, 125:4
     void of fear - Psalms 27:3
     wise - Proverbs 10:8, 14:33, 23:15
     zealous - II Chronicles 17:6, Jeremiah 20:9

(I hope I transcribed my list of verses correctly!  I swear my eyes were crossing after line 3!)

So, I look at this list of what I have designated a renewed heart - the goal for this gift God gave me - and the new creation of, as I am rebuilt.  I see in the list I could have easily checked them off under my old nature but much of that would have been legalism, which is not the intent of God.  God's intent is not that we have to justify anything - face it we can't, He already knows the score internally on both of us!  You have to decide where you stand and make corrections, just like me.

I see this list as the list of: in humility, can I see in myself - without explanation - these attributes?

Am I awed by the Word of God?  If not, then I have a problem.
All the way through, Am I zealous in my heart for God?  If not, again a problem to correct.

If this list is what God expects of me and this heart, then this is what must become my goal.  Most I do not really see as a problem, the good carry over from whom I was before, but some perplex me, like zealous.  I have no clue what the context is much less what it looks like or creates that.  And truthfully, I am not so sure I have ever been exactly zealous successfully over anything.

Yeah, some interesting growth challenges for me to muddle through.
Perhaps for you too ...