As the photo shows, two months of this weird massage and the foot had gone down significantly, but was still large enough to make wearing a shoe difficult. (early photos would have made you nauseous!)
And then, came the physical therapy appointment on the 9th ...
We were chatting, as we usually did. Abby is a delightful lady, good at what she does and with a delicious sense of humor. She may well be only the second Gentle Woman, I have ever met, much less heard of! Her hands moved to the big toe and she began the gentle massage. It feels weird, I am still not sure that it is pleasant or nauseating ... Suddenly, there is a "pop", sort of like popping your knuckles - only she was not working on the joint! We both looked at the toe, which instantly started swelling. We looked questioningly at each other. Then back at the toe which was now swelling the foot massively!
She ran and grabbed a wheel chair and with in moments (literally!) had me into the infectious disease doctor. Officially, I was under his care, because I had contracted anti-biotic resistant staph at the hospital which did the last surgery. We had fought that bug and were moving on with my treatment - but something was now horribly wrong now.
One look and the doctor said, "Okay, looks like the staph is back, protected by a cyst, and this time it will resist the only anti-biotic which could work. So, you can lose the foot or lose your life ....."
It was not much of a choice. I would have chosen death - gladly. But, I had one hope in this world left in my heart, of a better future, with or without the foot.
I chose life. Eight minutes had passed since the "pop".
The foot was removed by a surgical friend, whom happened to be passing through ER on Friday, when the call went out for an emergency amputation. It went well. He was happy. The church elders visited that night, but I really was out of it! All I really remember was one of the elderly ladies in the church in the group, she was talking to me but I could not understand what she was saying. I also remember seeing the Pastor and a crowd of men I could not focus on ... (!?!)
But, the infection had spread into the shin area and on the 10th, the leg was taken.
My next memory was not until the 17th. Yet I know that my oldest daughter was coming daily with her children to visit. My son and his girl friend. Yes, even Gaelic Girl as well. And I struggled. I had no idea whom anyone was!
But, on the 17th, my mind kicked in. And I knew it was a blank. Everything had been erased. Well, there was one memory of a person and I could not understand why they did not come - just all of these strangers.
So, now it is Monday, one year later. My memory is still gone - there is nothing - save that one memory. Lots of new memories though. The brain works fine, there is just not much for it to work on or with!
The leg struggles. I have now made it to 21 straight days of being able to wear my prosthetic. Yeah, wearing the leg seems to be causing constant staph infections! Or small abrasions, which then get staph infections! And the leg swells up, the prosthetic no longer will fit. Wait to get the leg back down in size and start over at breaking into wearing the leg! Repeat without end it seems! But, now we are at the border of a small success!
So, I have asked all of my family, Swede - without whom I could not have survived the past year!, Gaelic Girl, as well as, Abby and her husband to dinner. A time to celebrate life and those whom so instrumental in pulling me through this!
Sadly, there are those I count on for prayer, and scores more I do not even know, whom have lifted me up to God in this battle. I know it. I feel it. It is all that carries me forward day by day in maintaining me through my many losses and set backs.
And I thank all of you ...
:)
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